Grandsons dad seems to be drifting away.

Could it be that he is trying to please the new girlfriend who will not want her social life cramped by a toddler? It may change when he moves on again.
Try not to stress about it. If he doesn't want contct it's his loss but sadly also your grandson's until he is old enough to know what's really going on.

Legs55
Don't worry my husband gets his own back almost every night......snoring till the windows rattle. Think I'll give those ear defenders a try!!!!
Many thanks to everyone for your words of wisdom & support. ?

All I can add is that I have a friend who insisted when their child was very young that he took his turn in child care after they were separated. The boy child is now in his 20s but his mum said that her insisting his dad had him as a small child has resulted in the boy and father having a close relationship.

Your daughter is lucky to have a mum and role model like you. Some may disagree but I truly don't think that men , in the main, have it in them to make the same calibre of parent as women do.

Nanna58 I think you are very wrong,there are as many great dads as mums , and loads of men who would love to be allowed to see more of their children are denied access,my son has at least three friends in the situation where they are having to go to court to see their children,there are a lot of spiteful young women out there too,who if they dont get their own way make life very difficult for their ex partners/childrens fathers.I dont like to generalise ,ever,about people ,but I have seen this from the young fathers side and I see a constant hand out for cash ,hundreds of pounds for christmas presents,birthday parties ,the last one involved 15 kids and ponies and cost a fortune,and of course the yearly cry of she needs clothes ofr her holidays so another few hundred pounds ,this despite him having the child the same number of days as the mum,providing her with clothes shoes toys etc while she's with him ,AND paying a weekly sum to her mother.Some girls really need to look at reality BEFORE they have kids ,but then they repeat the same mistake over and over again.At least my son has been sensible in the 7 years since they split and there are no other little ones to be held to ransom over .

I don't agree with you Nanna58. DH drives over 280 miles every weekend to collect the children on Saturday and return them on Sunday. We also go to every open evening, class assembly, etc. even if the event only lasts a few minutes. If the event is in the morning we have to leave home at 6am to make sure we get through the traffic to arrive in time.

I used to live on a really rough council estate where the lads in their teens and early twenties were tough but every weekend you would see them pushing buggies and discussing the merits of Barbie with their little girls and mates. These were the type of lads that the media would have us believe get girls pregnant then walk away.

There are dads who walk and don't care but a lot more fight tooth and nail and do whatever it takes to see their children.

I've seen both types, My ex was useless and did very little, but I'm proud of my DS who has kept a great relationship with his son. I think he realised how much a dad is needed. My own dad was great when my son's were young and did many of the dad things with them. They still talk about the games they played with grandad and he died 14 years ago. Some men are useless some men are great.

Gosh, I'm in tears reading all these stories. I can never understand how anyone can neglect their own children, knowing how much I love mine with all my heart. I now have a beautiful granddaughter of 2 years 5 months (my only grandchild so far) who I love so much and she is adored by everyone.

My own father left home when I was 7, the youngest of 3 children. I had a brother and sister. He went off with someone and had two daughters with her. After 10 years they parted and he then married an American woman and they did not have children. So he had 5 children he never saw. He was married to the American woman for over 30 years.

He never paid any maintenance and it was really hard for my mum, and we didn't have much in the way of money or possessions, but were rich in love. We never saw him after he left, until my sister traced him and he came and visited for a couple of weeks. This was 35 years after he left!

My mother and him were like chalk and cheese and just not suited to each other, but that is no excuse for cutting us out of his life. They were too young when they got together, he was only 20 when my brother was born and was 2 years younger than my mother (it was a shotgun wedding!) I often wonder if they would have married if my mum hadn't been pregnant. It was 1947 then, so very different from what things are like nowadays.

What about the other set of grandparents? Have they never asked for contact with your little grandson? I always made it very clear to my boys that any relationship that produced a child meant a lifelong commitment from them and from us. I would never have abandoned a grandchild. It's beyond my understanding. I've been in the position of not being allowed access by my daughters waste of space partner. When he realised he couldn't control her through the children he simply abandoned them.We played the long game and picked up the pieces, but what I don't get is his family just lost interest and never contacted her boys again. To be honest it made life easier but that's not the point. I also have a step granddaughter (I find it hard to use that phrase we never ever say or even think of her as anything but ours) who's mother was abandoned before the birth. She was never acknowledged by any of the family even though they lived on the same street as them. Well it's been their loss she's just the most beautiful loving girl who given us great joy and we love her more than words could say. At 15/ 16 she insisted on being adopted by my son so she could share our name. We always say this son has four children because he has, just as we have 8 grandchildren. All loved and treated equally. I know this grandparenting business can be hard work nora I've given up longing for an orderly home. I feel as if I've been standing on bits of lego since 1976 but really it's worth it. All that wonderful love and mess.