9 o’clock birthday invitation!

It sounds as though the parents haven't really thought of how this timing will present problems for people who have to travel.

That said I'd just go with it. I'm sure you'll all have a wonderful time and the early start will be worth it. Afterwards you'll have the whole day to yourselves to enjoy.

Thank your for answering @Coastpath :-) But, besides the travelling time, what are your toughts about the world spinning around the needs of ONE child? I’m not in some kind of hetz here, I just think that it’s worth discussing how much we have to adjust to Project children. In a kind, inspirational way, to learn, to get wiser. I am happy and proud to be a Grandmother - but I am also much more than that.

Oh my goodness, Karen, that’s an early start for you! I think this might be something the parents will look back on in future years as a funny family story, as in “What on earth were we thinking?”.

Seems absurd to me. I assume the child is the birthday child so it isn't surprising that the focus is on him/her, but 3 is surely old enough to be flexible over day time routines. Is party food to be eaten at 9 o'clock in the morning?

Whether you go or not is a different thing, and I daresay you will have no real say in the matter.... Bad luck!

Can you go the evening before and stay overnight?

Thank your for answering @Coastpath :-) But, besides the travelling time, what are your toughts about the world spinning around the needs of ONE child?

The world spinning around one child on that child's birthday doesn't seem over the top to me. Will it matter if you arrive a little bit late to the party? Leaving your home at 0800 doesn't strike me as particularly early, but of course I don't know your normal sleeping/getting up situation

You could just not go if it's such a problem.

Are you able to stay somewhere over night?
Personally I wouldn’t miss any grandchild’s birthday. I have heard of Breakfast birthdays before to fit in with parents routines & different croissants, pastries, cereals and toast seem to be the food offered and of course coffee for the mums.
As for families being child centred that’s their business and not one we should particularly question.
I hope you have a happy time celebrating.

Think I would simply pass on the celebration.

I wonder what time this child has his/her nap, and I wonder when everyone will be packed off and sent home? If I were you I'd leave home at whatever time suited me and arrive late, and as (I assume) you are a grandparent there's nothing to stop you from staying on late and helping with the napping routine.
However, the child will be so hyped up on party excitement and sugar, he/she won't be in the mood for a nap - good luck with that!

Not sure how old you are but I think I would simply turn up, you can always sit down when you get there. The other alternative is to book into a hotel for the night before and make a holiday of it.

I would make a wee break of it - book into a B & B, pop in with his presents the day before, enjoy the party and drive home in the afternoon. If DGS is at his best in the mornings, then it is sensible to have his party then.

I can't help getting the feeling that the OP's objection arises because the child is not her grandchild.

Perhaps your husband could go on his own, Karen?

Despite the timing if it was my grandchild I wouldn’t want to miss their party. As it is his grandchild have you asked your DH how he feels and if he wants to go? Depending on his answer I would make excuses or travel the day before and stop somewhere overnight. I would leave the decision and the response to him.

I would go because it’s your family but arrive a bit later no excuses. The child’s priorities come first which is not always practical for guests. I always had a small party for my children with just their friends being dropped and picked up. My parents were both not well and other family were working.

We have been invited to parties (not by our own children) at bizarre times. Even when working running a business being expected to lose business for parties.
Early afternoon tea parties for toddlers or burger afternoons for teens but we gave them a miss.

We sometimes had breakfast get togethers for the family on our DDs bitrthdays... for grandparents & any child free uncles etc. Then we might take the kids out somewhere or have their friends round for a children's party. Have no idea what time I would have said but know I would have been up by 6 at least!

If a child has a fixed routine I can see some sense in working round it..nobody wants a tried and grumpy child not able to have a nap just because it is a birthday!

I think it is probably sensible, when celebrating a young child's birthday , to make sure it is at a time when they & guests will be able to enjoy it! Whether 9 a.m. is the only time that can happen is another question but that is his parent's choice!

9 am birthday parties for toddlers are pretty normal in my area. They do all tend to take late morning to early afternoon naps at this age.

When life is centred around a child I think they grow up thinking they are the centre of the universe. I do not agree with seen and not heard but a healthy balance is needed.

Weighing up a child missing a nap for one day against the inconvenience for the people the parents want to attend the birthday I think they have got it wrong.

My son used to have a nap in the afternoon still at 3 and I found it just as easy for him to go for his nap at the usual time , while the rest of us carried on with the party - it was just easier as without that nap, he was the kid from hell later on!
There are ways that the GC parents could get round the nap time, by bringing it early by up to an hour, bit by bit on the build up to the party, but as they want to stick to a routine, it's there choice!
9am for a party is a bit early for me - hope they are providing brunch rather than the usual party food, but as it is their child, their home, it's their choice .
Perhaps you could travel the day before and stay in a hotel or bed and breakfast overnight, then why not get together for lunch with the other guests before travelling home ?

I think the parents routines could be a bit precious! Children adapt.

? to you Karen. Your English is really good.

I'm afraid I would apologise and say a 4 a.m. start is just too much for you. Wish them a lovely day and that you look forward to seeing them soon.

If you're in a position to go down the day before and stay the night (incurring that expense) then that is always a choice you can make.

A friend of mine holds a breakfast birthday party for her son, whose birthday is on Christmas Eve, and the early timing is greatly appreciated by families with a great deal to do.

Hello Karen. I think it’s unusual fir a 3 year old to have a morning nap but that is not the point really.
I would go, be a little late if it’s too early for you. The other guests will have to make the same choice so it’s not just aimed at you.
As for todays children and their every need being central to everything, this seems to be how it works now, wherever you live. When my children were young they were important of course but not to the extent they are now.
Go and enjoy.

I find it really irritating that a nap or daytime sleep has become napping! Horses can have a spate of napping not people!! I imagine this came from the USA - like "for free" instead of free.