Black Dog 23

Hi all.
SweetPeaSue- so good to hear that you have more peace of mind re the past trauma of the cover ups. Well done you have come a very long way. It is natural now to stand up for what is right for your DH.
Glad your Sister is feeling better- she’s right it is a bit fluey but not as bad as real flu. The tiredness is horrible at the moment but trying to get on as normal with rests in between.
I feel so proud of you how you are digging in and coping with what at times must be really difficult physical pain. Big Well Done Hug - have a lovely time in the Lakes.
Doodle- It’s a lovely sunny day here today so hope you are enjoying the sun too. Had a walk this afternoon and it was quite warm - no sign of Autumn colour though.
I can’t remember if your boys live near you but do you see your GC during the week? We don’t see our local GGC that often as the eldest has started Grammar school and busy getting used to the travelling and a new exciting life and the younger one has lots of homework and interests. He has Crohns to deal with too.
Hope you have had a soothing day and you slept better last night.
EllieAnne- I would think the NHS hearing Aids are bette4 than when your husband got his. Mine are light and comfortable and even have blue tooth.
Private ones are so expensive I would be scared of losing them. I am very grateful for the NHS ones.
Whiff- what a lovely long post- full of help and humour.
Shiny eardrums- how impressive!!!
Enjoyed looking at the Group work - very different but all full of colour and life. The Fun part is just as important isn’t it.
HVDY- yes I quite enjoy subtitles but DH doesn’t. So the aids help me hear what people are saying properly.
I and my sister have had Tinnitus 24/7 ever since my Mum took her own life. She had it too- like it jumped from her to us.
Would Jaffa take the sedative with Dreamies - cats seem to go mad for them.
Glad Little Girl is improving- the nappies on the blisters must be so stingy and irritating. I think like you that a bit of fresh air would do her good now.
Wyllow- those destroying feelings of self hate / punishment have been planted in your mind to hurt you ,what you have had thrown at you is not the truth.
It’s like you feel you don’t deserve any happiness or enjoyment of life - So after a better day you feel you didn’t deserve it.
Well believe me you deserve what everybody deserves ,kindness, companionship,meet ups and chats . A bright ,intelligent lovely person like you deserves that and more.
I know that we all wish that so much for you.

I heard a saying this morning and thought it was relevant to us all.
“It might not be a good day but there is something good in each day”
Wishing you all something good - those mentioned and those not or those just reading.

Hello everyone, thank you for kind thoughts.
I have read some posts and scanned some. For some reason my eyes just can't cope with reading lots on screens very much.
Am so pleased for those who are managing a little better, or feeling a bit better physically and sympathise with problems some of you are experiencing. You are all so helpful and kind to each other.
I remember you all every day. I do care. Sending lots of love, good wishes and prayers.
I am a bit drained at the minute, spending a lot of time resting, and not seeing other people much, but I did make art on Wednesday. Not much energy for painting but so lovely to chat. Exhausted after, But worth it.
xx

Whiff Thoughtful words of encouragement to so many. You have made a fulfilling life for yourself and that must have been hard against all the odds , not least your rare condition. Yes, my pain isn't going anywhere but I'm very lucky that I'm not so debilitated as yourself. You are inspiring . Nice of you to mention Allsorts - Allsorts has so much understanding because of her own sufferings. Life can be very hard.
Beautiful and colourful paintings there Whiff. My DH hadn't heard of Gel painting. Incredible thing is how it can be so therapeutic and bring your class members closer over all your work. Thankyou so much for sharing with us.
HVDY How have you been today? Hope Littlegirl gets better each day and can soon get some fresh air. Good idea about the sheet to wrap Jaffa in though I'm guessing he's not going to like it. All for his own good of course.
Haven't got ALL blood tests back ,namely the one testing for Rheumatoid Arthritis though I strongly suspect Fibromyalgia .When it's bad my ribs hurt too and when taking deep breaths.Bloomin thing.
Scaredycat Thankyou so much for your kind words to me. I'm well aware though that everyone here on BD has done so much to keep me going and I owe a lot to all for that. I really was in a state when I first posted here. Little did I realise how much you would all come to mean so much to me. So thankyou Scaredycat for all your kindness and to all of you.
Nadateturbe You have such a lot to cope with. Must be so difficult to keep up your spirits when you are housebound so much and have pain and exhaustion. So glad to hear you got out today to your art class. I'm only beginning to realise how much interaction with others is so necessary. Take care of yourself and thankyou for your prayers.
Doodle How have you been today? Hoping you are managing to see someone every day- you are trying so hard.
EllieAnne Some great advice about NHS hearing aids . Do hope your DH will take steps to get some- I understand how you won't want to keep on at him to do it though. Hope you've had some sun where you are today.

