Black Dog 22

Doodle I hope the Cruise counselling will help you. It must be very difficult indeed to adjust to a different way of life without the man you shared so many years with. I thought of you again (as I do every day, actually) today, when we had a boat trip and passed some beautiful riverside flats.

Wyllo3 Glad you heard from your sister. Is it quite a while since you saw each other? MH issues aren't always easy to understand by someone who hasn't had/got MH problems. She cares, though.

SweetpeaSue Glad you got your husband's meds ok. Sorry you have had such a lot of pain. How are you now?

EllieAnne I wish I was a normal size and about 20 years younger. What's the weather like where you are now?

nadateturbe, ScaredyCat and ALL others - hope you're ok today.

It was great in York - the hotel was posh and very nice indeed. Excellent 3-course meal, an entertaining murder mystery event (comedy send-up of The Traitor tv programme). A relaxing river cruise this morning, spent all day going in and out of cafes and shops, then a chocolate-making experience (designed and made our own bar each) and got home at 7.30. Not a mobility scooter in sight! The pain has been very on and off - I've found that low seating/low toilets brought the pain on severely, but overall, things were fine. Love to all x

So glad it all went well HVDY. Boat trip sounds nice. Busy day!
Wouldn't we all like to be slim and younger!
But have to count our blessings.
Goodnight everyone xx

It all sounds lovely Hvdy. You coped very well.
Nadateturbe I don’t buy much from qvc but like to watch sometimes.
It’s been ok here today. No rain but still not very warm.
It would be good if we lived closer and could meet. But I think we are well spread out.
Sleep well everyone.

Dressing gown day.

Followed everyones days and sending love and warmest thoughts xxx to all BD's. Catch up tomorrow x

I don't either Ellieanne. We lead such interesting lives . I hope you get to church.
Good morning Doodle , sending love. wondering will you go to church.
Thinking of you Wyllow3.
Hope DH is ok Sweetpeasue.
The sun is shining, and both feel ok, so we are going to the caravan. Its very neglected this year. Won't make it to church unfortunately. Sitting for over an hour on a hard pew and then driving to caravan wouldn't work. Don't want to ask DH to wait until tomorrow.

Hope everyone on BD has a nice or at least reasonable day. xx

nadateturbe Hope you have a lovely time away in your caravan. It's raining here .

EllieAnne I'm not doing so well today, but I haven't got to go anywhere, so that's ok. It's not warm here, either - and it's raining. Will you go to church today?

Wyllow3 Hope you have a better day today. I didn't get dressed until 11.30 (couldn't be bothered).

Hope everyone's day is going well so far x

Hi I haven't written on this thread before but have on the estrangement thread. Looking for support to stop me feeling low and in a dark place.
I have been in hospital with a neurological condition which has caused me to have weakness in my right side. I am seeing a neurosurgeon at St George's early august when brain surgery will be discussed and risks evaluated. Stressful times.
I have 2_daughters. My eldest who has 2 young children has had anxiety issues for the last 2 years. Her husband left her when the kids were toddlers. I have supported her in every way I can but due to ill health have had to pull back this year. I have had to stop driving as have reduced sensation and movement in right leg. I have tried to see her by train and ubers but never felt welcome. She has not contacted me over past 3 weeks in spite of being in hospital which she has been aware of.
My other daughter lives 200 miles away and unfortunately on the day I was admitted to hospital she was knocked off her bike. We speak regularly on the phone but been unable to see each other.
I feel so alone and vulnerable. All I think about is memories of the family I once had but now seem to have lost. Don't know how I can get this.

Welcome Jaffa cake. You will be made welcome here. I’m sorry things are so difficult for you. I also have a daughter who is far away and I never know if she wants me to visit or not.
But you can only do what your health allows.

Welcome Jaffacake. Sorry to hear how things are.x Will talk soon.

Hi all.
EllieAnne- I hope you found some friendship at Church today.
I too would like to be young again but I feel grateful to still be here as many have not made it to old age.
Yes wouldn’t it be lovely if we could all meet up- maybe we could make it happen one day.
Wyllow- It’s good your Sis and you are in contact. She loves and cares for you but as others have said many people can’t deal with others MH problems and I think pretend it isn’t happening.
Hope today was a better one for you.
SweetPeaSue- I think your little blackbird is there for you like a feathery guardian angel. I remember he used to visit before. Hope you,ve both relaxed a bit today and managed to get out somewhere.
Nadateturbe- have a lovely time at the caravan. We have to make the most of these good days and enjoy the sunshine- it will do you good. Thank you yes we’re enjoying the beautiful scenery here.
Doodle- l too think of you every day and wish I had some words to help heal your pain. But there are none. Just know you are loved by us all and we are all here for you.
HVDY- so glad you enjoyed your time in York. What a fun time it sounded- cafes,shops and chocolate - perfect.
We love a boat trip - we went on one yesterday too!!!
So pleased your pain didn’t spoil it. Sorry it’s worse today- have a rest and look after yourself.
Jaffacake2- Welcome- I hope we can help you feel less alone. What a lot you have to contend with right now. So sad for you and it must have been the last straw to hear your other daughter had been in an accident. I do hope she wasn’t badly hurt. You can share your feelings here.

