Black Dog 15

Hi all
EllieAnne- so sorry to,hear you are feeling low and hope today has been a better one for you. Is your GD still learning to ride ?
Doodle- I saw snowdrops today - a lovely carpet of them and thought of Annie too- I do hope she is ok.
Fingers crossed the consultant will reply to your Email quickly.
Better news of my sister this morning. She is being moved to the rehab wing of her hospital. There she will have her own room with more comfortable bed and the physios will be able to start helping her. She cannot stand or walk unaided so it,ll be a big change for her - at least I hope so. Good news as well her cancer has not come back as we feared.
Hope you and DH have a peaceful nightxx
SweetPeaSue- those dreams that stay with you are so unsettling aren’t they. Hope you had a better night last night and the pain abated.
Sorry you had bad news about your niece hope all is well,soon and that you were able to help your son. So awful when those we love are in any trouble.
Wyllow- I,m glad you had a good session with your psychologist and feel reassured.
HVDY- it’s good that your DH is relaxed at home but I,m sure he,ll be happy to get his cough sorted and get back to work again.
Have you gone for a new look at the hairdressers?
I have been drying stuff indoors this winter but today was lovely and springlike wasn’t it. Your linen will have that lovely fresh air smell🙂
Wishing all a peaceful nightxx

Wyllow Pleased you were able to have a talk with psychologist and sounds reassuring that you'll not be discharged any time soon. Hope your tummy is a bit more comfortable today. Also that it wont be long before you get some feedback consultant after talking to secretary.
Doodle I hope you both had a better night and your husbandsRLS wasnt so bad. He must dread going to bed in case it starts. I have snowdrops too now in garden. Thankyou yes son's ok. I'm sure niece will be too after an op in few weeks.
HVDY Hope you're pleased with your cut. Was it the nice Italian man again? Bright here too.
Candy I'm really sorry about those awful feelings of 'oddness'. I hope its not been as bad today. I can remember that awful feeling of not 'being there' and feeling sure everyone else would see my state. Looking in the mirror feels like seeing a ghost. It can be very frightening if that lasts a while. The snowdrops were a nice thing to notice on that sad day of your father's funeral. I think that memory must bring a smile years afterwards. I hope today's been a better day for you.
Scaredycat Thinking of you and hoping for good news about your sister.

Sharp boreing pain low down in night and lasted all day. Bowel so 'tight' too. Hopefully will go soon. Think its bladder pain but the bowel pain seems to accompany it. I dont want to be scared about it but just wish I knew what it was. Painkillers and hot water bottle. Sorry for moaning.
Sending love to all on BD or reading. Thinking of you all.

Scaredycat Oh thats wonderful news about your sister! You must be so pleased about it. She sounds very frail but once the physio starts I hope she will improve. The more comfortable bed should help too. Thankyou for letting us know. Hope your AF has not been too troubling today. x

Oh my goodness Scaredycat what….amazing news…you must be pinching yourself to take it all on board! Just..wow.

I’m writing this with a curious image of a Chopped Mop HVDY. Glad, btw, MrHVDY isn’t depressed.

Candy sweet pondering on snowdrops. And a future where you have “gym friends” as in dip in and out…nice swim there.
When to take anti-d’s….if they are the sedating sort an hour before bed is good, but I don’t know enough about your particular drug.
Interesting reflection…..“it was the brain’s way of cutting off the anxiety”.
Well true enough, but it depends on the degree of unreality, how long It goes on for, and how used one is to it ie being able to know it for what it is, and have coping strategies.

Sweetpeasue indeed, “nail on head” there…knowing what it is. You are not moaning, it hurts, you’re scared.

I think it was talking to the psychologist, but today my head has not only been a Loy less anxious but I actually - gasp- enjoyed (can this be me?) a walk in the Bot Gardens and then a coffee at the woodland centre all in the sun, yes lots of snowdrops.
Letter from consultant - he will arrange a phone call to discuss “what next”. I missed a phone from his secretary during sleep, annoying as she might have made a date, but still, clearly I feel “heard”.

Thoughts to Ellie-Anne as you are having a bad time, and to Doodle with the everyday difficulties that weigh heavy, and all other BD's, present, past, and those just reading.

