Black Dog 22

Doodle Hope going to church brought some peace for you, if only for a short time. Lighting a candle is always a lovely thing to do and I do hope you felt some calm. Thankyou for telling me about your DH and the clogged artery. My DH got his appt for the CT Thoracic Aorta and has it on Sunday so now has them all. Sending much love .Wish I could give you a hug in person.
HVDY I feel so sorry for you -the pain is stopping you doing everything and must be so frustrating and really getting you down. The aqua-aerobics was so good for you and a reason to get out and meet your friends. Will you be able to just 'be' in the water without doing the exercises. On the other hand it must be quite difficult getting changed too when it hurts to bend. I agree it's obviously not arthritis causing the pain at all. Honestly how silly. Wish I could suggest something. You can only ,really try and avoid the movements that cause pain as much as you possibly can, which is what you're already doing. Pregabalin also treats nerve pain, I think, but it's not something I'd want to get used to taking either. Big hug HVDY.
Nadateturbe I didn't realise you had been in a holiday cottage. I've often thought when we've rented a cottage how wonderful to be able to own one amongst such gorgeous scenery. It's the quiet too that is lovely . I hope you're feeling more rested now. Such a shame you had to come away. Weather is bums though isn't it.
Scaredycat Hope you're enjoying your holiday despite the rain. It's just such a rotten summer so far and we've had so much rain here too. The Lakes are known for it but hope you've been able to see some beauty in between showers. It's such a moody place weatherwise.
Wyllow So pleased you manage to get out to Sainsbury's and I hope you can keep that going- well done for koko. Wish I could help and lighten your poor soul. You're in such a gloomy place and I don't know what to say of help. Just hope you get another carer soon. (Glimmer of hope with election result for NHS perhaps).
EllieAnne I often have to make first contact with AC and I think I'm often looking for the 'signs' that show they care, even though I deep down know they do ,iykwim. I think they just busy with their own lives and their lives are often so much fuller than ours with work and children. Hope you're OK. The wet weather is miserable isn't it.
Candy*Whiff**Zakouma66**Jaffacake2 * Hope you're all OK and have a better day tomorrow if today's been unkind.

Not been to book group for a few weeks as didn't want to leave DH but with son back thought it OK today. He still has extreme tiredness and almost continous tingling in one hand with high BP but his headaches are definitely better. Not the severe pain though still a thick,dull feeling.
I'm doing OK painwise , just on mornings, and so glad as can look after DH better. Had DGS from school yesterday and he had tea here. He's so funny and such a good little soul when he's here. Loves drawing pictures for his grandad and quizzed us with a full book of Horrid Henry jokes!

Hope all have a peaceful night and sending love.

nadateturbe Is it M.E. you've got? It does seem to be a strange illness, as you say. Can anything be done? Physiotherapist no.1 gave me some exercises, which made things worse - they were for hip arthritis. 2nd Physio man gave me completely different ones to do, which help a little bit when I'm doing them, but only for that time. I'm sick of it.

Son2 and his little family came for dinner and have just gone. Chubby Chops enjoyed it. DH did a roast beef dinner, then we had cheesecake and cream. Hope ALL BDers are ok x

