Black Dog 12

EllieAnne- belated HappyBirthday for yesterday. It’s sad that you felt unhappy at the end of your day- so good to have visits from Both your sons and their families. Maybe your daughter was unhappy that she couldn’t be there too.
Are any of us pleased with how we look? As we getolder it’s like a stranger looking back at you in the mirror but probably those we love don’t even notice and other people don’t matter.
To me you are all lovely people.
Violet Sky has the right idea- treat yourself to something you want- not need and enjoy it.
Doodle- so glad you re feeling better and DH too.
My sister takes mega loads of medication and her husband has organised it really well. Every evening before I go to bed I get the next days meds ready and put them in a little pot. But I have made really daft mistakes occasionally?
I darent look forward too much to seeing my son as I always expect something to go wrong and I want to see him so badly.
HVDY- good idea to have a bit of a lazy day -you do so much. Hope your eyes feel better soon - it’s horrible when they feel scratchy isn’t it. Maybe Mr Cooper was a bit dusty!!
SweetPeaSue- losing a long post is,soooo annoying- I do it so often . I think I preview then forget to post!
Glad you have your counsellor appointment - it will do you good to get everything off your chest to someone who will listen without prejudice.
I,m sorry the pain is back today. Try to take one day at a time and just have a rest today then maybe the pain will recede so you can go out on Tuesday.
We are here to listen please don’t suffer on your own.
VioletSky-good to see your positives-lovely to do things with your daughters.
Hope today brings something nice for you too.
Annie- love your new rule.
all the lovely people here deal with so much every day - it should be pride not shame.
I feel cross like SweetPeaSue that you have to battle so hard for every little thing. Hate to think of you feeling unhappy.
Walked this morning with DD - it was warm but there was the carrot of a coffee and biscuits at the end so couldn’t resist.
Love to allxxx

Scaredycat Oh I really do hope you see your son again after such a long time. Facetime is an amazing thing but you will want to FEEL a hug from him. I know I love to have a hug from mine. They think I'm so sentimental but I fight tears when my eldest son leaves. I so want you to see him, I'm sure you will. I know what you mean about being afraid of the certainty in case of disappointment. So hard during lock down and covid for families living abroad. Do you have long left now before your visit. Sorry if you've said. I can't scroll back as I'll lose my post. I'm going to have to try and use my husband's tablet but it's ancient so it's a bit awkward. I know what's happening with this phone. I think I try and scroll upwards and there's not much room between the 'post' and the 3 red dotted lines at bottom of previous post. I catch those then try to get the screen back with post on it by going backwards, then my post has disappeared!

It was lovely day yesterday. The girls and grandchildren and girlfriends little girl went for a walk to our village pond. We walked around it and fed the wildlife on it, took photos of the children. All while my son's watched the football. Then my son did a barbie, we all pitched in. Children played so well together. We did some quizzes later and had a drink. Such laughter. So happy to see the brothers together. I just needed a small break of an hr when I came home during the day as I didn't want to upset things but my pain was nothing like today. I managed to keep it from them yesterday but it was impossible today but I got out as soon as I could.
HVDY I hope your eyes feel better tomorrow. Surely you can't be allergic to Mr Cooper, has it happened before? Maybe the right sort of eyedrops will help. Hope your GDs are having a good holiday.

SweetpeaSue That day with your family sounds perfect. It's lovely to see the grandchildren, isn't it? And good that your sons saw each other too. I've had this thing with my eyes before. It might be the cat that caused it - cats have dander on their fur, so it may be that. I've been bathing my eyes. The GDs are back tomorrow night, I think, then they'll be here on Tues(?) for 4 nights. Their dad, my Son1, has got the week off work x

It was perfect HVDY.?Your GDs will have so much news for you. Oh don't let the eyes be Mr Cooper. ?

Had a quiet day today. Waiting delivery for a drawer unit that didn’t come and present for DIL which did but I don’t like it so it’s going back. DH been quiet and not coughing much which is good.
Sweetpeasue sounds like you had a good day yesterday. What a lovely time all your family had.
Sorry you ended up with a headache. So pleased you have an appointment with the counsellor soon. I hope that helps.
No need to stop posting. You can tell us how you’re feeling so don’t worry.
What a shame your day with your family was spoilt by the pain again. You are not bringing us down you are just explaining how you feel, we care for you and want to listen.
Your DGDs will have cheered you up I’m sure.
Hope you are feeling better tonight.
HVDY sorry about your eyes. Is it likely to be Mr Cooper or a hayfever type allergy?
Hope they feel better soon. I hate having sore eyes. Try bathing them in some low salt water.
I expect you’ve missed your DGDs whIle they’ve been away. Hope they had a good time. You son will be pleased to have them back.
Annie I’m doing ok thanks for asking. Covid is easing off now and DH is feeling better. I’m still in worry mode but fingers crossed things will be ok.
I find it really frustrating and hard to believe that you cannot get more help. I know the NHS is struggling but you should be a priority after all you’ve been through. I hope your DGD manages to move back home soon.
Scaredycat I’m a pessimist too. I wish I wasn’t. I do hope you get to see your son. Can imagine how much you are looking forward to it. Glad you had a nice walk with your Dd and a coffee and biscuits to follow.
It’s so warm here not sure I’ll sleep well tonight.
Violetsky and Ellie Anne how have you been today?

