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Welcome to the *Gransnet Café. This is a non-judgemental space for you to pop in for a cuppa with some virtual friends, seek out advice for a particular problem, or share an update on your life - important or trivial. Feel free to have your say and chat about your day, but please leave any arguments at the door. If you're struggling to find someone to talk to in real life, or are simply looking for a bit of a chat, this is the place for you.

Soop's kitchen for friendly folk and precious pets...

(1001 Posts)
soop Sun 21-May-17 16:25:05

Here we are again
Happy as can be
All good pals and jolly good company.
Never mind the weather
Never mind the rain
As long as we're together...Woops she goes again.

Welcome.

PoshGran Thu 08-Jun-17 18:49:19

Grey grin (Me too writing it!!)
Tegan split pins?

Tegan2 Thu 08-Jun-17 18:55:49

I've just googled it and 'brass fasteners' has come up. However, I don't think I've EVER known what they were called. Used to use them to make paper puppets for the children.

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Jun-17 18:56:02

N&G I would have voted for him!!

Greyduster Thu 08-Jun-17 19:07:30

Bulldog clips?

PoshGran Thu 08-Jun-17 19:08:11

Yup, that's the guys Tegan. I've got a tub of brass split pins for making Father C........, & nursery rhyme characters.
PS There's just something about real stationery shops isn't there? smile

Greyduster Thu 08-Jun-17 19:09:38

Oh those! Not bulldog clips......

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Jun-17 19:30:35

DH has drawers full of stationery which I'm sure we'll never use.

Elastic bands (the wrong size), nice pins for cork boards (no cork boards in this house now), lots of biro refills and biros which don't work but don't match each other, some suspect-looking blue-tac, enough paper clips to 'put a girdle round the earth in forty minutes - oh and at least one new box of treasury tags!

Jalima1108 Thu 08-Jun-17 19:33:40

Highlighting pens, permanent markers (just how many does one man need?), weird looking metal clips, plastic tags for files, rubber thimbles x 2, I could go on but I expect you're bored now!

And a bag of gold stars for good behaviour smile

PoshGran Thu 08-Jun-17 20:52:30

Are these things all in his "Man Drawer" Jalima, or in addition to it?
If the gold stars haven't been used does that mean he's been a bad boy?
wink

callgirl1 Thu 08-Jun-17 22:27:03

I`ve never heard of treasury tags.

Swanny Thu 08-Jun-17 22:33:26

Little green bits of string with a thin metal or plastic bar at each end. Used for holding papers together through punched holes. Sort of like this I-----I

Any help?

grannyqueenie Thu 08-Jun-17 23:01:54

One of the lovely things about this kitchen is the way the conversation morphs from rubbish internet connection in Argyle, through the perils and lip biting of holidaying with small grandchildren and other assorted topics right through to stationery bits and bobs!!
Hard to explain exactly how that happened but perfectly logical to any sensible woman and just how it goes in real life too! Whatever we wake up to tomorrow morning our resilience, humour and common sense will carry us through.
I'm off to watch the election speculations with a glass or 3 in hand and text conversations with my two most politically aware children to keep me awake. But I have to it saddens me hugely to see armed police on an election platform.

Charleygirl Fri 09-Jun-17 09:36:03

Thanks Swanny I know what they are, I just never knew what they were called.

I watched TV until fairly late and resisted switching it on when I went to the loo around 4am but I watched TV from 6-9am and I have had more than enough of politics now, it would have been good to see another channel showing other news.

annsixty Fri 09-Jun-17 17:10:19

I have had to come to the kitchen because it is only on here I can vent.
My H is driving me mad, it is as simple as that.
I want to run away.

Lona Fri 09-Jun-17 17:26:43

Oh ann I can only imagine how frustrating your life must be. Can your dh be left on his own for a short time, say, an hour? Could you go out for a walk just to calm down a bit, or is it out of the question?
I do feel for you (((hugs)))

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Jun-17 17:33:30

Are these things all in his "Man Drawer" Jalima, or in addition to it? If the gold stars haven't been used does that mean he's been a bad boy?
This is in addition to the 'man-drawer' Poshgran
He subscribes to Murphy's Law.

I think the gold stars could be a leftover from when DGS was staying and being potty trained. He's 9 now. I will put them in the DGC's craft basket ready to be thrown out if we downsize.

Treasury tags - as used extensively in the Civil Service, threaded through holes in endless sheets of paper and cardboard files to keep them together and so that the file can be opened up flat (unless it gets too bulky).

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Jun-17 17:33:39

Ann it must be so frustrating - are you getting any respite help at all yet?

