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Black Dog 19

(1001 Posts)
Doodle Fri 13-Oct-23 22:36:41

For the support, understanding and sharing of mental health issues.
All are welcome. We treat each other with kindness.

Doodle Mon 27-Nov-23 19:12:06

Scaredycat have you heard news of your niece. I hope she’s ok. What a worrying time for you all.
HVDY goodness what dreadful news of your nephew. Must have come as a shock to all the family, I’m glad you’re going to visit your brother but like you wouldn’t know what to say in the face of such news.
Hope your SIL settles in well in her news home. Lovely you have a good bond with your DGC.
nadateturbe you did well in your diet, I must do something. I think my new meds may have caused some weight gain but I can’t carry on like this, I love having my hair washed at the hairdresser, you’re right,
Well now I know why I feel so ill, I have a chest infection and fluid on the lungs, Just started antibiotics today so hoping they will help relieve some of the symptoms.

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 19:50:51

HVDY I'm sorry to hear about your nephew, how terrible that it has progressed so quickly. So much for your brother to take in but also of course, for your nephew's family. Better news about your SIL -thank goodness she has somewhere permanent now and she can get the chance to settle in.
Scaredycat I hope your niece's procedure went well today. You must all be so worried. You will be supporting your sister and it's good you are close to talk to each other.
Nadateturbe I'm relieved you were told the MRI was 'ok' though it's only natural you will want to know exactly what those medical terms were about.
DoodleOh I'm sorry, you must feel so poorly with the chest infection and fluid on lungs. You really can't be too careful with chest infections and I'm glad to hear you have started antibiotics.Hoping you get some relief quite soon.

Bad night again .Worrying , pain and many trips to loo.
Good that I had quick reply from MH nurse and he's calling me tomorrow after speaking with Dr.

Hoping all BDs not mentioned and those reading have a peaceful night. So many are needing comfort right now .xx

nadateturbe Mon 27-Nov-23 20:44:41

Doodle I'm glad you didn't ignore the cough. I'm sure antibiotics will soon help. Goodness, one thing after another for you. Take care, keep resting x

nadateturbe Mon 27-Nov-23 20:48:55

Sweetpeasue sorry you had another bad night. I hope your day has been better. I assume you spoke to the MH nurse about ADs and he is speaking to your doctor.

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 21:00:49

Thankyou Nadateturbe . The Dr he's speaking to is either the trainee psychiatrist or the trained one, in the MH centre. Yes about ADs or earlier appt. My afternoon was more comfortable . Hope you're OK. x

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 21:25:17

Bowel is in right state ,sort of 'frozen'- can't describe it. Just taken 2 Laxidos as had two doses of both painkillers. Had 1o mins of the excruciating chest pain again this morning.Just don't know what's going on or how long it's all meant to go on for.
Pain Management Thursday and so scared for so many reasons. I just know they're going to say it's not fixable- any of it- because they won't know. Nobody does. I don't know how this can happen. I've never known anyone with pain that can't be diagnosed but ruins their life.
Sons's ex asked him to ask me to look after GS Fridays after school while he's away and then take drive him back to her house . I never know what I'm going to be like.
Sorry, just feel so frightened of how I'm feeling. So black.And so sorry.


Scaredycat Mon 27-Nov-23 21:45:40

HVDY- oh your poor nephew that’s terrible. That’s a lot of stress for your brother and ultimately you too.There isn’t much you can say - he just needs to talk I expect.
At least your SiL is going to be settled at last- I hope she,ll be happy( in her own way) there.
I have just heard from my sister that my nieces operation today has been cancelled !! She had to be there for 11 so don’t know what happened, they were having to go and fetch her home- it’s so stressful and she was very nervous.
Hope the chicken was nice.
Nadateturbe- I ,m like you I never have my hair washed at hairdressers as I have arthritis in the neck too.
I,m sorry about your sister I hope she is doing well. My sister is in remission at the moment after a terrible time.
Doodle- I haven’t heard any more about my neice since my sister let me know the op was cancelled. I,m a bit worried but she will let me know when she is ready.
No wonder you feel ill - hope the antibiotics start working quickly. You have got so weak and vulnerable after these last weeks.Keep warm and rest as much as possible.
SweetPeaSue- you must be getting so weary after another bad night. So glad the MH nurse will talk with you tomorrow.
Hope you are able to sleep better tonight.
Of course you feel frightened but try just one day at a time and hopefully the MH nurse may be able to help you with different ADs.
Wyllow- sending a hug
Very tired tonight so off to bed. Wishing all BD and just those reading a peaceful night.x

nadateturbe Mon 27-Nov-23 21:55:35

Sweetpeasue you should report your chest pain to the dr. There could be various causes. Did you tell the MH nurse?
I'm not a medical person, but I think your pains should be able to be treated better.
I wonder if you contacted your MP could he offer advice on how to get better help. It may be something you have already tried, or you're not interested in doing, but it's something I would have considered.
I too find it impossible to commit. I tell people. I'm sure they don't understand or even sometimes believe me. But that's just how it is. I think you should just be honest with your son. Of course it's lovely to see your GS or help out, but they need to know your condition is unpredictable.
I hope your bowel problem sorts itself. I'm not sure what you mean. Drink plenty of warm water.