So good for everyone to see their loved ones. We lost so much during the pandemic and its really hard to transition back to normal life.

My day has been OK, made a cake and looking forward to a trip to the coast tomorrow.

I won't be going into the water, I remember when you could see your feet.

Happy Sunday everyone

Doodle and SweetpeaSue My eyes are sore either because of Mr Cooper, or due to a mascara (although I haven't worn any since Friday). I'll take some antihistamines at bedtime.

VioletSky Enjoy your day at the coast tomorrow. The weather should be good.

Anniebach How have you been today?

I hope everyone on BD has a restful night x

VioletSky An OK day can feel quite acceptable can't it after a low one.
I usually bake scones when I feel lost. Lots of them and freeze them and feed my husband with them. Cheese, Cherry, Date n walnut.
Hope you have a nice day by the sea tomorrow.
HVDY Antihistamines are the one thing that usually do what it says on the tin. Crossed fingers.

Is it a recent allergy?

I know 2 people who have started to get a lot of eye irritation since covid, I think it can trigger dormant things

SweetpeaSue Thanks. I was up at 4.30, then 6.30. My eyes feel gritty, so I think it must be Conjunctivitis.

VioletSky No, I've had this many times before, nothing to do with Covid.

I've just been trying to book a hot air balloon trip (it was a joint birthday present for my husband and me in April). The earliest now is October, at 7am (be there for 6), the nearest place is Derbyshire (we're in Nottingham), so we'll need to leave the house at 5 that day

I hope you find some relief soon, a hot air balloon sounds incredible!

Hi all x

My stress levels are aiming for the ceiling, house hunting ,
studio flat hunting, trying to find a carer who will do weekends,

Boys from a nearby estate have chosen the large grass area by
my bungalow to play football, Lottie is not amused so very vocal and Rosie who loves balls is also very vocal.

How is everyone ?

SweetPeaSue- what a lovely time you all had on Saturday- I,m so happy for you. It’s so good to see your family all together - it doesn’t happen with us often as our children are all scattered about. Yes the emotion involved in saying goodbye can be unbearable at times but it is the price we pay for the lovely times. Don’t know how I,ll cope with that this time though.
Yours scones sound lovely and it’s a really wonderful way to deal with stress. Hope you don’t have to bake too many though!!
HVDY- Derbyshire will be a lovely place to have your hot air balloon trip - it is so beautiful. Hope your eyes feel better today it makes them feel so tired when they are sore doesn’t it.
Doodle- A quiet day does you good sometimes doesn’t it- it,ll help you get some strength back from being poorly. I feel for you waiting for a delivery that doesn’t come. It is one of the most annoying things especially if you have had to wait in all day.
VioletSky- I agree with you it has been hard to try and get back to a normal life after the last couple of years. It really has taken confidence away and I personally still feel fearful . It’s better now but it still lurks especially when there are more people around. I try not to let it spoil doing things though as life is for living. I,m glad you had a good day and hope you have a great day at the seaside today. I love to paddle no matter what and my feet go in the sea whenever I can get them in!!
Annie- wish I could help you bring your stress levels back down to earth. Are you helping your DGD to find a new home?
It would be so good for you to have a weekend carer - it would be company for awhile and also you need the help. ??
Maybe your little dogs are singing doggy football songs! Hope the ball doesn’t keep flying into your garden!!
Joce,EllieAnne and all take carexx

Anniebach Are you looking for a place for your granddaughter? Did she ask you to look, or is it that you want to help? Property is hard to come by, and so expensive (hence why Son1 is still living with us )

Have you approached any care agencies about a weekend carer? They charge more, but all agencies have weekend staff (I used to work on Christmas Day and all bank holidays as well as alternate weekends)

I hope the boys will be going home soon, for their tea.......

It's very warm here. The cat has been lounging about in the garden since 7am! (the door has been open all day but he hasn't been in yet). I don't like the heat.

How has everyone been?

