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Grandparenting

Worried grandmother taking family cruise soon.

(61 Posts)
1969q Thu 30-May-24 17:10:10

Just found out I will be sharing a room with my 17 year old grandson on our family cruise to Europe. It’s a family of six. The other grandma will share with 13 year old grandaughter. My grandson has anxiety and social issues. Does not like to be touched or hugged, is a loner. Hides in his phone. I feel I should speak to him directly about our situation before this trip. Please advise soon.

Smileless2012 Fri 31-May-24 09:34:06

Generous of your son to be paying for this family cruise, but that doesn't mean he should have made the cabin arrangements without first discussing them with you, and from what you've posted, he hasn't even told you what those arrangements are.

If it's not possible for you get a single occupancy cabin due to availability or cost, think long and hard about whether or not you and your GS will be able to cope with this arrangement.

If you don't want to do this then tell your son asap and tell him why.

OurKid1 Fri 31-May-24 09:39:14

1969q

My son is paying this entire cruise for all 6 members. Found out from the other grandmother that he is my room mate and she has the grandaughter. Both of us grandmothers are in their lives, same neighborhood but it’s the grandson with major issues. Anxiety, social, not sure if he is still on meds will be asking his parents. I could just ignore or have a talk with him before trip. Relationship is iffy at times with grandson.

I don't see the issue as being his anxiety, social issues etc.. I can't understand why his parents thought it would be ok for a 17 year old boy to share a room with his grandma. Any 17 year olds I know would be mortified.

Katie590 Fri 31-May-24 10:20:56

“If you don't want to do this then tell your son asap and tell him why.”

Men can be clueless of the feelings of others and should have discussed sleeping arrangements beforehand. On most cruises there are empty inside cabins at low cost I would just book my own without saying. For me it would be treading on eggshells every day and I couldn’t enjoy the trip, sharing with the other GM would just about be tolerable because cabins are small

NotSpaghetti Fri 31-May-24 13:57:09

Katie590 I have once shared a room with "the other" grandmother for one night - but it was an emergency as our youngest grandchild was rushed into ICU in another country and there were sudden complicated childcare needs.

It was an emergency. This is supposed to be a pleasure.
I would definitely not want to do it on holiday!

maddyone Fri 31-May-24 14:02:21

Wouldn’t a better way be the two grandmothers share a cabin and the children share a cabin next door to the parents cabin?

maddyone Fri 31-May-24 14:06:05

I could have shared a room with the other grandma, prior to her son abusing our daughter. Now I wouldn’t even want to speak to her, let alone share a room with her. She thinks her son can do no wrong.
If these two grandmothers get on, I don’t see why they couldn’t share a room.

Jaxjacky Fri 31-May-24 15:05:29

OP not returned then.

Shelflife Fri 31-May-24 18:46:18

Not many 17 year olds would want to share a room with GM!!

Urmstongran Fri 31-May-24 18:53:50

wildswan16

13 year old should share with mum. 17 year old should share with dad. Grandmas should share together.

None of my 17 year olds would want to be sharing with an old woman. Most unfair to him.

Excellent solution. 👏

V3ra Fri 31-May-24 18:55:08

My sister-in-law shared a cabin with her 18 year old son on a cruise.
She said she hardly saw him as he slept all day and partied all night, it was like having the cabin to herself!