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Grandparenting

Could this be some kind of sibling rivalry or jealousy?

(36 Posts)
icbn2802 Tue 14-Mar-17 12:58:26

I recently learnt that I'm to become a nana for the 2nd time. I still have a few baby bits stored in my spare bedroom-daughter said she didn't want them, claiming her son would be her one & only child. Now my other daughter is expecting I've been aaking the mum of the 3 year old whether it's worth keeping hold of these 'bits' for when her sister has her baby. On each occasion she's basically saying 'no-I doubt she'd want it' not a hint of a suggestion that it's an idea even worth considering. I must admit its stumped me a bit. And I'm not even sure how I should feel & indeed what to do with these baby bits, trying to have a ruthless & long overdue declutter.
Do I just get rid & say no more or offer these bits to the expectant mum? Feel a bit torn to be honest but don't want to get it wrong.

meandashy Thu 16-Mar-17 12:49:08

If your pregnant daughter doesn't want the things you have there are now places like food banks but for clothes for families in direct straights that can't afford charity shops. Just a thought..... congratulations ?

meandashy Thu 16-Mar-17 12:49:40

Dire not direct confused

Elrel Thu 16-Mar-17 16:23:04

National Childbirth Trust hold nearly new sales open to everyone.

chrissyh Thu 16-Mar-17 18:12:46

I would just offer them to the daughter who is expecting saying would you like to have a look through these baby clothes to see if there is anything you would like but no problem if not, I'll take them to the charity shop.

NannyKasey Thu 16-Mar-17 19:06:54

My DD donated most of DGD No 1's clothes to a project in Africa dear to my and DM's heart as she had no room to keep them. She now has DGD no 2 (there is nearly a 5 year gap between the two) and will probably do the same this time around unless she has another baby and it's another DGD (obviously not yet as DGD No 2 is just a month old)

Theoddbird Thu 16-Mar-17 21:52:50

My eldest daughter loves having things that she had as a child for her children to have but my youngest wants all new for her children. The only thing that my three children and my six grandchildren have shared is a gorgeous wicker crib on a stand. It will be used by my great grandchildren next...smiles smile

Pussycat777 Sat 30-Aug-25 20:52:34

Hi i have 6 grandchildren im so sad my two eldest grandaughters have fallen out they are 13 but now one of them messages the other saying horrible nasty things about her and the family .my son has spoken to his brother telling him whats going on but hes not interestedhe said hes not going to speak to her about it hes not bothered by the bad things being said .i feel in the middle as they both involve me ! What should i do ? All the nastiness is making me ill we were we were all very close but it seems the families are now at loggerheads with me in the middle.

Ziplok Sat 30-Aug-25 21:11:28

Just ask your other daughter if she would like them. She’ll either say yes, please or no, thank you. If she doesn’t want them, donate them to a charity as suggested, but give her the option of first refusal. Stress that you won’t mind either way.

sodapop Sat 30-Aug-25 22:04:53

This thread is 8 years old, the children will be at school now.

Witzend Sat 30-Aug-25 22:24:42

I don’t understand the aversion to 2nd hand. My dd and her friends all pass everything around, clothes and toys. I remember a pair of M&S dungarees I bought for Gdd1 when she started crawling - they eventually went to 2 other friends before coming back for Gds. OK, a bit faded, but still perfectly wearable.