Hi all.
No way are you a rubbish Mother. Your children have busy lives I,m sure - remember how it used to be when we were young. If they are slow to reply or sometimes don’t ring it’s because they have full days not because they don’t care.Glad you had some chats after Church- that’s what you need , company and time with the people you like.
JaffaCake2- Glad you had a better night. It’s hard to block off isn’t it but sometimes it’s the only way. Your poor daughter what a terrible accident - thank God though they found the tumour. Hope it is benign like the other one. My niece has one that is 21cm and is waiting for her Op.
Glad too you will soon have your friend for company. It will be good to have her with you when you see the NeuroSurgeon. 2 pairs of ears are better than one . Have a good time together - you need the relaxation and to look after yourself.
Doodle- Hope you enjoyed lunch with your friend.
We were both lighting candles today! We went to Cartmel Priory and lit one for our lost loved ones . Such an old church and it makes you think of all the people who have done the same thing through the centuries.
Very rainy today but we enjoyed the day even so.
As always sending love and a hugx
SweetPeaSue- Glad DH has some dates at last. Losing a long post is just sooo annoying isn’t it.
Hope you,ve been able to get out today.x
Nadateturbe- Ah what a shame your lovely day was followed by a not so good one. Bet you felt relieved to be back home.
Next time the sun will shine for you.
Yes it’s been rain jackets all day today - poor people on walking holidays like little drowned rats. But I,m just glad to be able to be here despite the 24/7 AF. I get very tired but it’s never going to be any better so just have to deal with it as best as I can. You deal with much more and are an inspiration. As so many here are.
HVDY- you can’t be expected to carry on with such severe pain.
You need to be able to drive and physio just doesn’t seem right until you have a definite diagnosis. I think I said before my Sister takes morphine for her pain but at a much reduced dose from when she first took it. She has no problems with it.
Hope the family are all ok - how is your SiL? My other best friend texted me to say she has early onset dementia- it’s no surprise but I,m sad for her. Getting old is not for Cissies is it.
Wyllow- you do so well driving to the shops. Could you maybe try to vary your food a little in case you might be low in certain
Nutrients.
Any news of the new carer? KOKO Wyllow- you will get there.
Zakouma- how are you today?

Friday we drive across to NE coast so will post when settled in. Now going to watch England- another hour and half of torture😩
Love to all those mentioned and those not. Take care of yourselves .

nadateturbe so sorry you weren’t feeling well at the caravan. Sensible not to drive. Will you have to go back another day to collect your car?
Glad you’re safely home. You don’t have MS do you? The ME is debilitating enough. May I ask how long it’s been now?
DH suffered for years.
Wyllow do you ever buy something as a treat? Something nice you’d like to eat? I do. Gives me something to look forward to.
HVDY what a shame your aqua exercises brought on such pain. I was hoping the water would help you.
No my friend is elderly and likes to eat in a proper restaurant rather than pub. I’m going for lunch tomorrow with someone else and that will be a cafe. Might have a panini
Did knit and natter today which was good.
Your dinner sounds nice. I do think you need maybe a third opinion. You can’t carry on like this unless they come up with a positive plan to make you better.
Ellie Anne do you have any knit and natter groups? The library sometimes do them.
Sweetpeasue yes church was lovely today. So peaceful and a nice chat with others after. I may well go in Sunday too.
Good your DH has all his appointments now. Hope you can get some proper answers soon.
Hope you both have a peaceful night.
Scaredycat hope you are enjoying yourselves. Have you been on the lakes?

Ooh Scaredycat you crept in when I wasn’t looking.
So sorry the weathers not been too good but sounds like you had a good day anyway. Enjoy the rest of your break

Lovely weather for ducks!!

Took it this morning . Love to all

Sweetpeasue the photo was a cottage we rented in the Lake district, I posted the photo when Scaredycat posted about her holiday. We have just come back from our caravan in Newcastle.
I'm glad your DH has his other appointment. Fingers crossed they work out what is wrong and do something for him asap.
I'm sure it was good to get to the book group and have a chat with the ladies. I think you're coping really well. It's great the pain isn't there just as much and allows you to care for your DH. And how lovely to have your little GS there. I'm sure it cheered you both up.

Sorry EllieAnne I left out your name at the beginning of my post. Senior moment!!

HVDY Just to explain, I was diagnosed as having M.E. also known as Chronic Fatigue System about 2010. But a neurologist recently said he thinks its perhaps MS, as I had lesions on my brain which can indicate this. It can be confirmed by a lumbar puncture. I decided not to have one as the neurologist said at my age all the medication would weaken my immune system, (which is quite good}. so I will try to cope although the fatigue/brain fog has got abit worse, and my eyes get tired quickly on the screens. My DH is brilliant at looking after things and I have mostly adjusted to less social life. And we have so many wonderful holidays and experiences to look back on. Many people aren't so lucky.
I think maybe your exercises might take some time to help. That's the worst about physio, it's hard to be patient. Is there any chance acupuncture might help? I had it years ago and it worked for me. It's not painful. . Lovely to have family for dinner. Your DH is such a good cook. I hope he only had a tiny portion of cheesecake

