BLACK DOG 9

nonnie

‘I will think about it tomorrow’

After all, tomorrow is another day’

‘Always be yourself

Unless you can be Scarlett O’Hara

Then always be Scarlett O’Hara ‘

?

Ellie Anne it is useful to know that you think yourself unhappy rather than depressed.
I wonder if you are still living with you husband and that is causing you to be unhappy. If you know why you are unhappy, is there anything you can do to change the situation?
Doesn’t sound as though your GP was particularly helpful. Could you contact MIND or self refer yourself for some help.
Good that you go out for walks and have friends. Hopefully with lockdown easing you will be able to socialise and get out more.
Annie I love that quote. Really made me smile.
I think many of us keep looking back. Things we had or did we don’t do now. Past anxieties or worries and things that have happened in the past. I was listening to a church service yesterday and the Dean said look to the future let the worries of the past go.
Nonnie I must remember to book my hair appointment too, before I can’t see where I’m going any more,
I too struggle to exercise. I know I should. Sounds as though you keep yourself fit which is good and exercise is supposed to help depression. So you keep going with yours and I’ll get the hoopla hoop out, ?
Wow. I was in a chocolate binge Sunday and Monday. Cutting back now but oh so tempting, ?
Take care all x

Doodle he was right, we cannot change the past so let it go x

Doodle my exercise programme is 'age-appropriate' but I do try. Incentive is that one day I will finally see my GCs and want to run and play with them even if I can't keep up with them. I also do it to keep DH on his toes because I think he might well give up and become a couch potato if I don't. No don't nag him but I have my subtle ways!

Sunny day here, I'm going out.

Afternoon all x Didn’t sleep well last night worrying about second AZ jab looming. I was really pleased to have the first jab but now I’ve frightened myself reading about the ‘rare’ blood clots. Considering just leaving it at the first one, especially as I’m not planning to mix anytime soon. Hope I’m not putting anybody else off by saying this x

Hi all x

Just spent two hours talking to HMRC, shattered , well some of the two hours was repeats of - we have a high volume of calls etc, grrrrr

BlueSky understandably you feel as you do, it was said in a discussion this morning, the blood clots have not happened with a second dose . X

Late good afternoon
Doodle- The Dean was right we must look forward not back- we cannot change the past however much we would like to.
Have you booked your hair appointment yet? I,m beginning to wish I hadn’t hacked at mine quite so much it’s going to be a bit of a challenge for for my lovely hairdresser!!!!
Choc binge must have been lovely- I love it but hardly touch it as I have to avoid caffeine?
Nonnie- really admire your exercise ethic- I walk 3 miles a day but no “exercises” except normal activities. I do agree it’s important to be able to keep up with GC . I used to whizz about like a loony with mine but can’t keep up with the GGC. Subtle ways sounds very intriguing ?
Annie - hope you are ok today despite annoying phone calls. It’s the dreadful music they play while you,re waiting that does my head in.
Felt really tired and anxious this morning but made myself go out and about with DH and feel better this afternoon.
I hope you all in BDG are having a good day

Bluesky I read in the paper today that all the reports of blood clots relate to the first injection and NONE from having the second. DH and I had the AZ one too and will be having our second on 22nd. I also read that a large number of those admitted to hospital with COVID went on to have a stroke. So in my opinion, for myself, I would rather have the jab than not. The effects of having COVID could be much worse. You stand more chance of being struck by lightening than by having blood clots from the vaccination. Try not to worry.
I don’t want to influence you in any way but many places and travel companies have said they won’t accept people without them having had two vaccinations. Before you decide. You need to research what effect only having one jab will have on your ability to go to restaurants pubs, holidays etc but also how it will affect you if you later decide to have vaccination.
Nonnie we went for a walk today but I did have quite a backache. It think it’s related to my stretching exercises. I obviously need to do more and get used to it.
Annie some of these phone lines are horrendous. Hope you managed to get the problem sorted.

Scaredycat I will phone the hairdresser on Monday. I think they will be open then. I won’t book the appointment until after our second jab on the 22nd as I want to be as safe as possible
I phoned GP today and arranged for her to chat with DH re his sleep problems. He has had difficulty sleeping for a while but it has been getting worse and worse. He has irritation like restless leg syndrome but in his whole body. He cannot rest in bed or sit in a chair he just has to keep walking. Last night he hardly slept at all, I have wondered if it is withdrawal symptoms from the tramadol he was taking when he fell and broke his ribs but whatever the reason it’s getting worse. Fortunately, the GP was sympathetic and has prescribed something which hopefully will help. Fingers crossed because he complains so little and has so many health problems but this one has been getting him down. Hope you all have a good night. X

Morning all x Doodle and Annie thanks for your concern. I’ve calmed down now but that’s how I react, it must be my health anxiety, always in the background ready to pounce. As I said before, I try to avoid most occasions where there could be a remote element of danger, luckily my DH is the opposite, so he encourages me while I restrain him! Same if my DC or DGC tell me they are doing something or going somewhere, I catastrophise straight away! All part of my anxiety no doubt.
Have a pleasant day x

BlueSky no, please go for the second. If you didn't react to the first the science says you won't react to the second. Better to be safe than to risk it.

