Black Dog Gang 6

Thanks for the kind messages. I'm coping well with the lockdown, because it is within my control. Its the other thing which is so unreasonable, lacks logic and I have no control over. On top of the its the 'what next to hit me'.

Why I agree with those who say you should talk to your doctor. Seems to me you are not in a good position to make big decisions about the rest of your life and need help.

Annie that helpless feeling when you know someone needs help but there is nothing you can do about it. Sorry all those calls wore you out but glad that there are people nearby to care about you. Yes, the flashbacks or whatever you call them.

Positives: yesterday I made some Marguerite Patten recipes from the 1940s and took some down to the 98 year old who lives alone down the road. She is wonderful and bearing up really well. Sat out front with neighbours and wine discussing a big street party when all this is over. Going to hack down a hedge today before the sun disappears.

Keep safe all

Hi all x

How is everyone ?

So sorry I couldn’t join you yesterday, Thursday and yesterday
there were police patrols every couple of hours walking into the Cul de Sac, walking as far as next door then leaving.

To distract myself I decided to wash this month’s delivery of
liquid food bottles, did too many in one go, very, very painful
for hands ! So avoided the iPad.

nonnie yes nothing I can do about it but this doesn’t stop
the thought - ‘is she dead or dying alone. And guilt for wishing she could be taken from her home , I could then sit
in my back or front garden .

annie yet more worry for you. Your poor hands. I would be wondering what’s going on too. I can’t understand why the police are just walking away without checking on her. It seems very strange. Hope you have a better day today.
nonnie nice of you to visit your neighbour. Hope you didn’t get too close. I bet she was pleased with your visit.
Have a good day all x

hello everyone. Hope you are all well. I have been all consumed by this lock down things are hard. but hey ho. I haven't read all the back messages so i am sorry if ive missed anything. My best friend died from his brain tumour on april 21st exactly 2 weeks after diagnosis. Funeral is Monday xxx

nanny yes hard times, so sorry to learn of the death of your
best friend, you won’t be able to attend the funeral service ?

it is a relief to hear from you, sending hugs x

Nanny so sorry to hear your sad news... God bless x

Annie don’t feel guilty, you were wanting her to be looked after and be safe you did not wish her any harm... it all upset you so much x

So sorry to hear your news Nanny.

Glad to see you Annie, sad to hear about your neighbour, these mental health issues take so long to get the result that is required, such a shame.

Take care everyone, stay safe and have a peaceful evening one and all xx

Thank you. Sadly it’s addiction, she has been admitted several
times but is free to sign herself out, she can’t be helped under
the mental health act.

Hi nanny sorry for the loss of your friend. We attended our first online funeral last week and it was actually very touching and moving,
annie I hope you have a more restful night tonight. I watched another service at Canterbury Cathedral this morning from the herb garden. The Dean was talking bout all the herbs and their medicinal purposes. His cat was quietly dipping its paw in the milk jug and licking it clean. Obviously something it’s quite used to doing ?

Hi all x

How is lockdown affecting our anxiety and depression ?

Good morning all x

Hi Annie I have had a couple of worrying days regarding the lockdown, I read something that was on line in the local paper that was supposedly from the local hospital and the contents really frightened me. I didn't sleep well at all, it was on my mind. Now I wonder if it was actually validated by the editor of the paper. However, yesterday I read an essay in one of the papers by an epidemiologist that made me feel much better and gave a different perspective (I shall cut it out and keep reading it now )

I have dreadful anxiety at the best of times which results in IBS so this situation doesn't help at all.
It will come to an end I know but I don't think life will ever be the same.

Hope you are doing alright Annie, you have more bottles to wash! xx

Love to all, take care xx

Dear Annie, Doodle and everyone, another week. Have been thinking of all of you and send love and moral support, as ever Xxxx

carillion that’s kind. Thank you.
I’m not sure the lockdown itself is affecting me that much. As usual my worries centre more on my family and how it is affecting them. We are lucky in that although we don’t have a garden we do have a nice view from our balcony so we can get some fresh air. I feel for those with young children kept inside and those afraid for their jobs.
How’s everyone else today? Did you sleep last night annie?

Annie yes, I get it, I am one of the few who knows.

Doodle she really is amazing, she stood in her porch and I was down her path. She was not at all bothered by all the lock down, just her normal self. Perhaps its because she has been living alone for many years and is used to it. I'll visit her more often when her neighbours move because she will really miss them.

nanny so sorry to hear about your friend, so hard especially as you may not be allowed to go to the funeral. Hope it is live streamed if you can't.