Wyllow Oh thats really good. You have results from your call to secretary. Hope you can have contact again soon, after the missed call.
Yojr walk in the Bot gardens sounded lovely. Nature seems to have a way of reaching us when other things fail. Sounded just perfect. Spring is definitely just around the corner!

Not counting my chickens, but a good day is a good day. I don't trust my brain to keep it that way, but that's understood in BD's...

HVDY we were both up walking around again last night. Tonight doesn’t look too good DHs is already suffering from irritation and it’s not even 9pm. It really aggravates him so much.
I’m glad your DH doesn’t get breathless or wheezy. Perhaps it’s some virus or other. Your DH is probably enjoying the rest.
Spoke to asthma nurse this morning and she has prescribed an additional inhaler that DH has to use only once a day in the morning. We will start that tomorrow.
Candy I’m allergic to tree pollens too. Only really discovered it when we moved here. Your right though, some antihistamine tablets might help.
Nice to link your dad with something pretty like snowdrops. My link to mine is daffodils. Firstly because he was welsh and secondly because he grew so many in his garden.
Glad you enjoyed your swim.
Scaredycat that is good news about your sister and the cancer. Also that she will have a room of her own and more access to physio. That should help her get a better nights sleep and more one to one attention. It has been a sunny warm day today. I walked to the chemist to pick up DHs new inhaler and I got quite warm ……..guess I didn’t really need my thick scarf I had on. 🥵
Sweetpeasue hoping for a better night tonight. DH is already in bed. Couldn’t stand the irritation any more. I’m hoping it wears off and he can get some sleep. Poor man fell asleep in his dinner several times tonight.
You are not moaning. Pain like you experience is not nice especially when you are wondering what causes it. Hope it’s better now.
Hope your niece gets her op soon.
Wyllow what a lovely post from you. Good to hear you had a better day and enjoyed a walk in the sunshine. I love woodlands. Hope you get that call soon.
Ellie Anne we’re all thinking of you. Hope today has been better.
Sleep well all.

Wyllow one good day means you can have more. 😊 💕

Doodle Oh no. I keep saying I'm so sorry for what he's suffering but I am. Its just beyond belief that people have to suffer so much right now! I will pray for him Doodle. Sending love.
That last post to Wyllow was so encouraging, to myself too. Thankyou. x

Thank you Sweetpeasue he’s already been up. Just been rubbing his legs with a bag of frozen broad beans which helped a bit. I’ve ordered a cold wrap from Amazon to see if that helps. Hope you sleep ok

Doodle and MrD xxxx

ScaredyCat Great news about your sister. Being moved to a rehab wing and getting physio all point towards trying to get her home. That's good. I had a cut and had it layered.

SweetpeaSue Yes, the lovely Italian man always does my hair. You aren't moaning - you're in pain and don't know why it keeps happening. You're bound to feel scared.

Wyllow I always say I'm getting my mop chopped. Son1 calls it having his wigpiece done. I'm so pleased you had a good day and enjoyed being out in the nice weather. We have to make the most of good days when we can, don't we? I hope the consultant is in touch again soon.

Doodle I'm so sorry you and your DH keep having bad nights. You must both be so tired. The poor man, he suffers such a lot.

EllieAnne Thinking of you, hope you're ok.

Candy6, Whiff and others - hope you'll all ok.
I hope everyone manages to have a decent day today. x

Afternoon all,
HVDY thanks for tip about the ADs. I’ll try and take it a bit later and see if that helps. I hope you’re pleased with your new hair cut.
Scaredycat I’m glad you’ve had good news about your sister. It must be very reassuring.
Sweetpeasue Thankfully feelings only mild today and I’m grateful for that. A friend called in this morning for coffee and she hasn’t long started on the same AD so it was reassuring having a chat with her about everything. Met up with my 2 older brothers earlier which was nice. I’m supporting them with issues they’ve got a the moment which is a bit ironic as they seem to be in a better place mentally than me! Still, I know they would be there for me too if I really needed them. Off to a reunion with some old work colleagues this evening so a busy, busy day for me! I hope your pain has eased. You are not moaning, you’re in pain and it’s understandable. I sincerely hope it’s all resolved soon.
Wyllow I think we all like our snowdrops. Such beautiful little things. Yes, having coping strategies is important even though sometimes, they seem to go out of the window when things are bad. Sometimes we just have to dig a bit deeper I think. I’m glad you had a good day and hope your good feelings have continued. I hope you’ve heard back from the consultants secretary too.
Doodle I like daffodils too. My friend who called around earlier brought me a bunch - so lovely. I hope your DH is ok and you both managed some rest. You must be exhausted.
Ellie Anne hope you are ok and everyone else on here too.
Take care everyone xx