nadateturbe Mon 27-Nov-23 22:00:56

Oh Scaredycat poor girl. That's the second cancelled op I've read today on GN. It's so stressful.
It's great that your sister is in remission. My sister still doesn't know if the treatment has worked or not but she feels OK.
Hope you get to sleep soon.x

Doodle Mon 27-Nov-23 22:05:45

Sweetpeasue like nadsteturbe I too think you should see your someone about the chest pain .
Hope you’re feeling more comfortable tonight.
Must be hard to not be able to know from one day to the next what you can commit to. Hope the MH team come up with an appointment for you earlier than they had.
Scaredycat your poor sister and her DD. I wonder why the appointment was cancelled. Might be staff shortages. Best not to speculate but wait and see.
Sorry can’t write more tonight. Feeling very groggy. Didn’t sleep last night and I’m so tired now. Sleep well all xx

nadateturbe Mon 27-Nov-23 22:10:01

Got some shopping done after hairdressers, think husband was glad when I said time to go home. It was only 1.30.😁. Honestly men!
In bed at 8pm watching Corrie.

Hello Wyllow3 Whiff EllieAnne- hope you are safely home, and remembering to contact GP.
and anyone else on BD.
Hoping for a peaceful night for all. xx

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 22:12:44

Scaredycat That's so dreadful for your niece's op to be cancelled.She will have had herself all prepared for it poor girl. Hope you sleep OK you will be concerned for your sister and neice.
Nadateturbe I had this chest pain before and the hospital said they believe it's some sort of oesophigal spasm. It lasted 10 mins but they don't believe it's heart related so not to worry.
I think my bowel pain could be because of adhesions, or damage to some pelvic nerves but have had colonography over a Yr ago and nothing amiss inside they could see. It just feels like worst constipation even when it's definitely not. Or I can't go even when I feel need to. Once again thinkmight be nerve related . No one knows.Lots of scans done.
Sorry to be on a downer . MH nurse doesn't really do much talking. Seems a sort of 'go-between.
If I can start ADs again might help.
Take care of yourself.x

Doodle Mon 27-Nov-23 22:13:56

Night night Wyllow x

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 22:22:13

Thanks Doodle You get some much needed rest.x

I can occasionally take GS for a couple of hrs from son , when I can easily return him home anytime to him.
It's just that ex would be at work and she also wants us to drive him back to her home where her partner is. DH not happy and I just can't be doing with the worry on top of everything else.
I used to be well enough to do all this.It all makes me resentful and despairing about what's happened to me.
I'll be OK. I just can't envisage me being 'normal' or well mentally again.

Sweetpeasue Mon 27-Nov-23 22:23:27

Yes dear* Wyllow*. Night night. xx

HowVeryDareYou2 Mon 27-Nov-23 22:49:04

Doodle A chest infection, on top of everything else you've had sad. I hope the antibiotics start working soon. I expect you're run down, and after everything you and your husband have had, it would be understandable.

SweetpeaSue I hope you can get started on some more suitable ADs soon, and I do hope your pain and discomfort ease off and allow you to sleep tonight. The pain management might offer some help or advice. I certainly hope so.

ScaredyCat I wonder why the op was cancelled? The poor thing, she must have got herself all psyched up and ready. I hope she won't have to wait long for another date. I'm glad your sister is in remission.

nadateturbe I hope your sister's treatment has worked. It's good that she feels ok in herself, though.

Wyllow Hope you're looking after yourself
EllieAnne Hope you're back ok.