Annie sympathy about HMRC, been there done that, been patronised etc.

Doodle so sorry to hear how hard it is for DH, maybe he should complain more but it does sound like you have a good GP. Hope whatever he has been given works.

I seem to be ahead of most of you, having had both vaccinations so this is how I now view it. I thought I might be reticent about restarting things but am finding my brief foray into the world easy. I opened a branch only saving account and today am going for a hearing test. Other appointments booked too. I may feel different after going into town for the first time today but, at the moment, feeling pretty good about doing it. Not yet ready for public transport or a supermarket but sure that will come.

Coped well with several phone calls trying to sort out how to pay into the new saving account. Bank verification turns out to be impossible. I was given 3 different combinations of the building society name to use, told to use my own name and even tried the bank they bank with, none of it worked. If the staff don't know is it any wonder the wait time on the phone is long? My point is that at no time did I get cross or show my irritation so I count that as a win. I solved it by paying in £1 and checking it had arrived!!

Will try and post more positives tomorrow.

Bluesky- Glad you feel calmer today. I understand that you felt nervous after the publicity regarding the 2nd jab . Please have it as it will give you more protection and ultimately some confidence too. Getting Covid would be far more dangerous.
I know so well how Health Anxiety messes with your head. I could have written your post this morning. I hope you are having a good day.
Doodle- good idea to have your 2nd jab before the hair appt but at least you,ll be all booked in and ready.I do hope your husbands new prescription will help him to relax. It must be so tiring for him and for you too.
Today on our walk the little lambs were out in the sunshine - and a few bluebells out already too. Spring has sprung!!
Nonnie- Wow! Into town today I look forward to hearing about your trip. Yes now we have our 2nd jab it is time to dip our toes in again. I,m not as brave as you but go to M&S food hall near us but not a supermarket yet. Also been to a walking distance garden centre a few times. Can’t wait though to see the sea again once weather has warmed up a bit.
Annie- hope you are ok today x
Take care allxx

Hi all x

BlueSky I had the same thoughts as you when the news first
broke, I thought- well I have been in lockdown for 4 years and little will change so why have the second, then I thought of my
grandchildren not coming to see me, then came the news that
the poor people who were affected was after the first jab.

I have at last heard from the physiotherapy dept, reports from the enablers and the physiotherapy staff, nothing can be done to my twisted leg, the occupational therapist has ordered a standard self propelled wheelchair, if I like it and if my hands will be able tograsp it they will order a small one which will be mine to keep.

I have been referred back to the enablement team for support
to use the wheelchair and scooter. Not thrilled about that but ?
yes acceptance, there is no choice .

Doodle thank you for your concern.My situation is complicated and I can’t see any way out just now, as I said all my coping strategies went with covid. If things ever go back to how they were things will improve. I’ve just ordered some pills from healthspan which are supposed to help your mood.

Ellie Anne whatever pills you have ordered please don’t take them with any medication.

Things will get easier but we have to learn to live parts of our lives differently, we can do it x

Well DH had his first night’s sleep for a month or more.
The tablets seemed to help and he slept well. I on the other hand stayed awake most of the night just to make sure he was ok and not suffering any strange side effects from the tablets ?
Bluesky I hope you are feeling less anxious today.
Nonnie pleased you have had both jabs. Can’t wait for my second.
You sound more positive and assured which is good. Hope it continues.
Scaredycat I love watching the lambs. I’m always amazes at how high they jump when they run around. It’s a good idea to take a slow approach to getting back to shopping and things. It’s been such a strange year for us all.
Annie will the small wheelchair enable you to go and sleep in your own bed? I do hope so. I’m sorry there isn’t anything they can do for your leg.
Are you still having your daily help coming in?
Ellie Anne there have been numerous occasions when I haven’t been able to see the way out. The funny thing about life is you never know what’s round the corner. Please don’t give up hope. As Annie says, please be very careful of what you take. Some herbal things react with other meds. Hope you feel happier soon. x

Annie sounds like you are resigned to getting the enablers back. Hope they manage to get you going out etc.

Ellie Anne it is easy to mess up your system with over the counter 'health' supplements, they can cause problems with other meds so please talk to your pharmacist before taking them.

Doodle so pleased DH got a good nights sleep. Yes, understand the worries about loved ones. When I wake in the night and can't be sure DH is breathing I have to put my hand on his back and just check!!

Had my hearing test, no issues and was even talked into having NHS aids to try rather than paying for private. Also went into a new bank to set up an account, what a hassle and then had an email from them giving me an appointment to go into another branch, further away, for an hour's appointment taking all the documents I had already taken in which they scanned. 15 minutes waiting on phone and still no solution. Question: do I really want to go back out into the real world with all the faffing or shall I just become a hermit!

I was fine, no qualms about doing both those but then decided to look round M & S while waiting for DH to collect me. Couldn't do it, not crowded, just didn't feel right. Think it might be a long time before I do anything non-essential on my own.