Bellanonna Fri 09-Jun-17 17:40:18

Ann is it not possible to get a H-sitter for a couple of hours? You really need to get away. A retired dementia nurse, or anyone really who would be sympathetic and understand what they were dealing with. You could meet a friend for a chat, or whatever you find calming. I really think it's time for you to get help. Really!!

PoshGran Fri 09-Jun-17 17:41:12

(( ann.))
brew or wine ?

annsixty Fri 09-Jun-17 17:55:58

Thank you all. H will not have anybody in but I do get out a couple of times a week for about 2 hours. The thing is I have to come back to it. I long for an intelligent conversation ( I do get that from a fellow GNer) but none at home. I am frustrated beyond belief s
and my big b'day coming up is depressing me as it won't be celebrated, but no change there!!! Another bone of contention.

MawBroon Fri 09-Jun-17 18:29:58

Right
Take two
Long post, previewed and disappeared so I will try again. First of all, flowers annsixty
Paw has gone off to bed having dozed in his chair for the past 2 hours since coming back from his blood transfusion. He is feeling the cold these days and I had to nearly forcibly restrain him from putting the heating and the gas fire on!
I look out onto our garden table and pergola with its grape vine and feel we should be enjoying a summer supper with just a possibility of a glass of wine
But no party round the Broons tonight sad
He is often in bed by 7/7.30 these days so the evenings can get lonely.
DD keeps telling me I should get more help, more respite but that isn't exactly the problem. It is support or help with the ongoing responsibility, the emotional effects of an absence of the company of friends in a social sense, the feeling that somebody might say "Shall we go to such and such today?" or suggest a takeaway. Somebody to take the emotional ongoing strain of the worries in the wee small hours or to help pin a grin on my face in the morning. I wonder if that is anything like how you feel annsixty
Oh dear, better stop whingeing right now. Things could be worse (and probably will be!!) !
I sometimes think it might be different if the DDs lived nearer but they have their own busy weekends, juggling jobs, husbands, children, homes (TBH just as I claimed I had at their age! ) so, no, I just have to get on with it. I do wish you lot lived nearer though, I think it could get quite raucous fun!
Grace's rose is just coming into flower in the garden. Am I getting senile to go out every morning and talk to her/it(in my head)? I feel closer to her when I am out ther.
Sad dog-lady.
Right, onwards and well, onwards eh?

annsixty Fri 09-Jun-17 19:02:20

We have to go onwards don't we Maw we have no choice.

NanaandGrampy Fri 09-Jun-17 19:15:48

Evening all!

Arrived home .....time to breathe smile .

I will catch up tomorrow I promise.

So sorry to see how you're feeling Ann . That's the whole crux of it isn't it? You always have to come back to it . There is no solution and I understand how that must make you feel.

Maw I feel for you too! How much fun could we have if we all lived a little closer? Your table in the garden looks like a wonderful place to while away an evening ! Talk away to Grace - no one thinks you're mad !!

We're glad to be home . Sam was good but we've been having some problems which might be down to anxiety , so I'm investing in a visit from a behaviourist . I've never experienced this before so hopefully we can get some help for him .

But tonight, it's beans on toast and an early night ( I think I need another holiday to get over this one ! ) x

Charleygirl Fri 09-Jun-17 19:17:27

MawB I think that Paw should move in with my neighbours. The builder and I were laughing today because their central heating was on and we were outside having a break enjoying the sunshine.

ann I do not know what to suggest- I do feel for you. I know that H is being selfish but obviously does not realise it. He has totally forgotten that you have a life also and I am sure that if he did not have dementia he would be mortified. I do think, like others that you need help even if it causes ructions at home- I do not see any other way around it, your mental health is important.

Greyduster Fri 09-Jun-17 19:28:28

I feel so sad, Ann and Maw, to read your posts, that I wish there was something that I could physically do to alleviate your sadness. I don't have a lot of company other than DH these days (which is why I value GN so much), but at least he is there in every sense. My heart goes out to you both. ??
My grandson is with us overnight as his parents are out of town. He has eaten a plate of sausages, mash and three veg and has spotted the jelly in the fridge hmm. I am under strict instructions to restrict his evening snack to a small piece of fruit in case he decides to decorate my bathroom again!! ("Why is there always carrot in it" don't they say? Because you always give him carrots you idiot! ?). When we picked him up from school I was talking to one of DD's friends who, although she has two grown up daughters, is the mother of a ten year old, and the grandmother of a nearly three year old who she had with her. He's a dear little chap and I was commenting how he was starting to leave his baby looks behind. She said "You know, I would never have believed what a huge rush of love I feel every time I see him. I didn't think being a granny could be so wonderful." I said to her that I wish I had a pound for every time I had heard that - I could retire! And it is so true.

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