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DD will be discharged from hospital this afternoon.

(522 Posts)
merlotgran Fri 26-Apr-19 13:34:01

It will be for the last time as there is no further treatment possible other than pain relief. She wants to be at home with all of us so we will do everything we can to make whatever time she has left comfortable and stress free. We will have support from Macmillan and district nurses and should there come a time when we are no longer able to cope, DD has agreed to go into a hospice.

Family support has been wonderful but I have to admit I'm a little scared and very, very sad.

grannybuy Sat 27-Apr-19 09:39:46

You are going through one of the worst times of your life and I am thinking of you. Your love for her will give you strength.

Mollygo Sat 27-Apr-19 09:40:14

Sending warmest thoughts at this difficult time. How lovely for her that thanks to you she can come home for her remaining time. ?

Magrithea Sat 27-Apr-19 09:40:34

Sending love and hugs - I know we're all anonymous on here but I can't imagine the pain you must be in. Macmillan will be brilliant and give you lots of support flowers

NannyInTheKitchen Sat 27-Apr-19 09:47:09

Thinking of you flowers

dizzygran Sat 27-Apr-19 09:47:39

How heart breaking for you and your family. Your DD has been so brave and now you have to take your lead from her. There may be things she wants to do or see - or a special place she would like to visit if she is able. The coming days are so special for you all. love and wishes

Rosepaul Sat 27-Apr-19 09:52:14

My love and thoughts are with you all

Ellylanes1 Sat 27-Apr-19 09:53:17

Thoughts are with you and your family. Bless you all.

vickya Sat 27-Apr-19 09:59:32

All the best, Merlot, for you and the family. xxx

Mrsh60 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:00:11

God bless Merlot my heart is broke for you x

25Avalon Sat 27-Apr-19 10:11:56

It is a hard thing you have to do but be assured you will get lots of help and support from the wonderful nurses and in a way peace as you are doing the right thing for your daughter. Make the best of what little time you have left together - it is precious. Love and heart felt prayers.

MooM00 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:12:31

Merlot, I feel your pain. My Niece died last November at the age of 30 she had 3 very young children 2, 4, and 6 It was her wish to be at home with her family. She was never left day or night on her own. I live 350 miles away I am pleased to say I managed to be with her a couple of times when she was in her wheelchair and went out. Also I was lucky enough to be there with the rest of the family when she died. So Sad.

Laurensnan Sat 27-Apr-19 10:13:16

Merlot , I witnessed my son go through the same, he was terminally ill with cancer age 26. This was in 2010. It is the most scariest horrendous thing I've ever witnessed or every will witness. The dear and heartbreak is like no other when it is your child. Please message me if you need any friendly support. Thinking of you so much. Jo xx

EllenT Sat 27-Apr-19 10:13:51

Thinking of you and your family flowers

NemosMum Sat 27-Apr-19 10:15:22

Sending you the warmest thoughts Merlot. My first husband wanted to come home from hospice - against medical advice - to spend his last days. I was terrified, but I had help from the district team, co-ordinated by the MacMillan Nurse, and we were able to fulfil his wishes. That was 25 years ago. Nowadays there are multidisciplinary teams for palliative and end-of-life care in most areas. Do not be afraid to ask for any help you need. I hope that you can spend time with your daughter telling her that you love her and remembering good times together. I have lost 2 husbands, but not a child, and I can only imagine how you must feel flowers

mtp123 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:16:12

So very sorry to read your very sad post. A truly dreadful time for you all, you are all in my thoughts.

Laurensnan Sat 27-Apr-19 10:17:33

Merlot I've re written this reply again as there were to many autocorrect errors in my post and I can't delete it.

Laurensnan

Merlot , I witnessed my son go through the same horrendous thing. He was terminally ill with cancer age 26. This was in 2010. It is the most scariest horrendous thing I've ever witnessed or every will witness. The fear and heartbreak is like no other when it is your child. Please message me if you need any friendly support. Thinking of you so much. Jo xx

Teddy111 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:21:42

I am sure your love for her will give you the strength you will need. Thinking of you and all your family.

Hm999 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:22:12

Sending love

breeze Sat 27-Apr-19 10:22:43

Dear merlot flowers

luluaugust Sat 27-Apr-19 10:22:52

So very sorry my thoughts are with you flowers

Barmeyoldbat Sat 27-Apr-19 10:31:34

Oh Merlot how awful, I am just so sorry, at least she is able to come home. My best wishes, will think of you tomorrow in quiet time at Friends Meeting. flowers

Niucla97 Sat 27-Apr-19 10:34:36

My heart goes out to you. What you are doing is so hard but you will have no regrets. My husband wouldn't go into a hospice when he was given a couple of weeks to live.

We went to stay with my son and his family who were there to support us. We had wonderful support from my son's GP and the District nurses (once we got over all the red tape and 'hurdles'*) He lasted almost four months, towards the end we had the amazing Marie Curie nurses and the ladies from the hospice who came in to wash him and make him comfortable. We were able to be with him right to the end without having to travel, park and sit in hospitals. Just sad that we didn't talk more (but my husband was never a 'talker!')

Yes, we were scared but it was what he wanted. Just make the most of the time you have together.

Big hugs , heartfelt thoughts and wishes, be strong. flowers

*We live in a rural area and the hoops we had to jump through when it was the last thing we needed. My son lives just over a mile away from us our GP would have carried on caring but the DNs wouldn't co-operate. So we had to change to our son's GP who I only have admiration for.

He needed a hospital bed as requested by our GP and the Hospice DR but the DN had to access him in situ - the red tape!!! It was really was ridiculous

missdeke Sat 27-Apr-19 10:38:09

flowers

Houndi Sat 27-Apr-19 10:42:08

You are doing the only thing you can do giving her love and your daughter been with her family .If she does have to go into a hospice because it becomes to much rest assured that they are very special places.I am speaking from experience nothing is so much trouble and they treat your loved one as they are the only person that exists.They are also excellent with the familyxx

Castafiore Sat 27-Apr-19 10:45:04

Wishing you lots of strength and courage.