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Heavy handed bully of a hospital security man

(38 Posts)
merlotgran Wed 30-Dec-20 17:30:53

DH is almost at the end of a course of radiotherapy for bladder cancer. He is also registered blind (no peripheral vision) and has severe heart failure (cannot walk very far)

We've been attending outpatients/oncology for five weeks and appreciate the need for security at the main entrance due to Covid restrictions but our treatment this morning was beyond belief!

The journey to Addenbrooke's hospital takes just under an hour so by the time we got there DH was desperate for the loo. He wears a pad as a precaution. I always drop him off as close to the door as possible (the loos are just inside) then go and park the car. He doesn't need an appointment card, just a schedule which I keep in my handbag.

I don't want to go into explicit details on an open site but in short, the security man refused to let me in because, in HIS opinion, DH didn't need a carer or a wheelchair (I had to nip next door to another clinic to collect one because the ones in outpatients were chained up!) because he'd seen him walk from the car.

An argument ensued, I eventually walked in unchallenged because I waited until he bullied somebody else and his back was turned. We got to DH's appointment just in time and left the rest to an appalled radiographer who phoned security straight away.

By the time we got back to outpatients, two security men were dealing with him! I hope he's toast! One of them was kind enough to follow us out to the car and apologise.

I appreciate hospitals are under extreme pressure at the moment but employing 'bouncers' to fill the void is not a good idea. He was so horrible, one woman sat outside on a bench sobbing because, in her words, she'd been 'ejected!'

I've e-mailed my complaint to PALS. Hopefully better luck next week!

Chewbacca Wed 30-Dec-20 20:16:58

Really sorry you've had to go through this merlot; attending hospital at any time is stressful enough without having to sidestep a bloke who thinks he's a bouncer at a nightclub. You've done the right thing in escalating it to PALS and they should get back to you with their findings in about 28 days. The current situation seems to have brought out the very worst in some people who appear to have been waiting for this very moment to be made to feel so important.
During lockdown #1 I had a similar experience in a local Tesco Express store when a security guard was under the impression that he had to follow customers out into the car park and photograph them and their car registration plates. He only lasted 1 day!

dragonfly46 Wed 30-Dec-20 20:20:43

I am so sorry you experienced this Merlot. It is totally unacceptable. I wish your DH well with his radiotherapy. He will be pleased when it is over I know.

Luckygirl Wed 30-Dec-20 21:01:21

Well - neither of you needed that! I know that feeling of having an ailing partner and having to clear their way through the various systems that they need to engage with - battle their way through might be a better expression.

I seemed to spend all my time fighting for my OH's rights and his well-being; I know that sense of the inner tigress that emerges. How sad that this is sometimes necessary with those services whose raison d'etre is to be of help.

I am so sorry you have this problem today and hope very much that it is not repeated.

merlotgran Wed 30-Dec-20 21:37:55

My inner tigress is a force to be reckoned with when backed into a corner.

Shouldn't be necessary when DH has received so much support and excellent treatment. He's a brave and positive man so heaven help any ignorant and unfeeling 'jobsworth' who thinks he can flex his muscles in an outpatients department full of fragile and vulnerable people.

I was staying calm until I asked politely who would push the wheelchair if I wasn't allowed in.

His reply?

'He doesn't need a wheelchair. He can walk.' angry angry

It gave me great pleasure to watch him walking away from his job!

MissAdventure Wed 30-Dec-20 21:44:20

Oh, I'm mad on your behalf!

Nicegranny Wed 30-Dec-20 22:36:22

This post brought tears to my eyes reading how vulnerable people are being bullied and upset by ignorant thicko’s supposedly working alongside frontline people at hospitals.
I always feel compelled to defend the defenceless and could not standby and see anyone hurt by this kind of behaviour. I’d have to say something to the offending “bouncer” and call the police. These types of security men should be posted at A&E on Friday and Saturday night’s to protect the staff from the awful drunks and druggies that turn up.

Grandmafrench Thu 31-Dec-20 00:17:26

"He doesn't need a wheelchair, he can walk!"

Ah, so now we can assume that the offensive oik on the door was probably a Doctor, Merlot. ? If I'd had that wheelchair, he'd have had tyre marks all up his bouncer's vest!

Feel lots better soon, Mr Merlot. Nighty night, both. Sleep well.

Ailsa43 Thu 31-Dec-20 02:13:05

I'm reading this with a huge lump in my throat and tears ready to fall .. what a horrific, and stressful occurrence. I'm just angry on behalf for you and your husband ., as if you don't have enough to cope with, you had to stand up to a complete and utter waste of oxygen angry

heavensjoys Thu 31-Dec-20 03:18:49

Tears for me too, Merlot. Just an awful experience for you and your husband. So sorry you had to go through that.

Just reminded me of many years ago, when my dear husband was in hospital. The amazing car par attendant (a saint) ‘allowed’ me in the evenings to park in the empty Consultants’ spaces, after a long drive from work to visit DH. I will never ever forget that lovely man’s kindness.

Nezumi65 Thu 31-Dec-20 07:08:40

I used to know a big burly security man who was terrified of being kicked in the shins - you should have done it merlotgran.

I had to accompany someone to the hospital this week. They had a nurse sat outside the department doing all the Covid screening stuff. Far more sensible.

CatNurse Sun 13-Jun-21 22:00:21

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our forum guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Callistemon Sun 13-Jun-21 22:28:09

Reported.