Thankyou all for your appreciative comments about DH's pictures. I passed them on and he's pleased you've enjoyed seeing them. I've often thought he'd enjoy going to an art class though don't think he ever will.
Been doing a bit of packing and preparation for holiday tomorrow. It will be a week in the Lake District for those who asked. Weather forecast doesn't look good but the change will be v welcome. First thing DH will do after unpacking will be to check every corner of bedroom for spiders or I def wouldn't close my eyes!

Love to all mentioned or not and those who read.

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ScaredyCat How terrible that your mum took her own life. You've certainly had a lot of tragedy in your life, yet are so caring to others. Jaffa doesn't like Dreamies (nor did Mr Cooper), and he doesn't like tuna either. I will try to wrap him in a big towel and hope I can manage him that way.

SweetpeaSue I'm ok, thanks. Hopefully see LittleGirl next Tuesday, if not before. If you have got Fibromyalgia, the only treatment is painkillers. Son1 has it but manages well. Do you think you should see a GP about the rib pain when you breathe in? I hope you and your husband have a lovely week away. The weather should be decent, and the change of scenery will do you good.

nadateturbe Being out and seeing other people is important, so I'm glad you were able to do so recently. Rest up and get your energy levels back up.

How has everyone else been today? DH and I had afternoon tea at a post hotel - Thoresby Hall, one of the Warners places - a gift from Son2 and DIL for looking after LittleGirl so often. It was gorgeous. So much food, though, that we brought the selection of cakes home with us (as did a few other people). Hope ALL BDers have a relaxing evening x

Ellie Anne hope your husbands hearing is improved now and you don’t have to shout so much. Have you any plans this weekend? It’s harvest festival weekend for me.
Wyllow we will all be here with you . It would be lovely to have some of our old Wyllow back. Just keep doing the best you can.
Lovely post to Wyllow Sweetpeasue.
Your DH’s pictures are very good. Not sure he needs an art class he could probably run one. I’ve had a good day. Been to Bracknell shopping with my friend. Lovely and sunny but I found the Christmas decorations hard to cope with. Overall a good day though.
Hope you have a lovely week in the Lake District. You deserve a nice break from all you’ve been through. Such a lovely peaceful place will be sure to help.
Dear Whiff thank you for posting such thoughtful responses to us all. You’re so kind.
My church group mean a lot to me. They are so kind and many of them are widows l’or widowers so they know what it’s like. No one else has a clue really as I didn’t before I lost my lovely DH. It is an experience like no other. Nothing comes near it as you know. Yes the dark days are making it harder and Christmas approaching doesn’t help but perhaps this year I’ll concentrate more on the true meaning of Christmas rather than all the rest of it.
What a wonderful exhibition. How nice to be able to show what you’ve achieved. Enjoying what you do is so important. Glad you had a good time and a nice lunch too.
HVDY poor little girl. I hate seeing little ones suffer and she sounds such a happy child. Hope she gets better soon.
Yes I went out yesterday. Art class in the morning and hearing test in the afternoon. Had coffee with friend in between.
Your afternoon tea sounds lovely what a nice idea.
Scaredycat yes it’s been a lovely day here too. Had a nice day.
Yes our sons do live locally but I don’t see them that much although they phone and message. 2 of our grandchildren are away at university and the other at college so busy but I do get to see them now and then. I could always pop in if I want to they are not far away. Like yours they have busy lives and that’s ok I don’t expect them to be round all the time.
Nice to see them when I do.
Im so sorry about your mum. My goodness you have had so much to cope with in your life but you are always so kind and caring to others, what a lovely person you are.
I have tinnitus too all the time like you do. I don’t think about it all the time but it is always there. Loud and very high pitch.
Thank you for that lovely quote and your caring words to Wyllow so true.
nadateturbe lovely to hear from you. Sorry you’re so tired. I know it must be hard for you. Glad you made it to art. Important to be with others.