Not really too bothered about the lock down. I think it is because I have a bigger worry but also because I know we are in a better position to cope than many. We have a weekly supermarket delivery and people to help if we need anything else. Local shops are apparently stepping up but we don't need to go to them. Been in lock down for 8 weeks now and the only time I went 'out' was Friday when I dropped some baking off with the old lady at the end of our cul de sac.

I have been in lockdown for over 3 years, I have tried to overcome the problem several times but something cropped up and stopped my plans. Now I think I will accept the agoraphobia, this isn’t depression.

Trying to overcome the agoraphobia I knew my fears were
irrational, now some fears are not irrational. I miss my granddaughter so much but am so worried about her, she had
to start her first year at university again because of her mothers death, this summer she would have been taking her
finals, but still has her third year ahead. This is my concern.

I am sleeping ok now thank you x

Washed 20 bottles this morning, not going to do 50 again as I did last week .

I do miss having to stop working on my indoor garden, long
for more house plants but all the washing of everything means
I can’t buy more.

You have had your plans dashed Annie hoping you would get out and overcome things. I think it will still happen for you just not at the moment xx And I understand your love of plants too. Hopefully things will improve there too.

I understand how much you miss your darling grand daughter. My daughter was coming to see me but all plans for her to be brought to see me are now on hold til goodness know when. Will I ever see her again, one thing this situation has made me realise is that I am old and I never really thought I was. I have heard from her today and one of the patients where she is has been to A&E this afternoon, with virus like symptons, so we now wait on the test results!

I keep saying my prayers that this situation will improve, if only a little at a time and we can see some return to normality if only slightly.

Please take care, stay safe everyone, and have a peaceful evening. Love to all xx

nonnie it will come right, don’t allow yourself to think what is bad will triumph x

lavender oh I ache for you, to be separated from your daughter, her visit home to you on hold and now the fear of
the results for the patient. I understand about realising ageing ,
we are living in a time of ‘the unknown. X

Oh how we care for our loved ones. Do you think there are people out there who have no worries because they only care for themselves?
annie I hope your granddaughter is ok. It’s a worrying time for those with exams. Shame about your indoor garden. Have you got any plants already or were you just making preparations?
lavender I’m sorry your daughter will not be able to visit at the moment. She must be disappointed too. Hope she is nowhere near the patient with the suspected virus. I too hope and pray things get better for us all.
nonnie nice of you to think of visiting your neighbour when this is allowed. Social contact is important to us all. I wish you were able to get out annie.
I am getting used to being in. My friend fears she is becoming scared to go out. It’s a worrying time for many.
Take care all and sleep well. x

Hi my lovely friends. I apologise for not popping in before now but have had few family issues that are difficult asl I can’t see a solution. If only I could put a sticky plaster and all will be healed.
Enough about me Annie , why, Joce, lavender, Doodle, Nonnie, nanny and apologies if I have not mentioned you by name. We all seem to be going through lots of ups and downs as well as dealing with the virus. It really is an awful time however I guess we can only do our best whatever that is.
Annie I must mention that was a terrible time you had to go through recently. You must have been mentally and emotionally tired. I do hope you are a bit better.
Hope you are all a bit better. Tonight I feel unsettled between virus worries and family concerns so might try and watch something on iPad to distract my mind.
Sorry if I have not mentioned anything more personal to those in need but I will say a little prayer for you all tonight.
Take care, stay safe and let’s try to be strong together. Xx
,

flutterby so sorry you have extra worries, but so pleased to
see you x

Yes I was distressed last week, but have calmed down , I know
there was and is nothing I can do to help the woman. She can
be very aggressive.

I watched a musical yesterday and today, sheer fantasy but I
enjoy them.

Doodle I have some plants in my indoor garden, had planned to buy more, Will have to wait,

Not sure if I said last week, if so sorry , I have a lot of shrubs in
large pots in my garden, think about 15, I have one I planted 15
years ago, have moved house twice since. Every spring I look
at ‘old faithful’ to see if it has survived another winter, this
Spring all the others in leaf, not that one, then last week spotted tiny leaves, it has survived ?

Annie just popped back in to say I also love musicals. They take you to a different place. Xx

Yes flutterby I was in Camelot yesterday ? x

annie so please your plant is sprouting again. Life goes on. I love it when the first buds appear. Is it because of your hands you can’t get plants at the moment or because they are shut due to lockdown? Hope you have a peaceful night tonight.
flutterby nice to hear from you again. Hope your family issues are resolved soon. As you say, lots of ups and downs for us all. Try not to think about things at bedtime and relax your mind. Take care.x