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Black dog gang 2..

(1000 Posts)
SparklyGrandma Sat 25-May-19 20:20:03

Hello everyone...

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 20:23:58

Hello Sparkle

Thank you for starting a new thread , how are you ?

SparklyGrandma Sat 25-May-19 20:26:20

Hi Annie lovely to see you were able to pick your own plans. And have chairs out the front?

Tired but maybe having cousins visiting tomorrow, I understand the talking thing. How are you?

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 20:30:40

I have good and not so good days Sparkle , it was a joy to choose the colour of the plants I wanted.

It’s bank holiday again, are you coping ?

SparklyGrandma Sat 25-May-19 20:33:00

Well so far so tired. I had forgot it was another BH, social services coming around on Tuesday, no chance to get out before Weds therefore, grrrr!

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 20:39:42

I am sorry Sparkle. What do you do to pass the weekend?

SparklyGrandma Sat 25-May-19 20:46:24

*Read, play online Scrabble, watch Netflix. Voyager at the moment.

Annie what passes it for you?

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 21:01:24

I spend most of my day on my iPad Sparkle, I love cross stitching but have to allow the arthritis in my hands calm down, I can’t watch tv unless I can stitch.

I play Scrabble, Killer Sudoku, my Family Tree, email friends, have a phone chat with younger daughter, talk and play with my dogs.

SparklyGrandma Sat 25-May-19 21:12:25

My iPad is typing this, aren’t they wonderful? I have friends I chat online with, school friends, old work friends, etc.

The Scrabble I play is Words with Friends...I have headphones on mine so I don’t disturb my neighbours...listen to R4 when nothing else....

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 21:38:40

I play Words With Friends with my younger daughter and get rather annoyed at some of the words allowed . I listen to
Radio 4 in bed, tonight it’s Brain of Britain , never know the answers but i like the relaxed way the questions are asked and answered .

nanny2507 Sat 25-May-19 22:21:37

hello. I was just about to re start the thread but thought i,d check first and here you are! xx

Anniebach Sat 25-May-19 22:24:08

Hello nanny have you seen mouse today ?

nanny2507 Sat 25-May-19 22:41:33

sadly not...i,ve stopped shaking the biscuit bag so sooty or fatty as i will call him doesn't know i,m putting the food out grin

nanny2507 Sat 25-May-19 22:44:44

today i got a little bit upset because as i was kissing my older cat i smelt his fur and it smelt of the outside and i remembered how i would tell babycakes (my stolen kitten) not his real name but thats what i called him, how he smelt of outside sad as i kissed him a thousand times

nanny2507 Sat 25-May-19 22:47:59

babycakes sad

Anniebach Sun 26-May-19 08:56:18

Good morning friends

nanny what a beautiful cat.

How is everyone coping with the long weekend?

Dawn22 Sun 26-May-19 09:50:27

Yes Annie
Thanks for rasing this subject of quiet times over bank holiday weekends.
With anxiety there is always a thinking that other people are managing better and having a great time and it all falls flat for those of us with anxiety. It is the comparison thing .
Any thoughts on the matter from yourself or anyone else would be appreciated. Very best from Dawn.

Dawn22 Sun 26-May-19 09:57:05

Hi everyone
While l am thinking of this topic. Does anyone have any advice on calming down thoughts on a weekend like this when you can have more time to think, quietening down the monkey mind
Hope the day goes well enough for everyone. Dawn.

Marilla Sun 26-May-19 10:09:27

You have hit the nail on the head when you say others are having a great time and it falls flat for us! I do envy those who have lovely plans AND carry them through.
Up until two years ago, we would think nothing of going off to the beach ( a one hour drive), have a great day and come home happy and relaxed. Now I worry about what would I wear, do we have enough coins to feed the parking machine,
eating times, nearest loos etc.......absolutely ridiculous!
I know this seaside town like the back of my hand.
This is the time of my life when I should be enjoying trips and activities. It’s so frustrating and scarey.

Anniebach Sun 26-May-19 12:05:43

Bank Holidays, routines are scrapped , libraries etc closed, if weather is good we keep hearing of traffic heading for the beach , with anxiety change in routine is disturbing.

I love GN but we read of plans for spending time with families , this is how it should be , but for me memories of times with my family come to mind.

For me ,perhaps because of past circumstances , I have experienced so many different ways of spending bank holidays,

Marilla the cursed ‘what if’s’ are plaguing you ,

Dawn most of the time I am able to tell myself , stop that thought’, if thoughts of happier times creep in , I dismiss them with ‘that was another country’,

Today I think, ‘just one more day and back to normal (what ever normal is) .

Calming anxiety is the hardest and I do think it is change in routine which raises our anxiety.

Nonnie Sun 26-May-19 12:36:27

nanny 8 weeks is no time to learn to cope with grief. Be kind to yourself.

Annie it sounds quite positive for you at the moment.

Marilla would lists help? Maybe it would help you work out what you don't need to worry about? Does it really matter when you eat or what you wear? I no longer think anyone will be looking at me so just wear what I fancy wearing. On a good day could you sort out some change and leave it in the car for when needed?

I am so sad for those of you who have difficulty on weekends and bank holidays because I don't, they are just another day to me as I have no routines anyway.

My positives for today are: its raining so will help the grass seed grow. I sorted my handbags into colours. Did the ironing. Thinking about DH & DS having a day out together tomorrow which doesn't happen very often. They will be doing something which will remind them of our dead son but will be able to support each other. Now will plan what I will do tomorrow when I have the day to myself.

Will post more positives as often as I can.

Marilla Sun 26-May-19 12:36:45

Anniebach, thankyou for your wise words; it’s so reassuring to be able to express these feelings without feeling silly.
I have grandchildren who now live quite close and while I love them to bits and appreciate how lucky we are to have them so near. Half term will leave me mentally exhausted trying to deal with the expectations and lack of routine.

Anniebach Sun 26-May-19 12:59:12

Marilla there is nothing silly in expressing feelings, I speak of mine which perhaps some may call silly but they are not because they are real to me as yours are to you.

Holding back thoughts and feelings of anxiety, depression etc is not good, this is why these monsters have remained so badly understood .

Anniebach Sun 26-May-19 15:21:37

nonnie I wasn’t referring to my routine, but the routine of week days, the bank holiday although being a Monday isn’t a Monday is it?

Anniebach Sun 26-May-19 15:26:51

Just listened to the news, there has been a NHS trial, people with anxiety were treated with a gadget which gave them mild electric shocks . Available now at a cost of £500 - £600,
NICE are now studying the results of the trial , if they pass it perhaps it will be available on NHS .

Thoughts ?

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