Could this be some kind of sibling rivalry or jealousy?

My eldest daughter loves having things that she had as a child for her children to have but my youngest wants all new for her children. The only thing that my three children and my six grandchildren have shared is a gorgeous wicker crib on a stand. It will be used by my great grandchildren next...smiles

My DD donated most of DGD No 1's clothes to a project in Africa dear to my and DM's heart as she had no room to keep them. She now has DGD no 2 (there is nearly a 5 year gap between the two) and will probably do the same this time around unless she has another baby and it's another DGD (obviously not yet as DGD No 2 is just a month old)

I would just offer them to the daughter who is expecting saying would you like to have a look through these baby clothes to see if there is anything you would like but no problem if not, I'll take them to the charity shop.

National Childbirth Trust hold nearly new sales open to everyone.

Dire not direct

If your pregnant daughter doesn't want the things you have there are now places like food banks but for clothes for families in direct straights that can't afford charity shops. Just a thought..... congratulations ?

I still have the cot and soft top pram from my children. I doubt they will want the pram now as things are so different these days but they live away so I will keep it for when they visit, a baby can at least sleep in it. The cot I hope one of them would want as it's a nice carved wooden one.
We have a local recycling group in Chelmsford and there are always baby items being offered and asked for so if your second daughter really doesn't want things, I am sure you will find a good home for them. Just make sure she knows she won't hurt your feelings by saying no.

My daughter is happy and grateful for new or second hand clothes and toys for her children but will only put her daughters in clothes she likes and that is her choice as they are HER children. So some of the stuff I kept in store from when they were little or items I bought in sales in preparation for having grandchildren she took and some she didn't. What's there to be offended about! I wouldn't wear anything I didn't like. However, I know her tastes so I am fairly secure when I buy things for the grandchildren that they will be liked. The only time I was sad when was she wouldn't take a dress her own godmother has bought for her for after hee Christening as she thought the neck was too tight but it didn't go to waste as it went on a doll!!

Congratulations on the new arrival, hope you have a lovely, healthy grandchild. Pleased to say my DD and DiL often look in charity shops and on eBay. DD had our first DGC, can't believe he's 10 this month, and we bought fairly expensive Bugaboo, pram/ buggy combo - which was never used much as DD usually had them in a sling whilst babies then walking or on a scooter or bike after that. DDiL was very happy to have it for her two - although I offered a new one, and now my niece has made good use of it, her second still in it. That's what I call value.
In our area there is a charity called Baby Basics who provide for Mums to be who are in need, a Moses basket ot baby bath is filled with nappies, clothes (can be 2nd hand if in good condition) and other items for baby and a few treats for Mum too, if there's one in your area I'm sure they'd be glad of any donations.
This poor planet of ours is in crisis, people getting rid of perfectly good stuff just because they can is consumerism gone mad in my opinion.

When I offered my D her wn old clothes, which were pretty posh and expensive when new she said 'no thanks'. Now it is all 'have you kept my stuff it's vintage you know'.I had kept a few more unusual bits.

We love charity shops and e bay and she donates on Freecycle toys and equipment.Re cycling whatever way it's done is the way to go.

I so long to see our Rose in her mother's things but think she will look at them and think nannie is mad and just use them for dressing up.

Why on earth are you asking the daughter who isn't pregnant and not the one who is?

Forgot to say, CONGRATULATIONS! Enjoy the new baby and don't worry about your daughters falling out. That is their business not yours so don't get dragged in. No doubt you love them both and you do not want to be used as pig in the middle treading on egg shells. I hope your daughter has an easy birth xxx BIG HUGS!

Grannybags. You got it in one.

Simple. Say no more after that.

Difficult one, but I would offer them and if she doesn't want them then give them to a charity shop. I ordered a cot buffer for one of my dil's when she was pregnant and she said they were old fashioned so I gave them to Oxfam. No doubt they will make good use of them. Everything helps. Make sure she knows they are not second hand, some people have a problem with passing on germs to babies.

I am thankful that my daughters are not precious about what their children inherit or acquire from charity shops/eBay for their children. My DIL is quite different and wouldn't even go in cheaper stores for hers.

But my friend's DD took the biscuit, getting rid of all her baby stuff when pregnant with her second and buying everything again new because she didn't want the second baby (same sex) to be treated differently from her older sibling who had everything brand new. Out went the Moses basket, bouncing chair and all. Certainly not very wealthy either.

icbn in your situation I would ask DD2 directly but expect her to say no and be pleased if she proves her sister wrong. Then just get on with enjoying exciting times ahead.

One of my daughters has a one and only and she has given everything from crib onwards to our local woman's refuge. When the girls eventually get rehoused they need everything for their babies. Failing that there are charity shops and anything unwanted which is too big for charity shops we Freecycle.

Congratulations on the new baby. I would just say I'm taking all these things to the charity shop, is there anything you would like before it goes.

What is the problem, when the new baby is born, ask your daughter if she would like the clothes/equipment?
I understand your query though, you don't know why your other daughter would be so
Emphatic about her sister 'not wanting them'.
There is often rivalry with siblings, so it could be the case, or may just be that she thinks her sister would want 'all brand new' things.
Either way, don't worry about it.

Ask her wether she would like the baby things. If she says no, then take them to a charity shop, or do what my DD did with all her baby stuff. She sold them on eBay in batches. Their family was complete (four children), so there was no point in keeping them.

Congratulations on the coming gb (grandbaby)!

But I'm not sure why you're asking one dd (dear daughter) about offering baby bits to the other? Did she buy them originally or were they items you purchased for your home for her convenience or in case of emergencies? Did you ever tell her they were hers/gs's only or did you say they were for any gc who came to your home?

No matter. Even if they were hers, she chose to give them up, so now they're yours. I feel as if you're asking her permission to offer them to the expectant mum when you don't have to. What are you hoping she'll say? "Great idea!" Obviously, she's not going to, whether it's because she really doesn't like handmedowns or because of sibling rivalry. Really, like pps, I think you should just offer them to the expectant mum and see what she says. If she wants them, great! If not, you can give them to a charity or whatever you want.

Enjoy that gb!

Most of DS's son's clothes are 4th hand, having already been worn by his two cousins and DD's daughter's best friend's daughter. Certainly all the boys would have been very short of clothes without eBay.

Sometimes it is useful to have some back up clothes, toys equipment at your own house for emergency situstions. Have to say I think passed on within a family is different from brought second hand. Young parents are very lucky if they can afford everything new, many can not.

I agree with tanith, if your daughter doesn't want the baby things then a charity shop will be glad of them. Don't over think things.
Enjoy the new baby and don't worry.

I am not sure you are overthinking but I don't think it is anything to worry about. I have felt the same sort of thing between two of my daughters when the latest grandchild arrived, maybe a little worry that I would love the new grandchild more than the others. of course, you and I know that it is nonsense, that we love them all the same, but maybe sisters never quite grow out of that rivalry. They still love each other dearly though. I would accept that we only children don't quite understand, but that it is nothing to worry about.

Congratulations on the forthcoming new babies x i would just keep the things you have , there have been many a time when my GC were little and have been at my house and there has been the need for clean clothes and something spilt on their clothes or some other reason , or when they are older a change of clothes needed to be out in garden, its amazing also what parents sometimes forget when they come for a visit with little ones, thankfully my daughter has never told me not to give children second hand clothes or toys ,i always make sure they are clean ,

I think you are overthinking this and seeing problems that more than likely only exist to you. Just offer them and the do whatever you need to do with them.