Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway) (

Sunday is turning out boring
Partner is still in bed snoring
Not one person called
On the sofa I sprawled
So soon the wine I’ll be pouring

Family Sunday roasts were best

What’s all this fuss about tax?
Said Ms Rayner – on getting attacks;
Those nasty Tories,
Are just telling stories,
Along with their media hacks.

Hubby and I bought a council house each –
Once evil Thatcher put them in reach;
Who’s a hypocrite – ME?!
But we’re quids-in, tee-hee,
It’s for YOU to practise what I preach!

[& to continue . . .]
Family Sunday roasts were best –
If prepared by all the rest.

Why shouldn't they have bought a council place each?

More to the point, why should people who have never and will never live in a council property benefit from it, as happens ALL the time around here.

And to continue, following hijack 😂

Family Sunday roasts were best –
If prepared by all the rest,
Cabbage and carrots

Family Sunday roasts were best –
If prepared by all the rest,
Cabbage and carrots
Hope there’s no maggots

Family Sunday roasts were best –
If prepared by all the rest,
Cabbage and carrots
Hope there’s no maggots
But there , that’ll be quite a test

Those were good old family times

Those were good old family times
Where we told our favourite rhymes

Those were good old family times
Where we told our favourite rhymes
We loved the applause

Those were good old family times
Where we told our favourite rhymes
We loved the applause
We kept to the laws

Those were good old family times
Where we told our favourite rhymes
We loved the applause
We kept to the laws
And didn't commit any crimes

My tulips were looking their best

My tulips were looking their best
Until rabbits came, they're a pest

My tulips were looking their best
Until rabbits came, they're a pest
They gnawed at the leaves

My tulips were looking their best
Until rabbits came, they're a pest
They gnawed at the leaves
Pesky little thieves

My tulips were looking their best
Until rabbits came, they're a pest
They gnawed at the leaves
Pesky little thieves
Come on, bunnies, give it a rest!

Where I live, the problem is deer

Where I live, the problem is deer
Beautiful creatures, so very near !

Where I live, the problem is deer
They sneak up I do not hear

Where I live, the problem is deer
Beautiful creatures, so very near !
So often unseen

Where I live, the problem is deer
Beautiful creatures, so very near !
So often unseen
Yet know where they've been

Where I live the problem is deer
Beautiful creatures, so very near
So often unseen
Yet know where they’ve been
When seeing them, makes me shed tears

I’m papering walls in the loo

I’m papering walls in the loo
Willow pattern in white and blue

I’m papering walls in the loo
Willow pattern in white and blue
That sounds quite pretty

I’m papering walls in the loo
Willow pattern in white and blue
That sounds quite pretty
But the matching is bitty

I’m papering walls in the loo
Willow pattern in white and blue
That sounds quite pretty
Matching is bitty
Bitten off more than I can chew

My forte I never have found

My forte I never have found
In circles I'm going around