How much is enough -Xmas presents for a GC?

Indinana - my sentiments exactly, couldn't have put it better.

Indinana - my sentiments exactly, couldn't have put it better.

woah! 32 ????? no way! My GC will get one present from their parents, one each from their 2 uncles and aunts , ditto grandparents - maybe a godparent might put something into their savings account and apart from small stockings that will be it! As adults we give one member of the family (drawn from a hat) a decent present and everyone else gets a little present with a max £5 spend. Some years ago we decided an orgy of present giving was ludicrous. I do see if you have a huge family that are all going to be there at Christmas then its difficult - but as always small children enjoy the paper and boxes as much as any present and older ones are keen to boost their savings! who wants to spend Christmas Day in a sea of wrapping paper anyway?

A couple of weeks ago my dgd who is 8 in two weeks said to me...
''Granny, do you know that the adverts on tv aren't really true, they make the toys look so good but they're not like that in real life''

For her birthday she is getting a very basic horse riding hat (properly measured) and being allowed to pick a new clothing item from New Look (cheap stuff and her first time in a 'nearly teen shop'. We are taking her out this afternoon to do this.
She doesn't know that there will be surprise tickets in her birthday card so that she and I will have a girly night and go to the local small town panto £9 each.

Then comes Christmas and from us she is getting a pogo stick, a globe of the world and a boxed set of books from TK Maxx.

We try to be sensible but I still feel it's a little much from us.
Especially as we have 4 dgc.
We are not well off but lucky that we can manage it . However, I come from a background of previously having to watch every penny and I still feel it's not right to be sensible.
Dh would just keep buying for them and I have to sit on him a bit.

vampirequeen - re advertising , when my own children were little I introduced a rule which said that anything I knew they had seen advertised on television they would NOT be getting - this was very funny as everytime the adverts came on they would rush out of the room- double bonus!!! I am not really a horrid person but I hate the pressure TV advertisements put on families. (GD will be getting grooming brushes for the pony she is allowed to ride - probably bright pink but that is another story)

We seem to live in such a consumeristic (don't know if that's a made up word ) society. People are encouraged to buy more and more and more. Then when they get it all they're encouraged to replace their stuff with newer models.

I saw an advert recently for an expensive television which told people they 'needed' it so that they and their children could have a good Christmas. I admit to being a tele watcher but I don't need a £4000 television. People seem to be hooked on owning stuff no matter how it affects them financially. Is this a result of them being targeted as children? Wasn't it about 30 years ago that the massive swing to child advertising began?

Granarchist that's very funny!

TV ads for computer games is another big con because the animation you see in the ad is much better than you get in the actual game - but you have to watch out for the small print statement that appears on the screen to know this. I have a bee in my bonnet about this one, because I know using cartoons is aimed at children.

OMG 32 presents ! We have twin GC so that would be 64 !! Our DD and DS have asked people to stop giving loads of pressies as they do not have the room for any more . We are all contributing to a trampoline for the twins and DD has suggested all chipping in for a scooter for DGD , with small things to open like sticker books and felt tips ( always needed) . I always treat them all to a show or panto too . We have never spent much on Christmas presents even when our kids were young and they still had a great time -silly games and family outings were the highlights not expensive presents ( very poor then )

Oh Good! I am glad this came up. I have nine grandchildren, and four children with spouses. They all get £20 each to buy what they like. The youngest GC is 12. Having read all the above posts I don't feel so mean. All but one family lives away from me and the postage on parcels became horrendous. When I said to my son-in-law that it didn't feel as if I was making much effort he was quick to tell me he loved spending the money on Amazon on books.
Margaret

I think that a lot of presents can be overwhelming. Years ago my husband was made redundant in the run up to Christmas so there wasn't the money to spend I felt mean, the children didn't notice though!, fortunately he got a new job in the January and I decided that I would start my Christmas shopping each week I picked up something to guarantee a 'better' Christmas that year. The week before Christmas we got down all the things I had bought and it was a ridiculous amount, there were things I had forgotten buying!, there was far far too much and it was the most miserable Christmas the children were overwhelmed and argued grizzled and whinged all day. I know now I bought to make myself feel better for letting them down in my eyes and also probably to keep up with everyone else. The following year we bought them a desk and chair each and filled them with wrapped colouring books and puzzles and it was perfect.

I agree with Lucky girl, one present, or a small present with a bit of money to put into a savings account so that when they really want something they can get it.
I think they must get exhausted and overwrought by having so many.
As a child I got a lovely stocking and then a few presents from my parents and I always had a happy time. I think people can completely overdo Christmas.

We have set a fixed amount for each DGS's Christmas and birthday presents, then ask our DC what they want us to spend it on, as they all have so much already. This Christmas one DGS is getting a particular present that he really wants to the full amount, the other two are each getting a token present to unwrap and the balance is going into their premium bond accounts.

