Is it generational or am I remembering it wrong?

I hate to have to revert to stereotypes, but it may just be a 'boy' thing. He'll grow out of it soon.

Take his dirty clothes away when he is in bed so he has to put clean ones on when he gets up.

Teenage boys? Grief yes! I had two boys and two girls. What a difference. I would clear the shelves of bread, milk and cereals. They were never full??. It actually used to put me off eating, they ate so much. They had pizza plates for dinner. Normal plates just weren’t big enough. I was so grateful for the girls. I had friends with four boys ?. At least he’ll go home and your cupboards will be safe again??

Not sure why some teenage boys dislike teeth cleaning. As for snacking in between, children are bombarded with junk food adverts, and boys do seem to need a lot of stoking nowadays, perhaps because they are not very active, unless sporty of course, therefore bored, or have a lack of self control, to say he eats because he is stressed is surely due to not addressing the issue, and letting him gorge away to his hearts content, although you say he has lots of medical issues. Unfortunately we live in a world where kids are indulged and they live to eat, not eat to live. Too much temptation every day. Very difficult to alter eating habits if parents just indulge, because it’s easy. Harsh I know, but have seen it happen so often .

Brought back memories of my son when a teenager who would easily eat a loaf of bread in a day. Cups grew mould in his bedroom. Them were the days! Now at 35 he is a vegetarian and careful about his food intake, but his cups are still mouldy!

Some of it depends on the parents, my children weren’t allowed juice or fizzy, except as a treat, GC’s have the same rules from their Mum, plenty of water.
My son at that age could eat, three good meals a day, snacks the odd packet of crisps or fruit, just didn’t have the other stuff in the house. Similarly the GC’s, both here and at their home, treats at the weekend.

Things have definitely changed , As a child we never snacked, three good meals a day and that was it. My Dad would very occasionally bring me and my siblings a sugar mouse each when he returned from work - such a treat!! I brought my children up in a similar pattern but my GC seem to graze throughout the day!
You are doing a great job , well done !

It sounds about normal from what I have gleaned about teen boys.
It's exhausting!

I am in absolute awe at your persistence.

Over the years of encountering difficult situations/people, I now prefer to walk away. Just can’t be arsed with other people’s problems and difficult behaviours.

I think if left with me I’d probably pack myself a small suitcase and stay in a caravan for the duration and leave dgs of 15 years to his own devices.

Does he treat his parent’s home the same way regarding mess?
Ten cans of juice? Do you mean fizzy drinks? That’s ridiculous and very bad for him.
As for showering mine had a bath or shower every day, completely non negotiable. I never remember either of them trying to skip bathing it was simply a routine.
I suggest you feed him more at mealtimes, double the carbs (unless he is putting on two much weight) and give sandwiches between meals if he is still hungry. Crisps, biscuits, sweets and chocolate aren’t filling and are bad for him providing empty calories.
You are doing such a nice thing for him but he is not respecting you. I hope things gets better

Gosh, my two bots never stopped eating as teenagers despite me providing good home cooked meals for them. I had a limited budget so they filled up on toast and supermarket brand cereals as they were cheap. My eldest boy could easily eat two or three loaves a day! He grew to be 6 ft 7 so didn’t do badly on that diet! I could not afford to buy fizzy drinks, sweets, biscuits etc other than as occasional treats if on special offer. When I was working, I kept all these treat snacks in the boot of my car so they weren’t scoffed while I was out!

I can relate to this post quite well. My son at 15 was a nightmare, couldn’t see why he had to wash in or clean his teeth in the mornings as he had only been asleep. It’s at this age where you just have to bring in tough love and consequences. First, stop the crisps etc., give him 3 good filling meals a day and a snack and drink for bedtime. Take no nonsense, your house, your rules.

Not all my boys have been as bad as this but one of mine in particular was just like this so yes, it can be quite normal. They need over 3,000 calories a day by the way! and they can sleep for England. The one who was the worst in in his 20s now showers several times a day, his body is a temple, he as vain as they come and brushes his teeth and is kind and thoughtful. It passes

Teacheranne, I remember coming home from work many, many times and ingredients for tea being eaten!

I've had that too.
They've been made into a sandwich!

