Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway) (

The stormy wind is getting stronger
It’s blowing louder & longer
Petals are dropping,
Power is stopping,
Looks like today is a gonner

On days like this my mind wanders

On days like this my mind wanders
I like to sit a ponder
On many things

On days like this my mind wanders
I like to sit a ponder
On many things
Like cats and kings

And sit and look o’er yonder

And sit and look o’er yonder

I cooked a veggie dish today

I cooked a veggie dish today
Lunch for friend who came to stay

I cooked a veggie dish today
Lunch for friend who came to stay
They sat round the table

I cooked a veggie dish today
Lunch for few friends who came to stay,
They sat round the table
We were all able

I cooked a veggie dish today
Lunch for some friends who came to stay,
They sat round the table
We were all able
But I had to throw much food away

My cooking skills have not improved

My cooking skills have not improved
In fact, they got worse when I moved

I moved to a house
And inside was a mouse

My cooking skills have not improved
In fact, they got worse when I moved,
The smell of burning

My cooking skills have not improved
In fact, they got worse when I moved
I moved to a house
And inside was a mouse
So now I am feeling confused

My new house has a great big tree

It’s all become very confusing but let’s go with..

My new house has a great big tree
With problem roots I can foresee

My new house has a great big tree
With problem roots I can foresee
There's bound to be trouble

My new house has a great big tree
With problem roots I can foresee
There's bound to be trouble
The builders left rubble

My new house has a great big tree
With problem roots I can foresee
There's bound to be trouble
The builders left rubble
The cleanup will cost a large fee

The neighbors all seem to be strange

The neighbors all seem to be strange
It looks like they are all deranged

The neighbours all seem to be strange
It looks like they are all deranged
They look quite a sight
When they are dancing all night

The neighbours all seem to be strange
It looks like they are all deranged
They look quite a sight
When dancing all night
Wish the house had not been exchanged.

Physiotherapists from Gwent

Physiotherapists from Gwent
Off on a mad ‘jolly’ they went

Physiotherapists from Gwent
Off on a mad ‘jolly’ they went
And yes it was mad

Physiotherapists from Gwent
Off on a mad ‘jolly’ they went
And yes it was mad
They all became sad

Physiotherapists from Gwent
Off on a mad ‘jolly’ they went
And yes it was mad
They all became sad
Not a successful event

They glumly returned back to Wales

They glumly returned back to Wales
Walked home as slowly as snails