Doodle
I explained about my M.E. or MS on my post to HVDY.
Did your DH have M.E.?
I noticed you are probably having your op in three weeks. I wonder could you maybe ask not to be in a room on your own. I think it would be very depressing being alone.
That was a very nice time at church, I'm sure it helped you to feel more at peace. And then knit and natter. I know it's hard to look forward to each day alone and be motivated, but you are doing so well.
I hope you feel more peaceful tonight and manage to sleep. sending love and hugs.

nadateturbe DH also had ME and he had an MRI scan which showed lesions on the brain (this was over 20 years ago). He was told a lumbar puncture would confirm if it was ME but the neurologist said that a lumbar puncture would confirm if a virus was still active but that even if it was confirmed it wouldn’t make any difference to treatment and could in fact stir things up and make it worse, DH didn’t have one either.
Yes I will ask if I could be in a ward with others if they can arrange it.

Scaredycat Just as I thought, your photo says it all. .
I'm sorry to hear about another best friend having early onset dementia. It's very sad. glad your coping with the AF. So admire you. No, getting old is certainly not fun. Hope you have a good time in your next destination.

Doodle thank you. I think I made the right decision. The neurologist left the choice up to me. Thank you so much for sharing that. xx

Goodnight to everyone on BD.
Love to everyone, wave to Zakouma66 Whiff Candy Allsorts and anyone else reading.
Hoping you all have a peaceful night.xx

ScaredyCat Nobody seems interested in getting a proper diagnosis for what I've got. An MRI would show ligaments, tendons and nerves, but there's a waiting list of 6-8 months, and Physio2 said he thinks my problem will re resolved by then. I hope I'll get the Musculoskeletal appointment soon, so that someone can help me. It looks a bit grey where you are. The birds seem to be loving it. What a shame about your friend. My SIL is ok, thanks, in her own little world. I'll see her in a couple of weeks. My brother is finally going to visit his son in Norwich - he hasn't seen him for 6 years! Enjoy the rest of your holiday.

Doodle Glad you're getting out and seeing friends. It's always good to eat out - cafes, pubs, restaurants, it all saves having to cook or prepare anything to eat.

nadateturbe The pain has been too bad to do the exercises most of the time. I might look into accupuncture.
It can't hurt to try, can it? Ah, I see. Sorry if you'd said before. I think you're wise not to take any medications unless absolutely necessary. My husband is a great cook, and the dinner was lovely. The cheesecake was white chocolate and raspberry, from Aldi (I think).

DH has watched the football, on and off, so I've been listening to music with headphones on and ordered a few things from Amazon and Temu. Hope ALL BDers have a restful night x

HVDY That is a very long wait. I think I would be complaining to my MP. If you were working you would be unable to do your job right now. And problems can become worse in that time. Its just not good enough.
I wish we had an Aldi here. Seems like a good store. We don't have Morrisons or Waitrose either.
I've been jigsawing while DH watches shouts at the telly.
I can see a browse through Temu coming soon..
Goodnight again...x