I’m really hoping the wrapping Jaffa in a sheet will work to get Jaffa off to the vets, HVDY. And what lovely afternoon tea treats and more to enjoy at home.That is so thoughtful and kind, I wish that too, Sweetpeasue, thank you.

Whiff but as ever - your comments are welcome and wise.
You do so well with your crafts and it was lovely to see all the pictures despite your trembling.

That was such a kind post at the start of the day, Sweetpeasue - thank you
I’m just so glad you are getting away - you seem better about going away than the last time when you were very wary - just hope you get the best weather you possibly can. May it be spider free. I hope you can be clear soon about what causes your pains.

Scardeycat you’ve had so much to cope with in your life - and survived and very caring….and yes HVDY is right, so thoughtful for us others in BD’s.

So glad you have the church group and connections, Doodle. I did wonder if the group had widows and widowers in it and the understanding that goes with it. I’m glad your sons aren’t too far away even tho you dont see them too much.

So glad when you come in nadateturbe - and just glad you manage it .

Thats 3 of us with tinnitus, “me too” but it’s not high pitched.

Made myself go out to the Botanical Gardens - admit it’s just that little bit better, not festering all day. But tum/bum is not happy - I was sick a bit twice walking round. Very tired now.

Writing in here is my last thing at night being in contact.

Sweetpeasue have you had a bone density scan ? My mom started having painful ribs when she was in her early 50's had a bone density scan and she had osteoporosis and got treatment for it . She was 90 when she died. I am waiting for an appointment for a bone density scan as my GP was concerned as I fall a lot and when I saw her she spotted the large bruise but my wrist from my fall into the corner of 2 walls in my bungalow. Luckily I have never broken a bone even though I have fallen my whole life . But some days have to wear wrist supports when my wrists are hurting .

nadadeturbe glad you posted . Do you think coloured lens might help your eyes ? I have a friend who has yellow tinted lens and they have eased her eyes and stop getting headaches. No idea if it would help you .

ScardeyCat after I had jaundice in 2017 woke one morning to a thumping noise turned out I can hear my heart beat in my left ear . It was very annoying especially as I can heart when I miss heart beats . But used to it and medication means I don't miss as many . But it does get louder if I have pushed myself to far exercising. But at least I know I am still alive 😁. My mom had tinnitus after an ear infection a buzzing noise . Sorry to hear about your mom . That must and still be hard for you and your sister to cope with. 💐.

Doodle only someone going through the same thing as you can understand how it feels . Glad you have a group who understands your grief as they are feeling it to. At least you can open up to eachother and say how you really feel . Even with your sons their grief is different to yours and if you are like me I have never let my children even with my son before the estrangement how I really feel. My husband loved Christmas he was a big kid . But I have only allowed myself to give in to the grief on Christmas eve if I need to but never Christmas day . When my grandsons have decorated my tree I see my husband standing by it. I have always put my tree up the first weekend in December like we always did and another decorations. Christmas was always a big deal growing up and we always had dad's homemade sausage rolls and mince pies for breakfast. I love Christmas carols and 'In the bleak mid winter' is my favourite. Even though an atheist do like watching and singing along to the Christmas carols from Kings each year.

I have been getting Christmas presents since the start of October as when I think of something I buy it otherwise I forget. Hence my lists everywhere .