As a mum of 2 boys (now in their 30s) I can sympathise! They were constantly hungry - but instead of crisps and biscuits, I gave them toasted sandwiches (cheese/ham/poached egg etc) or they had a bowl of cereal. Try giving your GS milk instead of juice/fizzy drinks. Luckily my lads didn't have a very sweet tooth, but I do remember hiding crisps and my favourite chocolate only to forget about them and find them months later all out of date! It sounds to me like your GS needs a girlfriend - one sure way to get him to improve his habits, he'll never be out of the shower and will spend hours washing his teeth!

Yes teenage boys! before I had my children I had a taster via having French students for a while (boys) that was an eye opener. Their appetites were insatiable. A learning curve as as to what to expect from young growing males as far as food consumption was concerned at any rate.

In our old house all the bedrooms had en suites, I remember my then teenage son, admitting to a relative who was giving our house the once over, "whilst he was lucky having his own en suite shower room, he didn't have a strong relationship with soap and water so it wasn't that important to him" but that changed once girls came on the scene and he is quite fastidious now. Yeah a bit grimy for a while, his older brother much fussier regarding his appearance being a few years his senior often referred to him as "the tramp" but grunge was something to take a pride in back then and he seemed to have forgotten it was a well trodden path he'd been down himself!

Things seemed to have changed a lot, my grandchildren, three of whom live with us, could eat all day, I say to my daughter, if we don’t buy it, they can’t eat it, but still the cupboard always seems to be full of junk.
The same with showering and tooth brushing, they are constantly having to be nagged, I really can’t understand it.
I won’t buy fizzy drinks unless it’s some sort of occasion, but one of my husbands niggles is that they constantly pour out glasses of juice, but never actually drink it.
They are incapable of putting a wrapper in the bin, school bags and kit are just dropped as they walk in.
I can’t just nag all the time, but I do despair at times, so, Poohbear, I feel your pain.

I'm afraid that this all sounds very familiar to me as well!

My brother would fill a cake mixing bowl with cereal and a pint of milk when he got home from school. My Mum would say, "You'll spoil your tea" and he'd just roll his eyes ?

My two sons could also polish off a loaf of bread a day in addition to their normal meals.
My husband used to complain if I gave them more roast potatoes than him; he couldn't accept that they were still growing.

The only thing I'd query is the number of cans of drinks your grandson is getting through, especially if they're fizzy drinks.

Regarding his room... best not to get too agitated by it. Open the windows and shut the door worked best for me!
I used to strip the beds and leave the clean sheets and duvet covers out, though it might have taken a few days before they got round to putting them on.
As for the collection of rubbish in his room, I'd suggest the night before dustbin day you take an empty laundry basket up and get him to fill it and bring it down.

I think to a certain extent teenagers live parallel lives to the rest of us. They have so much going on in their heads and their bodies and at school.
They do come through and out the other side though, we just have to be patient and not sweat the small stuff while we're waiting for them to emerge ?

I've got teenage grandson permanently due to issues with his stepfather. The food thing is pretty typical I think, I have to hide stuff but I think it wasn't an issue with my own sons as I couldn't afford to have lots of snacks in so they weren't tempted. I'm not prepared to stop buying things that my husband likes and I like so some things get hidden.

Count your blessings with the shower, I wish I had to nag GS. Mine seems to live in the shower, he's been here for a couple of months and I dread to think what the next water bill will be, long showers twice a day and an endless pile of wet towels. I'm trying to persuade him that he doesn't need to use 3 towels and you can actually hang a towel up and use it more than once.

That is a constant cause of upset here.
As an authority on everything, my boy informs me that it's dirty to use a bath towel more than once.

MissAdventure

That is a constant cause of upset here.
As an authority on everything, my boy informs me that it's dirty to use a bath towel more than once.

I think 3 towels twice a day is ridiculous. I keep telling him if he wants to have a planet when he's older he better start looking after it.

Mine is constantly in the bathroom, but doesn't seem to actually go near water during that time, luckily (I think!)
When he does, it's like a tidal wave when he gets out.

I have girls, but these behaviors aren't unusual for them as well. I FINALLY won the bathing battle, but it is a fight to get her to brush her teeth daily. She also eats ALL THE TIME.

The behavior in the OP is exactly how my nephew has been. I think this is "normal" teen boy behavior. Not sure how past generations were though. It seemed pretty normal in my teenaged years in the 80's.

Teenage boys are a joy aren't they.