Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway)

The guy in that painting is weird
His beard is all multi-tiered
It needs a good trim
And that glittery fin

The guy in that painting is weird
His beard is all multi-tiered
It needs a good trim
And that glittery fin
I’m hoping it soon will be sheared.

The sky is incredibly blue

The sky is incredibly blue
We must be in Honolulu

The sky is incredibly blue
We must be in Honolulu
The white sand and palm trees

The sky is incredibly blue
We must be in Honolulu
White sand and palm trees
Grass skirts sway in breeze

The sky is incredibly blue
We must be in Honolulu
White sand and palm trees
Grass skirts sway in breeze
While I lie here and take in the view

I wake from my dream with a start

I wake from my dream with a start
My happiness fallen apart

I wake from my dream with a start
My happiness fallen apart
I'm back to real life

The guy in that painting is weird
His beard is all multi-tiered
It needs a good trim
And a scrub with Vim

Possibly wrong page, Squiffy?

I wake from my dream with a start
My happiness fallen apart
I'm back to real life
Of worry & strife

I wake from my dream with a start
My happiness fallen apart
I'm back to real life
Of worry & strife
I'll plan a holiday and be smart.

I get all the brochures and costs

I wake from my dream with a start
My happiness fallen apart
I'm back to real life
Of worry & strife
Betrayal and a broken heart

My children have long flown the nest

Sorry, first too late there....

I get all the brochures and costs
To get away from freezing frosts

I get all the brochures and costs
To get away from freezing frosts
I'll dream of warm climes

I get all the brochures and costs
To get away from freezing frosts
I'll dream of warm climes
And happier times

I get all the brochures and costs
To get away from freezing frosts
I'll dream of warm climes
And happier times
But all this my budget exhausts.

Soon our earth will have no more freezing

Soon our earth will have no more freezing
Time to work on it unceasing

Soon our earth will have no more freezing
Time to work on it unceasing
Let's all have a party

Soon our earth will have no more freezing
Time to work on it unceasing
Let's all have a party
I’ll bring Todd Carty

Soon our earth will have no more freezing
Time to work on it unceasing
Let's all have a party
I'll bring Todd Carry
For everyone that will be pleasing.

It's high time for a limbo contest

It's high time for a limbo contest
Count me out, I have a large chest

It's high time for a limbo contest
Count me out, I have a large chest
The limbo? You jest!

It's high time for a limbo contest
Count me out, I have a large chest
The limbo? You jest!
If I could suggest

It's high time for a limbo contest
Count me out, I have a large chest
The limbo? You jest!
If I could suggest
This Limerick is just the best😂

The one job I hate, is ironing