Grandchildren and Christmas gifts

Having said that, I was touched that both my DDs gave their children a nudge to send us facebook messages on Christmas morning.

This was to buck us up because we were feeling a bit down due to a family problem elsewhere which is not of our making but we've been caught in the crossfire.

Familes, eh?

I don't give our adult DGCs pocket money, especially at 18 and 21 which are the ages of the two DGSs who live next door. I think your DGC's reply to you was considerate though and it's good that they realise your feelings were hurt.

Don't worry too much about your DD's reaction. They don't like it when they discover they've been by-passed.

They say that grannies and their grandchildren have a common enemy......The mother!

I would never ever ask for a present off anyone and actually think it’s pretty poor to make grandkids feel guilty because they haven’t bought you one At 18 and 21 I doubt you would still be giving pocket money. two of my grandkids give me cards and small presents although not sure that ll continue when they are not at home (it might but I m not expecting it to They re funny when my grandson went over seas with the scouts he completely lost his mums present and mine was a bit strange, he thought he’d bought me a thin leather necklace but he’d bought me a string that your glasses go on ??? but he tried. My others who live away just piggy back on their mum and dads cards and presents
It is what it is I don’t lose sleep over it and I don’t give to them in expectation of getting it back
Kids are naturally self centred

I hope I haven't killed this thread.

Sorry about the rant. I think I must have been bottling that up. ?

I think children should be brought up to think of others, starting with their Granny and Grandad. And Nannie because I don't suppose she got anything either.

Oh, and we take them on holiday.

I should have previewed. Isa's not Isla's.

Me too! In fact, I had a bit of a barney with DD when she was telling me how elder GS, now doing weekend work, had brought presents for them all. I ask he couldn't have bought just a little something for me. DD was amazed, until I pointed out how I pay pocket money into their accounts, fill their Isla's each year, pay for school trips and God knows what else. She was quite put out. In fact, I think there was a little bit of "going no-contact" for a while after Xmas, until I told her to not be so daft. (I was ^not going to let happen^)
(sodding Mmsnet )

Today 's families are insular. They don't think outside their own little group.

I can’t imagine ever asking someone for a present, no matter how gently worded. Or telling someone that I felt sad because they hadn’t sent me a present. I think the only presents worth having are those which are given freely.

I’m not sure why the OP is withdrawing pocket money from her granddaughters given her description of their replies.

I do sympathise. I without fail send cards and transfer cash (at their request via their mum) to my 2 nephews every Christmas and birthday. They're 15 and 18 now and not once have they acknowledged their gift. It's like it disappears into a black hole.

I don't want them to buy me a gift, I'd just like a thank you! I very nearly said something this year. But, for the sake of family harmony I didn't. It does grate somewhat though...

Probably a knee jerk reaction to being in the wrong Lemonlegs it does seem that such small gestures which are important to us are not considered by some adult children.