I've followed your days but today feel too low and out of it to say more

Night night all xxx

Wyllow3 sending love.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HVDY How have you been today? Acupuncture is worth a try as it does seem to help some people. My DH had it on his back yrs ago .It didn't help him but there again he went on to have an operation on a slipped disc- as it was called then. I was thinking if you could possible have an MRI privately but of course it would mean seeing a private consultant to explain what it meant and what treatment necessary, if any. It must be terrible just waiting for it to go. Hope you get musculoskeletal appt soon.
Scaredycat That photo was beautiful. Just shows there can be beauty in all weather's- though can't see much here today. Been cutting off soggy mushy petunia buds -all slimy, yuck. DH laughed as I put on some gloves as I couldn't bear them- felt horrid -like slugs-not thet I've held those either. Hope weather improves for you on the east coast.
Nadateturbe How have you been today? I didn't realise ME could be much like MS. I wouldn't want unnecessary procedures either. Thankyou for the song on the YouTube link. The words are comforting. I sometimes say in my head Dear Lord and Father of Mankind ' when I'm in bed and have worries as I like the verse Drop thy still dews of quietness till all our striving cease. Sometimes I don't 'feel' anything but other times I do.
Wyllow I really feel for you with what seems a never ending depression . I wonder if a change in medication might help as whatever you are on doesn't see m to be helping very much. Will your carer be coming soon to go out with you? Koko is good but you need more help. I hope you have numbers to ring if you need to speak to someone- if so I hope you feel able to reach out.Sending you a hug .x
EllieAnne Are you OK? I saw there was a post deleted. Weather no better here and I'm sure you must find it harder to get out if it's bad where you are.
Dookle How have you been today? It can feel quite isolated in a room on your own in hospital but it perhaps depends on how long you will be expected to be there. I get nervous around strangers - I've been in hospital ward with others and not liked it at times but depends on who is there and what for. The knit and natter group sounds very relaxed and the company will help. Hug for you too and love.

All BDs - hoping you're OK and koko.

Went out with DH today and he came back with trainers and I bought some new pillows. Made some bread this afternoon. We watched the match last night. So tense and unnerving. I rang sons at the end and they were over the moon. Feel exhausted and tired but just heavy hearted over DH.
Love to all and a peaceful night.

Scaredycat lovely photo thank you. Hope you’re having a good time and your journey NE tomorrow is uneventful.
HvDY I can’t believe it takes that long for an MRI. Have you tried chasing your musculoskeletal appointment. Don’t forget when I phoned about my op they hadn’t even got the referral letter. It might be a good idea to follow it up.
Wow I can’t believe your brother hasn’t seen his son in that long. Good your SIL is content where she is.
nadateturbe I am doing a jigsaw at the moment. I’m hopeless. Keep staring at the pieces but nothing seems to fit,
What is Temu?
Ellie Anne hope you’re ok. Sending a hug.
Sweetpeasue I’m ok. Been out for lunch today and had afternoon tea. I think I’ll be in hospital a week. I just don’t like the idea of being alone in a room with my thoughts and no distraction for a week. We will see.
Wyllow hoping tomorrow is a better day for you

I deleted my post because I regretted what I said.
Sweet pea sue this is what I carry around with me all the time.

Doodle I understand your preference
for ward with others. Hadn't realised you'd be in a full week. Good you have the chance to be with others -lunch and afternoon tea. x
EllieAnne Oh there really are such beautiful and comforting words in that hymn. I'm glad they have meant so much to you too. I wasn't allowed, yrs ago, to be married to my DH in church, as had been divorced, so although register office wedding , had a blessing straight afterwards, in church.' Dear Lord and Father....' was one of the hymns I chose then. The lines Breathe through the earthquake, wind and fire...' are so powerful as it shows a need for God's voice to be heard in the worst of times. I hope you continue to find comfort in that hymn EllieAnne. I know from my own experience, it's not always possible but it's good yo know we have those words there. Night EllieAnne and hoping it's a peaceful one.

Nadateturbe No point in contacting my MP - there are lots of people all waiting for things, many for cancer treatments and things like that. How has your day been?

SweetpeaSue Thanks. I've enquired about getting a private MRI done, so I don't know the cost yet. You've been busy today. I hope your husband gets some help soon. You must feel worn out with all the worry.

Doodle I had an email to say that the MSK referral had been received, with a number to ring if I haven't heard anything within 2 weeks (that doesn't mean an appointment in 2 wk). I'm glad you've been out and had some company today. The weather has been miserable, but it's still good to go out.

Wyllow3 As SweetpeaSue says, is your medication correct? You have been low for a long time now. I hope things start picking up for you soon.

EllieAnne Whatever it was, I hope you're ok.

Day centre today (I'd missed 3 weeks). DH drove. Quiche and salad, then fruit crumble. It was ok, and the pain was manageable - until I got home and had to get up the 3 steps to the back door (steps at front are even worse). I think sitting and resting then doing a bit of movement might be the thing to do. Hope ALL BDers rest well tonight x