Was this you yesterday?

Wonder what she would have said if you had replied that you had explosive diarrhoea? ?

Jane I too have had a small child crawl beneath a door but in a motorway services with none too clean floor. It got dragged back by the ankles as I started to speak to it and an appology shouted through to me. Made me smile.

How many of you have wrestled with the arabic squat loo? I was doing some aid work in a dangerous country with a group of western volunteers, and government hosts. Didn't know the way to keep knickers dry is to swing one leg out of it and hold knickers well away,keep it on the side or take off completely. Result - wet knickers and long drive before important meeting. I hastily washed them and as I was sitting next to the driver discreetly (I thought) held them out of the window to dry in the wind. Honking from the army escort behind, driver thought warning rebel ambush, drove us off the road in panic. Red face, translator had to explain, mortified me slunk into seat STILL wet knickers this time on, so to add to shame left wet patch on seat at parliament... not one of my finest hours!

Out on a day trip with my son when he was nine, we both decided we needed the loo. He went running through one door and I through the second door. only to crash into each other, then realising the lady's had two doors. We just couldn't stop laughing over it. Our shocked expressions must have been a picture.

My DH has a thing about Loo paper - he thinks I use way too much !

So when he passed by and heard the Loo Roll holder spinning round he said... " Sure you've got enough or shall I get you another roll " ??

Imagine his face when one of my friends emerged !

The one good thing to be said for the Arabic toilet, which can still be found in France is the pleasure of not having to having to hover above a seat used by all and sundry and probably left in an insanitary condition.

The exercise is a great deal easier if you just don't bother with underpants and wear skirts that are long enough to conceal the fact that you aren't wearing underpants.

Anyone know how women in a sari manage? I still haven't worked that one out. Or Muslim men for that matter, as they are brought up to squat when weeing, not stand.

Aww peaches....there is always worse....can always remember sitting in a large meeting room with a circle of pre-school educators awaiting a rather intensive course to start. Tutors in place and they were checking watches to make sure it was official time to start. In marched the late comer (all courses have one). She was flustered and clutching folders and loudly apologising...as she strode over to the last remaining empty seat in full view of everyone a tampon applicator fell out the bottom of her trousers!

I’ve just been reading a thread on mumsnet about similarly embarrassing things said by children - hilarious!

In a rather upmarket department store, my friend’s little boy said very loudly “Oh Mummy, you haven’t got a willy, can I see where your wee wee comes out?”
Exit one very red-faced mummy. He did however grow up to be a doctor!

That really made me laugh.

When my daughter was about five we were in a department store loo when she proudly announced that she had done ‘two bits!’
Rather red faced Mum emerged to a round of applause from the queue.?

Oh the joys of having to take the little ones into the cubicle with you! Mind you was easier for me....had girls!

Yes peaches50, I had an incident with an Arabic squat loo. I had never come across them before until stopping in Kuala Lumpa to change planes. I made a pigs ear of it. My knickers got caught in the cross fire, and I removed them. My dark linen trousers had a horribly visible streak of misfired wee on one leg. Mortified ,I had no alternative but to brave it out and joined the security check queue. My discomfort and embarrassment must have looked like evasive guilt to the tough security policewoman standing to one side of the queue. I was abruptly called out of the queue to stand and have a much too public pat down - bet she was sorry!

Ha ha Peaches. Great story!

Some great stories here, made me laugh . Family folklore has it that once in a swimming pool changing room, Mum getting sorted out, me all dressed and dried and sitting watching a large woman struggling into her clothes, that awful way when your clothes stick to half dried skin.......I piped up ' ^My, your having a struggle there missus^ in my serious 3 year old way.

In my teens, out with the girls wearing my new light grey all-in -one jumpsuit, the top half slipped from my grasp in the loo and I wee'd on the sleeve.
I washed it in the washbasin and partly dried it on the roller towel, but had to go back in to the pub with one dark sleeve .

I was also out with my 2 year old in a department store to turn and find him wee'ing in a display toilet.

We lived in America for a while and I was called in by the Head Teacher shortly after my daughters started at their school because my elder daughter, aged 8, had been caught talking to her friend who was on the toilet and had been 'looking' under the door.

I said, 'Oh, all the girls in England go in the cubicle together to chat all the time'. She was not amused that I did not take it seriously and suggested I should take my daughter to see a 'shrink'- she didn't use that word but implied it. My daughter now aged 40 and I still chat while we are on the loo with the door open ( at home that is) but have been known to share a toilet cubicle when out and about.

Great stories!
Has anyone else had to use a ‘squat’ , hole in the floor loo while on a moving train? It is an interesting experience! Luckily I did know to remove underwear first.
And for the first few rears of my elder daughter’s life we only had that type of loo at home. And she always removed her knicks before going in, leaving them outside the door. I lost count of the times I took her out without any pants as she hadn’t put them back on.

granmac your typo error of ^first few rears of my elder daughter's life^ was pertinent!

I'm sure I read somewhere that squat position is much better for the pelvic floor than our usual one.

I once came out of my cubicle and my son, then aged about 5, proudly told me that he'd washed his hands but couldn't get the dryer to work. No wonder-he was trying to dry his hands at the Tampax machine.

GillT57
. I really need to get my eyes sorted!

Great stories here and I have enjoyed reading them. I don't really have much of a story, but when I took our eldest granddaughter, aged about 4, shopping, she said she needed the loo. So using the facilities of a big store, in we went. Unfortunately, it wasn't very fragrant, and she clapped her hands over her face and rushed out again saying "I can't go in there". She then managed without a loo until we got home.

Auntieflo- I think we all understood that situation!