Doodle I saw your late post. I do hope he managed to get back to bed and get comfortable later. I didnt know about the cold compresses. Hope the broad bean pack helped. (the packs are more compact than peas!)
HVDY Hope your day has been ok, and you get some help tomorrow at Dr's.
Candy That was fortunate to see a friend who understands about the same ADs. It must have been reassuring. I think it must be very natural to feel wary with any new meds. A busy day for you today. Hope the reunion with old work colleagues was ok.

Pain still there and up at 4 with it. Bowel just feels seized and extended with sharp pain on and off. Know my GP usually on Friday. Just called surgery in case its still there tomorrow. We're not allowed to pre-book so was going to join queue at 8am.Shes on holiday for 2 weeks. 🙄
Hope everyone is ok and your days have been ok. X. Grumpeasue.

Grumpeasue!!!! I like that but it’s not true. You and the others soldier on through all your difficulties.
I’m ok. Tired but coping. Choir starts up again tonight so that should help.
Good news about your sister scaredy-cat.

Candy6 I usually just have my hair thinned-out at the back, and layers put in all over. It's curly, doesn't need a lot of faffing with. It's nice of you to help your brothers - I help mine, emotionally, when I can, and of course, I take SIL to the day centre on Thursdays, to give my brother 6 hours' break. (unlike your brothers, mine has never reciprocated in any way at all) Hope you have a very nice evening at your reunion.

SweetpeaSue Thanks, I'll do all the talking when DH sees the GP tomorrow . Sorry you're still in pain. Could you see a different GP? (The best GP at our surgery is never available - the next appointment with her would be April).

EllieAnne Have a good choir practice. Singing is good for low mood, apparently.

Doodle How are you and your husband?
Wyllow How's your day been?
ScaredyCat, Whiff and others - hope you've all been ok today.

Took my SIL to day centre - it was a roast pork dinner, but neither of us like pork, so we had a vegetarian breadcrumbed "thing", which was ok. Son gone to his GF's and won't be back until Sunday evening (he's seeing her a lot now, which is good - he bought her some nice maternity pyjamas and dressing gown . Hope everyone has a relaxing evening x

HVDY Shame about Pork dinner-I'm not keen either. If still like this tomortow will have to see other Dr but none of them know my complicated history. GPs usually wont let us talk for them(DHs) so I usually try to give 'paddington stares' or stary eyes if Ithink mine's going off track. He somehow got onto talking about migraines he used to get at 16, when we saw specialist about UTI. Consultant seemed too interested and I could see the incident being blamed on a migraine attack when last 1 he had was over 50 yrs ago and he only ever had 2 then! Good luck.
EllieAnne Thankyou but I know what a struggle your day to day life can be. Lovely to be part of a choir, it must be such a nice gift to be able to sing. I wish I could. I love choirs and harmony but my voice is flat as a pancake. Hope you it tonight EllieAnne.

Hoping everyone is ok. X

enjoy

Ellie Anne I hope you make it to the choir and its uplifting.

Candy nicer day there!

Sweetpeasue that made me smile no you are not a grumppeasue and the very best in the morning.

Bests to all BD's in here and just reading, tired tonight, OK enough day.