Morning all x Sunny if chilly day. Yes I’m back to my usual logical self, my DH calls me ‘Mr Spock’ and I aim to live up to that nickname. Having said that, I feel sad about prince Philip, even though he was a great age, and they were very fortunate in having each other for so long, the Queen still lost her lifelong partner. Talking about herbal supplements I was wondering whether anybody has tried St John’s Wort to lift their mood. Nonnie I feel the same way, is there any point in doing anything in person when they got us used to do it online? You are right it’ll be a long time before we feel ready to go back to ‘normal’.
Hope you’ll all have a peaceful day x

Hi all x

nonnie resigned ? no choice so another case of acceptance ,
10 weeks on the sofa and rather worrying that I am now use to it.

BlueSky I think we will have to adjust to ‘a new normal’ , if
thinking of taking St,John’s Wort, it does have side effects and don’t take it with any other medication, some have found it
helpful but like all medication what doesn’t work for some helps others x

Annie I’m amazed that nobody is worrying about you sleeping on the sofa, which we know it’s only meant for the occasional night!

It’s not St. John’s wort. Can’t remember the name but I’ve had other things from health span and they are ok. Maybe some info will come with it

Annie- you are right having the second jab will enable us to see family and friends who we have missed so much.
I do hope that the next chair you are offered is the right size and that the next lot of enablers actually live up to their title. You so deserve a comfortable nights sleep in your own bed. You have put up with this situation with such patience.
Ellie Anne- please be careful with your meds. Herbal doesn’t always mix safely with other medication. Hope you are ok today.
Doodle- so happy to hear your DH has had a good sleep,at last. Tonight you will both sleep soundly I hope.
Nonnie- don,t become a hermit!! You did so well yesterday- I think faffing is something we will all have to get used to again. It’s funny but when I go to my local M&S I only go to the food hall - not ready for the rest yet. I hope we will get our confidence back so we can do some of the things we have missed so much. Oh for a day with my daughter mooching in the shops and coffee and lunch. Or just not being so scared all the time.
Blue Sky- I really don’t want to keep doing everything on line- I,m sick of ‘virtual’ food shopping although am still so grateful for it at the moment. I want to feel like myself again .
I too feel sad for the Queen - she must feel very alone. What a character he was - we will miss him
Take care allxx

Nonnie this lockdown has had quite an impact on our lives. We have been told to avoid people for so long it’s no wonder we get a bit anxious when we find ourselves getting closer to people. What a kerfuffle you had with the bank. Technology is supposed to make life easier but rarely does.
Hope the hearing aid works well for you. When do you get it ?
Bluesky I was very shocked when I heard about Prince Philip too. Don’t know why when he was 99 but just didn’t expect it I suppose.
I don’t know any who have taken St John’s wort but I have heard about it. I do know there are many medications which you aren’t supposed to take with it, please be careful you don’t make yourself ill.
Annie I hope that new smaller chair comes soon. Will that enable you to get to bed?
Scaredycatthank you. Yes we both slept last night. Bliss.?
I find online shopping boring. I’ve got to the age and size where I need to try things on to make sure they fit. I can’t be bothered with the faff of sending them back. I would rather wait till I feel like shopping in person whenever that may be.
Sleep well all x

BlueSky please be careful with St John's Wort, I think you need the advice of your pharmacist as it can have a negative effect on some things. I think thyroid function is one of them.

Scardycat yes, I think you understand. My daughter in law and I have talked about mooching round the shops together but I think that will have to wait a while, she is more ready than me I think.

Doodle the hearing aid thing is another faff! I had to phone the doctor to get him to refer me, daft as we don't have to do that for an eye test! When the doc refers the hearing people will let me know and I will go in and have moulds made for the aids. I have no idea how long that takes, so in the meantime I will continue to try to keep the old ones on with specs and a mask! If I did the whole thing privately it would cost £2k so it is worth a try with the NHS ones first.

Just opened some online shopping, I seem to have bought 2 of the same thing

My positive today. I know I have said it before but it is worth saying again. Many of the things you all say resonate strongly with me so I feel it could be helpful to reiterate that I was ill, very, very ill but am now so improved that I lead a normal life and am able to do things for others. Yes, at times I am still very fragile but I am grateful that I survived it all and can assure you that it can be done. No magic wand but please accept any and all help offered, wherever it comes from. You may be surprised at who is there for you. xx

Evening all. Not done much today. Went for a walk and had a long chat with a neighbour. Read the Sunday papers and had hot cross buns for lunch. That about sums it up?
Nonnie sorry the hearing aids aren’t that easy to come by. I can understand it’s worth trying the NHS ones. The private ones aren’t cheap are they. Hope you get your appointment soon.
What an uplifting post. It does us good to hear of your story. I am so pleased that you feel life is better now.
Annie hope your MT is able to visit you soon. Have you had any help in today?
Hope the gang all are ok, sleep well all x

Hi all x

How is everyone?

iPad has problems and mini tornado can’t come up to sort it out, my post yesterday didn’t post.

*nonnie, I did like your positive but must add - help is not always out there when it comes to my physiotherapy dept !