LIMERICKS (Apr ‘25)

They take turns to bring tea in bed
And she always makes sure he's well fed
I'd want more than that

They take turns to bring tea in bed
And she always makes sure he’s well fed
I’d want more than that
I don’t want a prat

They take turns to bring tea in bed
She always makes sure he’s well fed
I’d want more than that
I don’t want a prat
Someone who’s wealthy and well-read

There was a young lady called Jane

There was a young lady called Jane
And she was incredibly vain

There was a young lady called Jane
And she was incredibly vain
Not much of a friend

There was a young lady called Jane
And she was incredibly vain
Not much of a friend
She started a trend

There was a young lady called Jane
And she was incredibly vain
Not much of a friend
She started a trend
Which caught on and became a pain.

But it's made her a millionaire

But it’s made her a millionaire
And also a soul I can’t bear

But it's made her a millionaire
And also a soul I can't bear
She's dropped all her friends

But it's made her a millionaire
And also a soul I can't bear
She's dropped all her friends
Happy ? She pretends

But it’s made her a millionaire
And also a soul I can’t bear
She’s dropped all her friends
Happy? She pretends
As long as she’s gone I don’t care.

I’ve not yet renounced all the world

I've not yet renounced all the world
My hair is professionally curled

I've not yet renounced all the world
My hair is professionally curled
I wear make-up too

I’ve not yet renounced all the world
My hair is professionally curled
I wear makeup too
My eyeshadow’s blue

I've not yet renounced all the world
My hair is professionally curled
I wear makeup too
My eyeshadow's blue
In my ballgown, I twirled and twirled

I once met a woman from France

I once met a woman from France
Who said she was expert at “Dance”

I once met a woman from France
Who said she expert at “Dance”
Her tango just stunned

I once met a woman from France
Who said she expert at “Dance”
Her tango just stunned
And by some she was shunned

I once met a woman from France
Who said she was expert at Dance
Her tango just stunned
And by some she was shunned
But others just loved the romance

She was so good she soon won a medal

She was so good she soon won a medal
Worked hard for us to bedazzle

She was so good she soon won a medal
Worked hard for us to bedazzle
Her rumba was great

She was so good she soon won a medal
Worked hard for us to bedazzle
Her rumba was great
Wild and crazy, not straight

She was so good she soon won a medal
Worked hard for us to bedazzle
Her rumba was great
Wild and crazy, not straight
First, and with no fiddle faddle.

I watch the dancing, not soccer

I watch the dancing, not soccer
But the last one I watched was a shocker

I watch the dancing, not soccer
But the last one I watched was a shocker
They fell to the floor