Hi, I am a 61 year old grampa with a wonderful 4 year old gs. GS has been acting out a lot lately, very cranky, having bathroom accidents and can be very nasty to my wife (not his natural grandma) and grampa has to do everything. This upsets my wife a lot as she acts like a grandmother to him. We watched him over the weekend and it was tough. My wife had a stern talk with me over all the things she thinks are wrong in his life. Namely his parents. His mother likes to go out to concerts (she's a bit of a free spirit) and both my son and DIL like to go out, which means we may have to watch him once every two weeks, sometimes overnight. They have a lot of cats and sometimes the house can be smelly and they have liquor bottles in plain site although I don't sense they have a problem. Most of the food they give him is processed, chicken nuggets, french toast sticks, etc. They have very demanding jobs, she is a nurse and my son works very long hours at his job, so much of the time only one parent is home and I don't think they eat together at the same table. I really don't sense the child is in danger and he is extremely bright, and most of the time has a good attitude, does well in school and loves to run around. My wife says that they don't put him first and that I and my ex-wife (loving grandma who also has issues with my son and DIL) should talk to them. I am hesitant as I am afraid to cause a rift and I would help my kids out any way I can. My wife has worked in education for many years and says she has seen these signs before and it can be dangerous. I think he rebellious behavior is not unusual for a 4 year old who knows how to test us and we need to be strong and consistent. His parents are aware of his outbursts as he can act out to them as well. They give him a time-out when it's warranted. The question (sorry this is so long) is do we confront my son and DIL about their lifestyle or just bite the bullet and enjoy the time we have with our grandson?