Annie I’m so sorry you are feeling so stressed. I hope those boys aren’t causing you too much trouble.
You are trying to help both your granddaughters which they must appreciate. Is your carer leaving? I hope not as you got on well.
Violetsky a trip to the coast would be lovely. I love the sea.
You don’t have to go into the water but a paddle might be nice. I always have a paddle when I go to the beach.
HVDY sorry your eyes are giving you such a problem. It could be conjunctivitis. Do you have anything you can take for it. I hope you have a better night tonight.
Wow a hot air balloon. That’s exciting. It’s an early start but I expect the views will be lovely when you get to go.
Sweetpeasue how are you today after your busy weekend? Is your headache any better.
Scaredycat have you been out today? I went into town earlier to the post office. It was so hot in the car. Couldn’t ait to get home. Had the exciting delivery of an 8 drawer unit today to put all my sewing things in. Keep changing my mind as to what should go in what drawer ?

Realised I hadn't explained about yesterday. We were all to go to a park and while they were getting ready I suddenly felt severe pain. Had to leave and come home. Pain got much worse so had to take much more Oramorph than usual but it hardly touched it. By night it was just about OK but I was up and down stairs the whole night. Never slept at all. Managed to see my GP this afternoon with DH, pain today and took more painkiller to get there. Prescribed more Oramorph and writing to Consultant again. He'd not replied to her last letter or my messages. Not been able to see my family today. GP says if pain is really very bad to go to A&E. I just don't think he'll bring my op forward now. I'm really sorry to be pessimistic but Im thinking the worst for myself. My son told husband yesterday it was bizarre how suddenly my pain came on. Its not the usual way of things. I can't even say I can take my Gdaughter out tomorrow as Id told her mum when I was well. I'll have to wait until tomorrow to see if my pain stays away but DH would have to accompany us as I'd not risk anything now the way things are.
I wasn't sure if I should post because I know how it sounds. I'm quite dopey with meds so managing not to panic at at moment but I'm anything but calm inside. Beginning to realise just how much my condition will affect family and I loathe it. No good me being in pain in front of them though.
Sorry for not addressing you all. I really don't know where to turn. DH hopes to get a steroid injection on Wednesday for his hip.
I do care about you all. Xx

Had a good day, very tired. Won lots of tickets at the amusements so picked up some sensory toys for school.

Hope you find your forever home Anniebach

Hope you get some help soon Sweetpeasue

Violetsky glad you had a good day. Do you work at a school?
I think Annie is looking for a house for her elder DGD to move in and a studio for her younger DGD Violetsky I don’t think Annie is moving herself.
Sweetpeasue what a shame you day was spoilt by the pain again. I’m sorry that all I can do is sympathise. I wish I could get you a hospital appointment with someone who could help. I’m not surprised you get close to panic it’s been going on for so long now. I hope this time the Consultant replies to your GP and you get seen. Wish I could magic all your troubles away.
Thinking of you and praying for you x

So sorry, my brain is so foggy and it was a lot today, house hunting is so hard

I'm a teaching assistant SEN and emotional support

I seem to be able to set everything aside at work, pain and tiredness so it doesn't impact my job thankfully. I'm also not neurotypical so when I get home I tend to wobble a bit, especially after a day of flashing lights, noise, seagulls and wind

Violetsky my DGS is the same. He’s not affected too much by noise though which is just as well as he’s not quiet ?

Hello everyone I hope you are all doing well. Xx

I thought you might like to see how binks the feral is doing ( the black one)

Doodle I've been taking antihistamines at night, and I bought some eye drops today. If my eyes are still like this tomorrow, I'll ring the doctor and get a prescription for different drops (I've had this many times) I hope the treatment your husband had recently has made him feel better.

SweetpeaSue I'm so sorry that you're having all this pain, and that the problem has been going on for so long. It's really having an impact on your life, and that's not right. I wish there was something I could say or do, but I really do sympathise.

Nanny2507 Both your cats are gorgeous. They love each other, don't they

It's been too hot for my liking. It's so humid. Mr Cooper had his teatime meal (fresh turkey) outside, under the patio table. He came in briefly for his supper half an hour ago, but apart from that, he's been dozing in the garden all day - he's going to have to come in for bed in an hour. That won't please him. Hope everyone manages to get a decent night's rest x

I am a sucker for their charms. Binks keeps showing me his belly. I keep touching it...I get thumped. But I cant help myself! Its such a beautiful belly. I have 7 cats now.

HVDY Thankyou. Yes, so long. 2 yrs in October since the investigative hysteroscopy for a bit of postmenopausal, one off 'spotting'.
October 5th when the next op is now due. There's nothing anyone can say, I know that.

Good luck with the Balloon Trip. How exciting.