Love to all from the beautiful Lakes

Scaredycat we're hoping to go there in a few weeks. We've stayed a couple of times and did a boat trip on Lake Ullswater. Beautiful scenery. Glad you're enjoying it.
My (very amateur) painting of our view from cottage.

Wow, thats amazing. I grew up near there...long story.
Welcome Jaffa and sorry to hear things are so challenging.

nadateturbe glad you’re feeling better enough to travel today. Have a lovely time at your caravan.
HVDY hope you had good weather for your boat trip. We’ve had thunderstorms and hail here. Your trip sounds lovely so glad the pain hasn’t been bad enough to spoil it for you. Fancy making your own chocolate bar,
Ellie Anne did you make it to church? I did. Lovely service and had coffee and a chat after. Glad I went.
Wyllow it’s been quite cold here today. Hope you can get out for a bit again soon.
Scaredycat what a lovely thing to say. Yes I’m lucky to have such support from all of you. Our little group do care and support don’t we.
Hope you’re having a good time and the weather is good. The lakes are beautiful.
Sweetpeasue have you seen your little blackbirds today. Loved the thought of one following you indoors.
Dear Jaffacakewelcome. That feeling of being alone and vulnerable is awful. So sorry about your daughter’s accident I hope she’s ok.
I’m sure your other daughter cares but is perhaps very involved in looking after her children on her own. Sounds as though you have been there for her and a good support.
I too have to have an operation soon and am not looking forward to it.
Do they think the operation will help restore feeling to your right side? Of course it’s stressful and if you haven’t got the support you need it’s no wonder you’re feeling low. All the worry and anxiety will be bringing you down. I hope when you get to see the neurosurgeon he/she can talk things through with you and help you understand better what’s going on.
Please come and post in here whenever you like. We are an understanding bunch.

Zakouma what a lovely place to grow up. Did you live there long?
Love the painting nadateturbe

Big old story, Doodle. We moved to Cumbria when I was 10. I can't face going back after some horrible family stuff. Its such a loss. I may go before the summer ends. Lets see.

Scaredycat The Lakes is beautiful isn't it-stunning. We always wonder as we near Blencathra driving along A66 how magnificent it all is.
Doodle You are very much in all our thoughts every day. You are so much cared about here. I wish so much I could take the heartbreak away from you. Sending another hug and love.
HVDY So pleased you had such a great time despite your intermittent pain. You managed to get quite a lot into your weekend and I loved the idea of making your own chocolate bar. You seem to have a better idea, after that break, about what can set off the pain or at least aggravate it when it's there. Hope you've had a restful day.
EllieAnne Hope your day hasn't been too bad. Quite cold here today and rainy afternoon. It would be lovely for us all to meet up ,it's a shame we are all so spread out.
Nadateturbe So glad you have been able to get away to your caravan. After having to stay at home so much it will do you good. Hope weather there is kind.
Jaffacake2 Welcome. What an awful lot you are having to deal with and the worries about your daughters. I hope the youngest isn't too badly injured. It's just dreadful that you are not getting any support from your other daughter after being there for her needs. I'm so very sorry- that must hurt terribly. I know AC can be hurtful at times. You must feel very vulnerable indeed and it's so understandable when you are facing an operation that you need the care and to feel the security of being loved.
I'm glad you can still talk to your youngest DD and that's so important to share your feelings with her too. There are times, we as parents, need the reassurance and some care from AC when we have given it to them over the years. Nurturing them as we do , I think it's sometimes forgotten about in their busy lives.
Please feel free to to come here. We all have or have had different problems and worries . Take care and look after yourself.
Wyllow Sorry about your dressing gown day. I didn't sort myself till late and tbh didn't want to get out of bed this morning. Just want to close my head from worries though it doesn't work and brain keeps thinking. Do you have to wait v long for your next outing with carer? Sorry if you've said. Hoping you feel a little better tomorrow. Oh is your tum any better now? x

Still worries aboutDH occupying my thoughts. He had striking temple throbbing today and thick foggy head so perhaps needs higher dose. Has neck and arm pain with tingling in hand and still vast difference in BP . We're both tired as it takes up thoughts but managed to get out for coffee this morning and DH has ordered a replacement shed.

CandyAllsorts**Whiff Sorry if left anyone out. Hope you're all OK and wishing all a peaceful night.

Nadateturbe wow.Such a beautiful painting.
Zakouma66 What a gorgeous place to live. Can understand a reluctance to go back if it stirs up bad memories. Hope you can revisit at a time when you might find you can deal with them.