Our DGS1 was born on Christmas Eve. He gets presents on both days as DD doesn't want him to feel deprived, but she puts away a lot of the gifts and gradually gives them out during the year. As he gets older (9 next birthday) fewer toys and more money/vouchers are being given.

IMO 32 presents from parents alone is obscene considering the number of children in this world who have virtually nothing!

I know it's the parents giving 32 gifts, but the other thing about too many gifts is the child doesn't remember who gave him/her the different gifts. How can they learn to appreciate anything? S

I am glad to have found this thread. It is my grandchild's very first Christmas and quite frankly I'm dreading it. I have a stepgrandchild and quite frankly the amount of 'stuff' he gets at the drop of a hat is quite frankly obscene. Now I am in a quandary, as no way am I competing with the other grandparents and family members who all have designer this and that for themselves and their children. I was actually laughed at by one of the other children because I did not know a certain make of jumper, this by a 10 year old!
The stepgrandchild we usually give a giftcard or money as he is older and it is very difficult to buy for someone we really don't see that often or know very well. My grandchild will only be a baby but her birthday is the January.
I thought some clothing and perhaps a book and toy. For her birthday say pyjamas and a wee book and toy. I was also going to ask her parents if they had a savings account for her and I would perhaps put money into that for her birthday,with perhaps a book or toy. It is so difficult as they all get so much and not just wee gifts either. I am quite sure the rest of the family (including the wee one's parents) will just go completely OTT.

30+years ago, age two and a half my DD received 21 presents from my PILs. The pile of gifts just seemed to never end and when she had finally unwrapped the last one MIL suddenly said " Oh we have forgotten the main present" and rushed out of the lounge and returned carrying a dolls cot complete with another teddy bear! Our small gifts and Christmas stocking were pushed to one side and MIL's gifts were "more important". I was very upset but said nothing.

On Boxing Day DH and I sat with our DD and watched her open all her presents from us whilst MIL was busy

I did not want DD to be spoilt like that again. I don't know what DH said to MIL but the following year there were about 6 gifts for DD from MIL.

My DPs lived abroad and every year would send a pretty dress and a small toy for DD which I felt was very generous.

Our Grandchildren get presents from all sorts of family friends too- as well as parents, us and other GP, and so many family members. As said, obscene- and I do hate it and spoils Christmas for me. It is just toooo much and non-sensical. We've been invited for Christmas and will probably go, and of course not say a thing and have a wonderful time with the GCs- despite the presents.

I can't think of 32 presents to buy!!

This year I've bought the two youngest grandchildren (both aged 4 months)clothes and the others (18 months to 7) have one gift each. Each grandchild also gets £20 on his/her birthday.

I always ask the parents for advice on what the GC need or want. DiL in particular is very clever at findin on-line links to items that will be welcomed and they always are. Clothing is now impossible for them as they like to choose their own. The most unusual gift that one of them wanted was an amethyst crystal. I got quite a large one in a shop which, sadly, has now gone on line.

My two younger grandchildren ages 8 and 12 start looking through the Argos book as soon as November arrives, they find things they'd like and check the price,they know the limit that we set- £50 each - and debate whether it's what they really want. This year they've now said they'd like something new to wear.... So the Next catalogue will now be browsed.., boys!!!!

Chocpudd your sentiments express what I fear. The strange thing is. Is it me? Or do the younger generation seem to go completely bananas at Christmas time? Then no sooner is Christmas finished but folk are going doolally over the sales (half of which is rubbish bought in).
I do admit, I used to go to the sales if there was something I really needed and could get it cheaper. I couldn't believe the scenes at that ghastly Black Friday. I worked in Retail for many years and am so glad I was well out of it before all that.
NicksMrs, that is quite a good idea, we do a small list of a few things we would like/need for a gift,for me mainly books or a DVD and that seems to work quite well. If I'm really stuck I give either giftcard or money. I have a couple of friends I buy for but mainly we keep it small.
Sorry know I'm way off topic here but am heartened that some folk have similar thoughts to my own. I began to think it was perhaps myself not moving with the times.

One day in the future our DGGGG will wonder why we left nothing for them. Everything manufactured has to be grown or dug out of the ground.

Over the years on GN when posters have asked for advice about their selfish ungrateful adult children they always add, "I bought them everything." A child who is given much is called spoilt. Thirty two gifts is stupidity, even half that is way too much. IMO.

My children each had an embroidered (by me) advent calendar with a very small present for each day and a small stocking. They all knew that they would get other presents through the year - a dress they craved in summer, a special backpack for school in September or whatever - so didn't expect huge presents at Christmas. It worked well for us.

I don't think giving children what they feel they need, or what they desperately want, or what you want them to have, is necessarily spoiling them. There are other, more effective, ways to spoil a child. Lack of discipline is one.