Hope ALL BDers have a restful night x

Wyllow3 Tue 28-Nov-23 00:22:40

Night night BD's many fellow feelings expressed here xxx

Ellie Anne Tue 28-Nov-23 07:40:29

Yes am back but feeling bad about dd. She was supposed to be taking me to station for 1st train but once I was in the car she went the wrong way and said she was taking me for second train which involved a longish drive road closures and more stress. I got to second station too early whereas train one worked in fine. Eventually she agreed to drop me off nowhere to park. Then got a text from son 2 to say he’d meet me in Glasgow and get a coffee before next train. Much as I like to see him I knew she’d asked him to and has also told other son I was unwell. She didn’t tell dh thank goodness.
The thing is if I interfered with her life in any way she’d be furious. She tells me very little and hates being asked questions.
I have friends who feel their adult children treat them like children and I get it. Son 2 didn’t seem concerned and no word from son 1 so that’s fine.
Rant over. Got a busy day today. Helping at church group this morning and then food bank but will try to get dr app made.
Thanks for listening.

nadateturbe Tue 28-Nov-23 11:58:46

Good morning everyone.
Sweetpeasue I'm relieved to hear you know what causes the chest and bowel pain. Doesn't lessen the pain, but it helps to know the cause.
I hope you are OK this morning.
I understand not being able to do things, I'm dealing with a similar problem this morning, pretty unsolvable as people just don't understand. Driven to eating chocolate!
EllieAnne it's annoying to feel you are being treated like a child, but it's good to know DD cares. There may well be a time when you're glad of it. So nice of you to help at the food bank.

Sweetpeasue Tue 28-Nov-23 13:25:01

Nadateturbe Ikwym about you thinking people are maybe not believing you. I share that with you. If you have a limb in plaster it's on show.
Hope you're feeling alright today apart from whatever the problem is that has you eying the chocolate! Another bad night but I'm OK now and the sun is shining.
EllieAnne I'm sure your DD wanted to help with your travelling even if it didn't turn out that way. Glad you got to see son 2 for a coffee. It's very rare that I get to see my sons alone . It might be good that your family knows about the garden incident

Sweetpeasue Tue 28-Nov-23 13:31:19

sorry posted too early.
EllieAnne ....about the garden incident as you do so much for them -no one's invincible. It's kind of you to help at food bank. Do get a Dr's appt to make sure everything is OK.

Thinking of Doodle and hoping the antibiotics are working. Also hope everyone's day isn't too bad.

Doodle Tue 28-Nov-23 14:20:22

Ellie Anne another problem train journey fo you. You often say your children don’t care about you but when they do you feel as though they are treating you as a child.

DH and I have just been very happy to have both our sons taking care of us. I didn’t look at it as them bring interfering but caring. I agree the two can overlap.
The young have always hated their parents getting to involved in their lives. I think that’s part of their independence and it starts when they’re teenagers. But the children looking out for their parents is a different thing. I remember the first time my son took my arm to guide me across the road and thought of the change from when I used to take his hand to keep him safe.
Parents and their children are often a difficult relationship but perhaps this time your DD was just trying to be caring.
Thank goodness you hot home safely. Hope you have a good day.
nadateturbe sorry your struggling today. You’re right people who don’t experience this don’t understand. It’s hard.
sweetpeasue you’re spot on. If you have a visible ailment every body knows you’ve got a problem. Like with Blue Badge holders ( and I am guilty of this too). See someone using a blue badge in a car park and then get out of the car and walk away…..nothing much wrong with them you think. How little we know and how quick to judge.
HVDY. No not surprised to be ill as you say. I am feeling a little better today. Are you having a baby visit this week?

HowVeryDareYou2 Tue 28-Nov-23 14:42:06

EllieAnne Your daughter obviously cares for you, even though you might not like her way of showing it. It's better than your AC not bothering with you, which some familes have. You do some good and worthwhile charity work, which is very nice.

SweetpeaSue Glad you're having a better day. It's a lovely bright, sunny day here, too.

Doodle I'm glad you're feeling a bit better. Baby will be here all day tomorrow smile/

Brother didn't want me to go and see him today, as he said his stomach is off. He knows where I am (but won't come here, so I'll go to his house on Friday. My friend picked me up and we went to a lovely farm cafe place near Newark. Lovely, but very over-priced. I'm going with DH to the doctor's later, about his depression. Hope ALL BDers have been having a decent day x

Ellie Anne Tue 28-Nov-23 15:04:19

Yes I realise I sound ungrateful.
I’m so used to coping on my own. Went to dr had to explain to receptionist why I needed app and have got one for week on Thursday. When I came out I discovered it was with nurse not dr.

HowVeryDareYou2 Tue 28-Nov-23 17:33:26

EllieAnne I met my friend today, she's got a son who never sends a birthday/Christmas/Mother's Day card, no present, etc. No falling out, he's just self-centred. His baby is 13 months old, my friend hasn't seen the child since Feb, and has only got 3 photos. (Son lives 2hrs away, doesn't visit). Friend's daughter often doesn't speak/reply for weeks, months at a time. About your appointment - perhaps the nurse will be able to deal with your problem (if not, presumably they'd be able to ask a GP on duty for advice)

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