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A new and humorous story - add a couple of sentences

(110 Posts)
nanna8 Tue 20-Apr-21 14:07:05

One day Mrs. N. Parker was doing her usual,watching her neighbours from her upstairs bedroom through the net
curtains. She peered at the young couple next door and to her surprise she saw them ....

tiredoldwoman Tue 20-Apr-21 18:42:09

both with toilet roll ' binoculars ' staring up at her . She jumped back pretending that she'd been adjusting her curtains , just at that her phone rang.....

Septimia Tue 20-Apr-21 19:54:31

It was her neighbour on the other side. She said, "You know that young couple next door to you....."

Grammaretto Tue 20-Apr-21 19:59:39

They asked me if I thought you were alright as you seem to spend a lot of time at the window....

fairfraise Tue 20-Apr-21 20:19:31

She replied and said "It's my only entertainment, I have nothing else to do! "

Bridgeit Tue 20-Apr-21 20:25:20

I told them that you had not been alright since they moved in..

JaneJudge Tue 20-Apr-21 20:29:13

all that staring and spying and had brought up an ongoing paranoia. Mrs Parker could no longer bark like a dog in the downstairs cloakroom as the elderly couple the other side had made a complaint

FarNorth Tue 20-Apr-21 20:44:19

Their parrot was being made very nervous by the barking, especially in the early hours.

Savvy Tue 20-Apr-21 21:09:50

But that was nothing to how it was affecting their cat. Each time she barked, the cat ran up the curtains, and using its claws, abseiled down again, tearing the fabric to shreds.

CherryCezzy Tue 20-Apr-21 21:16:18

Mrs Parker noticed the ragged curtains and realised the cat had done her bidding. She stopped barking and started to laugh sarcastically.

Savvy Tue 20-Apr-21 21:20:55

The laughter started the parrot off again and soon the air was filled with coloured feathers.

fairfraise Tue 20-Apr-21 21:23:47

That's it now she thought. I can't mend those it will be like joining holes together. So she fetched her little step ladder and climbed up to pull the curtains down. Oh no, they'll see me now!

nanna8 Wed 21-Apr-21 00:06:53

In her panic she tripped and fell off her stepladder and let rip with a mighty shout of the ‘f’ word. Half the neighbourhood heard her and, as this was a very gentile area, they ...

Savvy Wed 21-Apr-21 00:13:51

Tutted loudly in their disapproval and sadly shook their heads.

BrightandBreezy Wed 21-Apr-21 00:37:05

It was clear that things were going down hill rapidly and they all thought that Mrs Parker definitely lowered the tone of the area.

FarNorth Wed 21-Apr-21 01:39:17

Fred Higgles at no 9 started a petition to the council : "We demand that Mrs N Parker be rehoused far away from Snoots Bank."
(Snoots Bank was the name of the area they lived in.)

nanna8 Wed 21-Apr-21 02:16:00

Many neighbours signed the petition but others got wind of it and decided to organise a March against the petitioners for discrimination against the nosy people in our midst. They organised anoraks embroidered with large N s...

tiredoldwoman Wed 21-Apr-21 08:01:48

Nosey Parkers and Noisy Parrots Rule ok !
Kate Moss got involved , strutted her stuff on the catwalk naked under the anorak , Nigella thought the large N was for her , but no matter they........

fairfraise Wed 21-Apr-21 08:50:57

Mrs Bucket who lived opposite fetched a piece of cardboard and a felt pen and wrote "Nora Parker isjust fine. Leave her alone. She brings me a glass of home made wine and she's OK to know". She stood outside and held it high.

BigBertha1 Wed 21-Apr-21 10:04:14

What was strange was that a man in a dark suit and Raybans arrived at Mrs Parkers door carrying what looked like a violin case.

tiredoldwoman Wed 21-Apr-21 12:56:36

It was Robert de Niro ( talking Italian) , looking for a room to rent . Bon giorno , he said kissing the back of her hand ........

tiredoldwoman Wed 21-Apr-21 12:57:36

Would you like a glass of my home made wine , she asked .

Calendargirl Wed 21-Apr-21 13:01:52

He recoiled, shocked to see all the age related freckles and spots thereon, quite forgetting that he too, was no longer in the first flush of youth, and was having to resort to taking part in tv adverts instead of Hollywood blockbusters.

LindaPat Wed 21-Apr-21 13:07:51

Si,gratzi senora, he answered. But while she was in the kitchen he opened the violin case and took out.....

Savvy Wed 21-Apr-21 13:10:41

But he accepted the offer of a glass of wine.

After just one sip the room began to spin and he landed with a thud against the window in full view of the stunned protesters.