Glad I'm NOT a grandparent

Me too Jalima as the (whisper) DGC will be here after lunch.

Two, perhaps three, DGC cuddles for me tomorrow We've all been on separate holidays and boy, have I missed them!

Elegran, you're probably right (bait) and I should have suspected as much, but I am new to this forum myself. Like the Barbra Streisand song "Don't rain on my Parade", I saw someone putting a negative spin on being a grandparent simply because she is not, can't or won't. No one is banned and neither are their comments although it would be nice if we could vote on comments that are deliberately provocative or irritating and this is one of them. It felt wrong ...the kind that is just begging to be nixed.

I wasn't in the least bit interested in being a Gran and my daughter used to say she was very relieved because some of her friends were being put under pressure by their parents to have babies. Then.....she fell in love, married and we now have 2 gorgeous grandsons. We all changed our minds it seems ???

I had to look up the meaning of nixed as I have never heard it before:
www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/nix

For anyone else who doesn't get out much

Thanks jalima thought it was a typo.

Its a good word Willa I shall use it in my next game of scrabble.

JLT I think said that she hailed from Scotland on the welcome site

Good for you bionicwoman!!!

Could we talk about you instead?

Endlessly if that's what you'd like bionicwoman
Where shall we start .....

Why are you googling it? If you are happy why bother seems a little strange to me to

Cherrytree, Jalima.....Cambridge English dictionary clarifies the word 'nix' as American English (I'm from the US), and that it originates from the German word Nicht meaning nothing or for naught. According to Cambridge's definition it means to stop, forbid, or refuse to accept something. Happy to share my new word and that I learned something too in the process!

You are only 60 which is the new 50.So I believe unless you are the mumsy type which and I stand with hands in the air you are in my opinion not so at the present time, but some time in the future you will have a different frame of mind.I too felt like that when I was your age but now as a grand mother I can't get enough of them and watching all the different stages they go through.

Yes - this is a forum fur grandmothers .........

Actually, this is a forum for grandparents OR people of 50 or over.

On this page www.gransnet.com/info/about it says:-
"*What if I'm not a grandmother?
We have a shed for grandads (though we don't insist they stay in there) and lots of topics that are of interest to a wide range of people. So, while the overwhelming majority of our members are grandmothers, we pride ourselves on our inclusiveness."

There are women - and men - on Gransnet who have grandchildren, do not have grandchildren, have children, do not have children, are married, are unmarried, are divorced or widowed. There is no guarantee that grandchildren will not be www.gransnet.com/info/aboutmentioned on any thread that the original poster is reading, but she will find a lot of other conversations too, on subjects from politics to pussycats, and people with a lot to say about everything.

I am glad at times that I do not get to see my DGC. I love them, don't get me wrong, but last time I saw them, the eldest was three and was tearing around like a bull in a China shop, knocking his baby brother over, throwing a Fisher Price telephone at his head and getting away with it. I wasn't as poorly then as I am now so I could imagine what it would be like now with a five year old and a three year old who do not get told off and would not get told to be careful around Granny.

When I did go and visit, I ended up sat on the settee at their flat, just watching them, it was like visiting a zoo. I tried to play with them but they wouldn't come to me. It was always me travelling to see them, she wouldn't make the 45 minute journey on the train with a baby. So they didn't get to see me often enough to make a bond really.

She stopped me seeing them the year before the final time of her withdrawing them from me, for about 4 months. So this time there is no going back as I can't keep getting my heart broke when I do try to make the relationship with them work. I have cut myself off emotionally but maybe, with being ill, it is for the best, like I said, their parents wouldn't tell them to calm down. In fact, the eldest said something hurtful about me last time I was there and my daughter just laughed. I'm better off out of it. But it wouldn't have been my choice had my daughter been the type of person who put her mum in the position I should be in instead of being kicked to the kerb. I would have relished being a grandma, lapping it all up but without the threat of them being taken off me.

Are all your friends the same age as you? I have friends of all ages, quite a lot of young mates and we talk about their kids, or for the ones not yet in relationships we talk about who they fancy or their plans to travel.

Of course my fabulous grand children come in to the conversation at times, but plenty of other things we talk about, my older grand children are grown ups with kids of their own, ad the youngest are still teething and we have Ralar the imaginary friend.......but still, art, theatre, books, travels, work, life in general are topics among us whatever age group.

Not everyone wants kids of course, Ralar told me that very thing just last weekend..........

I do not understand anyone who would keep 2 dogs yet reject their own grandchildren. I have five grandchildren and each one is a treasure. I find it fascinating to see how they develop and I wish they could live closer to me. I do not think it is natural to reject your own flesh and blood.

rubylady I really feel sad for you. You must be bewildered and so must your grandchildren. Do not give up hope. When they are 16 they will be able to make up their own minds whether they want to see you or not....I am sure you will find they will miss you as much as you miss them.

Haven't rft
I would love them and so wouldDDs but neither is in a relationship
I am66 and just hope they arrive before I'm too old (had my children late in life)
But I'm very happpy to talk to my friends about theirs ,admire photos etc .

I fully respect the OP post about not wanting g/children , the same way i respect couples who do not want children, BUT i adore my g/children , thank goodness next week is half term as have 1 G/daughter staying for few days ,whooppeee , i own 3 dogs and we enjoy our walks with dogs , i just hate that g/children are growing up so fast , so i treasure every minute i have with them.

To each their own! I adore my grands but respect the op's feelings. Everybody's different.

I didn't have children (not the maternal type!), however whenever I meet up with my friends I am always happy to look at photos of their grandchildren and hear about their latest exploits and successes. My friends know this and after a while the conversation changes to other things.

Why are you on this forum Sun Seeker, it puzzles me. In no way am I critising you but if I didn't I wouldn't be looking at a grandmothers forum. I have friends who either chose or couldn't have children and all of them have a really strong relationship with their partners and lead very full lives. There lives do seem uncomplicated compared to my family dynamics, I am perhaps not very good at it.. I am glad I did have my family, but have had really wonderful times and a few bad ones, but thats life.

I don't have grandchildren, yet. I feel a bit out of it when with 2 close friends, and they are discussing their very full lives with their grandchildren. They keep it to a minimum though, and we talk about lots of other subjects. I would love to be a Gran, you are all very lucky. I was not very maternal when younger, had my first child at 35, so if I'm ever lucky enough to be a Gran, it's a shame that I'll be an older Grannie and not such an active one. Nothing I can do about it, would certainly never drop hints, I just enjoy and am proud of my boys. OP does sound a little bitter and unhappy. Why would you post that?

Luckylegs I am on this forum because it is for people over a certain age, not just grandmothers (in fact I understand even men are welcome!) When you don't have children you are often excluded from many things, do you want to exclude me from here too? As for having a strong relationship with partners, my DH and I had a long wonderful and happy marriage but he died 6 years ago - are you suggesting just because I didn't have children I should shut myself away in some kind of purdah? I am happy for those who had children/grandchildren and as I have said I am always pleased for them when they boast about their exploits but it just wasn't for me.