Wyllow Hope you have a restful night. Love. X

Another night of walking around last night. I also now think my DH is suffering from swallowing difficulties. He has for some time had bouts of coughing after swallowing water but it seems to be getting worse.
He has done his physio exercises today so is tired. We will just have to see what sort of night we have.
Candy it’s good to have advice from others who have similar medication or problems. Sharing helps us all.
Nice you get on with your brothers and you are all helping each other. My brother was really nice too.
Hope you enjoy your reunion. Have a good evening.
Sweetpeasue the cold wrap has arrived and is in the freezer waiting to see if we need it later. DH thinks I’m mad to buy it but I’ll try anything if it gives him some relief.
Sorry about the pain and unpleasant feeling. You still have a sense of humour though. You are not grumpeasue 🤣. You have every right to say how you feel. No need to put on a front in here.
Ellie Anne hope you enjoy your choir practise. What sort of things do you sing?
HVdY your hair sounds nice and easy to style. Your brother is lucky you help out so much with your SIL.
Hope all goes well with the GP tomorrow and you can get some proper help for your DH.
Singing might be good for low mood but not if you’d heard me singing 😲
Really good news things are working out better between your son and his GF. Nice he’s thinking of her and helping.
Sweetpeasue I know GPS want patients to speak for themselves but I often talk for my DH (don’t tell me, you aren’t surprised 😊) . I always suggest to DH that he concentrates only on the actual problem and basic fact and try not to ramble. I usually give my DH a pep talk before going to the GP. Sort of like they’re short of time. Stick to the point. Tell them what the real problem is.
Wyllow you sound really tired. Hope you are relaxing and manage a good night. Glad your day was ok.

SweetpeaSue I hope you get on ok tomorrow.
Doodle Oh no, how much more can your poor DH stand? The difficulty with swallowing sounds odd - perhaps speak to the GP about that, if it continues. I really hope you both manage to have a more restful night.
Wyllow Have a good rest.
EllieAnne Hope the singing went well.

Going to bed a bit earlier tonight. My ankles and lower leg ache and throb (I didn't ever have that until "they" put me on BP tablets - I might stop taking them).

Hope everyone has a good night's sleep x

Doodle I sincerely hope you dont need the frozen wrap tonight. But, you're prepared and good for you, you are trying everything. I do hope you both get peace tonight. 🙏
HVDY Do sympathise. So much medication have side effects. Hope you get relief from your leg ache probs tonight.

Oh Doodle things really aren't good I do feel concerned about MrD.

HVDY they can lead to some really difficult choices, side effects versus relief. (temporarily, can you lie on your back with legs right up?)

(I got the go-ahead yesterday to ring pharmacology dept in MH yesterday if other tests don't prove helpful tum wise, but we are talking drugs very long term and not necessarily alternatives. But generally, it seems to me that as we get older we are trying to balance need and helpful drugs and each body different and so on and so on.....and it takes a long time to sort out)

Doodle I can choke on my own salvia ,food and drink. It's because of my HPX our oesophagus goes into spasm which ends up me feeling like I am coughing my lungs up 😁. Your husband's may be doing that. My sister in law has MS same thing happens to her . I find eating softer food makes swallowing easier. I have porridge for breakfast,homemade soup for lunch which is also blended and some sort of either a chicken which I shred into tiny pieces or Quorn mince,chicken pieces or sausage cut up stew for my dinner. Bread sticks in my throat so if I have bread it's broken up in my soup or stew and goes mushy. I can't have anything toasted because of choking plus it gives me blood blisters in my mouth which has been worse since on blood thinners. Biscuits have to be dunked as they can give me them as well.
Does your husband have sleep ( can't think how to spell it ) where he stops breathing for a few seconds? As that can cause choking in your sleep and end up coughing.

Does your GP know of these problem if not you must tell him. My husband never asked questions or told GP or consultants the full facts so I had to ask and tell everything. Used to go mad at him but he said I knew you would ask and tell. Went when he was told he only had 5 years to live it was me who asked all the questions.

In his work he was spot on with everything and was a brilliant man at his job. Private life another matter. I organised everything including all the packing for holidays. Anything to do with me or the children he was full of questions and gave full disclosure. But he was what I called a man's man all the men in my life where and are cut from the same cloth your husband sounds the same.

I still read BD everyday and don't mean to just single one person out but just trying to help Doodle with her husband. No idea if what I said has helped .

I am full of administration with all you are going through and the support and friendship you give freely to eachother. You help me no end . X