Jaffacake, I'm sorry you're so ill. No wonder you're feeling low and alone. You must be so nervous and anxious about the operation you face, and no support from your daughters. Do they know how ill you are? Your first daughter I'm sure loves you but is maybe having problems coping at the minute. Your second daughter sounds caring and I'm sure will come when she is able. Is she ok after the accident?. I know how it feels not to have your children close. I rarely see mine and miss the closeness we once shared. But we still love each other and do the best we can to keep in touch. But it must be awful facing your health problems alone. I hope the neurosurgeon can make you feel less anxious about the op. when you speak to him.
And people here will always be ready to listen. xx

Doodle I am so glad you made it to church and enjoyed coffee and chat after. That is so good. . I didn't but I listened to my online service.
It's nice being here in the van. . Weather's not great, of course, but still relaxing. Glad you like my painting.

Sorry Jaffacake I've got your daughters the wrong way round.

Sweetpeasue thoughtful post to Jaffacake.
I'm sorry you've had a bad day. I can understand you not wanting to get out of bed. All the pain and worry about DH too. Giving you a big hug. Your DH is definitely a koko person. How he keeps going with all the pain is beyond me. It's great you managed to get out for a while.
Zakouma66 it's terrible when a place is spoiled by bad memories. It's hard to get past it. Maybe some day, when the time is right.
Wyllow3 how are you? Did you manage to dress today? Sending love.
Doodle sending love and hugs.x
Hope you get some sleep tonight.
Whiff Candy Allsorts and anyone else reading, Hope you all have a peaceful night.xx

It’s a lovely painting, nadateturbe and glad you are going to the caravan.

You need an easy going day after yesterday, HVDY

Hello jaffacake Its a sad sorry about your eldest, and I hope it can be repaired so you feel a bit more in touch.

Waving to you Scardeycat in the lakes, wishing you some sunshine.

Warm thoughts heading your way Doodle, have you had any thoughts about when for the operation.

Hello jaffacake Its a sad sorry about your eldest, and I hope it can be repaired so you feel a bit more in touch.

I wouldn’t get any visitors in hospital but thats partly as I dont reach out.

*Well done for getting out, Sweetpeasuedespite all

Warm waves for EllieAnne and Zakouma

I dressed and showered today thats all. Looking at the garden is awful, nothing done for a year. Whats the point etc as things fall behind more and more. Nothing to look forward to day after day wearing.

Information - I’m still waiting to see if we can find a supportive carer, MH people are managing once a week atm.

JaffaCake Welome. You're going through a tough time. Your daughter hasn't contacted you, but perhaps she's busy with her children? How's your other daughter now, after coming off her bike? Facing such serious surgery is daunting. Have you got siblings and/or friends to lean on at all?

ScaredyCat Hope you're enjoying your time at the lakes. Is the weather good?

nadateturbe Hope you have a lovely time at your caravan. I love your painting.

Doodle How are you? Glad you got to church and had some company yesterday. Have you got a date for your op?

SweetpeaSue Has your husband got to tell the GP or hospital about his BP readings? He just plods on, despite everything, doesn't he? Poor man. How are you today?

Wyllow3 You sound very low. I wish we all lived closer to each other, I'd be there like a shot to offer my help. We all care and want you to get better.

DH had a hospital appointment this morning, for the cough that he had for almost 2 years! He's been told to lose 1 stone and he'll be seen again in 3months, after he's had tests for sleep apnoea (he's got to wait for an appointment for those). I'm hobbling about today - the pain is like Sciatica but at the front of my groin. What a pair we are.....

zakouma66, Whiff, Allsorts and others - hope you're all ok. Love to all x

HVDY ouch, that pain sounds bad! Surely something can be done. A long waiting game for your DH, and now another wait, while he tries to lose a stone in 3 months. That's roughly a pound each week. Good luck! I hope he manages.
We've had a lovely day, bought some plants for the planters outside the van. Then had lunch in a little hotel in the Mournes. There were only 2 couples and a lady in the bar area. We were all chatting to each other. Had cheese and ham toasties with side salad. Said no to dessert (with difficulty!). It's a beautiful day.
Wyllow3 wonderful. You showered and dressed yesterday. How are you today?
How is everyone today. Sending love and hugs xx

nadateturbe The painkillers don't work (CoCodamol, Codeine Phosphate, Gabapentin), and I don't feel there's any point in contacting anyone again - I haven't got much faith in "them". My husband will lose that weight (probably more), easily, I think. Easier than I can - I comfort eat, so love all sweet stuff. You've had an enjoyable day, by the sound of things. The weather's good, too. I had a Temu order, some floral bunting for the garden, and a couple of decorative things for the side of the house. DH put them all up.

How has everyone been? x