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Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway) (

(1001 Posts)
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crazyH Sat 11-Nov-23 23:04:20

Contd.
There was an old Gran with a wart
Which really bothered her a lot

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Gwyllt Fri 29-Dec-23 22:52:16

I will go indoors where it's quiet
I think I’ll start my new year diet
Eat anything green
Feel like a queen

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BrightandBreezy Fri 29-Dec-23 23:50:10

I will go indoors where it's quiet
I think I''ll start my New Year diet
Eat anything green
Feel like a queen
So hangry could start a riot.

It's too much effort to get slim

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65KL Sat 30-Dec-23 07:49:47

It's too much effort to get slim
I don't like sweating at the gym

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Gwyllt Sat 30-Dec-23 08:29:55

It's too much effort to get slim
I don't like sweating at the gym
Who wants to be size ten

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henetha Sat 30-Dec-23 10:41:42

It's too much effort to get slim
I don't like sweating at the gym
Who wants to be size ten,
I do, now and then,

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GoldenLady Sat 30-Dec-23 16:13:12

It's too much effort to get slim
I don't like sweating at the gym
Who wants to be size ten,
I do, now and then,
But dieting rules are too grim

My cell phone's a mystery to me

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Squiffy Sat 30-Dec-23 16:29:01

My cell phone's a mystery to me
It scrambles my poor brain you see

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Gwyllt Sat 30-Dec-23 18:42:50

My cell phone's a mystery to me
It scrambles my poor brain you see
It sends my message to a stranger

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crazyH Sat 30-Dec-23 20:34:41

(Slight syllable adjustment)
My cell phone's a mystery to me
It scrambles my poor brain you see
Messaging strangers
Inviting dangers

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GoldenLady Sun 31-Dec-23 15:50:38

My cell phone's a mystery to me
It scrambles my poor brain you see
Messaging strangers
Inviting dangers
Too hard, if you are over three

But children are good with devices

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VB000 Tue 02-Jan-24 11:26:30

But children are good with devices
Shame about the high tech prices

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GoldenLady Tue 02-Jan-24 15:23:55

But children are good with devices
Shame about the high tech prices
Doesn't stop all the buying

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BrightandBreezy Wed 03-Jan-24 01:35:00

But children are good with devices
Shame about the high tech prices
Doesn't stop all the buying
I'm so not lying

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henetha Wed 03-Jan-24 10:22:55

But children are good with devices
Shame about the high tech prices
Doesn't stop buying 88558
I'm so not lying
But tech is good in a crisis.

A young chap from Birmingham said

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Bellanonna Wed 03-Jan-24 11:39:04

A young chap from Birmingham said
You know, I’m extremely well read

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crazyH Wed 03-Jan-24 11:59:17

A young chap from Birmingham said
You know, I’m extremely well read
Shakespeare is my muse

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Squiffy Wed 03-Jan-24 12:33:02

A young chap from Birmingham said
You know, I’m extremely well read
Shakespeare is my muse
Chaucer lights my fuse

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crazyH Wed 03-Jan-24 13:03:55

A young chap from Birmingham said
You know, I’m extremely well read
Shakespeare is my muse
Chaucer lights my fuse,
I always take Tolstoy to bed.

Me, I’m still on Grimms Fairy Tales

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VB000 Wed 03-Jan-24 14:06:00

Me, I’m still on Grimms Fairy Tales
And a good story never fails

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65KL Wed 03-Jan-24 15:04:41

Me, I'm still on Grimms Fairy Tales
And a good story never fails
Scary bad witches

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GoldenLady Wed 03-Jan-24 15:23:18

Me, I'm still on Grimms Fairy Tales
And a good story never fails
Scary bad witches
With warts, bumps, and twitches

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BrightandBreezy Thu 04-Jan-24 20:05:18

Me, I'm still on Grimms Fairy Tales
And a good story never fails
Scary bad witches
With warts, bumps and twitches
Tall tales in the pub with great ales.

Some love a mystery story

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crazyH Thu 04-Jan-24 20:13:55

Some love a mystery story
Whodunnits , but not too gory

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Salti Thu 04-Jan-24 20:42:07

Some love a mystery story
Whodunnits , but not too gory
Agatha Christie

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BrightandBreezy Fri 05-Jan-24 21:55:30

Some love a mystery story
Whodunnits, but not too gory
Agatha Christie
Clues a bit misty

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