Went to my craft group on Thursday as usual but have decided I am never going again . It's big an important part of my life for 5 years but after Thursday had enough. It's been coming on since before my holiday in York . I got there on Thursday 7 sitting down one had asked for our box which came not long after I arrived . We where told the other week we where not allowed into the room until 12.45 that's why I catch a later bus now. But what annoyed me no one had gotten any mugs out of the cupboard ready for drinks. The box can while I was taking off my coat and sorting out my stuff . No one opened the box to get all the things out so I did as usual. A member who started last week helped me with the drinks . I put the cake I had made on plates and biscuits out of the tin. Then one who started weeks ago came to me and said are you poisoning me no sugar she hadn't asked for any. The tables hadn't been cleaned even though they look clean they aren't as I wipe them down every week with wipes before anyone puts their work down. The ones if us on fixed incomes always but tea bags etc when we notice it's getting low but there are 3 who are wealthy and occasionally bring biscuit. And never make drinks and clear off when it's time to tidy up and wash up . I always take a tea towel and there are 5 that will take it in turns to wash. On the bus home decided it was my last time as fed up off those that don't help. Plus my gel printing class there was no difference between the haves and have nots and everyone took in paints ,canvas etc in every week and we laughed and helped eachother. We all set out and cleaned up. And laughed. Don't remember last time I laughed at my craft group.

So posted on our what's app group about why I was leaving . I had thought about contacting the 2 who started it but thought sod it . Then got told by one I should have run it by then first. Which made me sure I had made the right decision. I will miss some of them but not all.

Having mother and daughter coming today for lunch . They can only come to craft group during school holidays but we have met up several times as we get along really well. Last time they where hear 5 hours that's why I asked them to lunch as it was 7pm last time they where here The time flew by.

So better stop rambling and get dressed and cleaning after breakfast.

Have the best day you can 😊

I feel a fraud coming on here as I only have occasional lapses now. I know most of you have so much more to cope with than me.
Last Sunday I'd had a lovely lunch made by my son. As I was leaving his house I tripped on the top step and fell headlong onto his driveway. My glasses cut into my face and I ended up in A & E having lots of stitches in my face and an x-ray showed a nasal fracture.
My son was so good. He rang 999 but an ambulance wouldn't arrive for 5 hours so he called a taxi. He kept reassuring me and reminded me so much of my DH who was so caring in those situations. My other son drove 3 hours to get to me and then stayed for 5 days till I was able to cope.
Doodle I know you will understand why I was thinking of DH while I was going through all this. Christmas is a difficult time when you are missing your DH. The first few Christmases I was very aware of his absence. As time has gone by I just remember the happy times we had and enjoy all the new people in my life, grandchildren, who he, sadly, never met.
Sweetpeasue,*HVDY*, Wyllow, scaredycat and anyone I've missed I think you are all amazing facing such difficulties with strength and a will to overcome them.

Afternoon all.
Nadateturbe- Hello! Lovely to hear from you but sorry you are still so weary.. screens do make your eyes tired don’t they - so it’s a bit of a double whammy.
Glad you got to art- yes the social side is as important as the work done- hope yo7 feel better soon.
SweetPeaSue- You have certainly made great strides since we first met you. I feel the same as you about everyone- I feel like we are real friends.
I hope you have a wonderful week . It is so lovely there- even the spiders are nice!!
Look forward to some photos.
HVDY- Good luck with the big towel and Jaffa- mind his paws and claws.
That tea sounded wonderful- what a nice way to say thank you.
Afternoon tea is my favourite meal out- hope the cakes went down well later.
Doodle- glad you had a nice day yesterday .Yes Christmas can be very hard but your family will be there for you and the Church will look beautiful. The Christmas story is one full of hope .
Just knowing your Sons are nearby is enough- you know they are there and that’s comforting isn’t it.
Thank you our mum was lovely . We try and remember all the good times and how funny and clever she was. We loved her very much.
SNAP with the Tinnitus- mine sounds exactly like yours but it is only in one ear thank goodness. Worse if tired or stressed- I expect yours is the same.
Hope you have the lovely sunshine today.
Wyllow- a Tinnitus trio! I feel in good company.
What a great achievement to get out for a walk by yourself-too right about the festering. The more you can do it the easier it will become- sorry bum and tum rebelled - they,ll get used to it too. It was a good tired to feel - hope you slept well.
Looking for your post is one of the first things I do in the morning- always so pleased to see it.
Whiff- is that called pulsatile tinnitus? That must be quite difficult to deal with - but love your attitude to it.
What a shame you felt you had to quit the Craft Group -no point going though if the people do your head in.
You,ve made some nice friends from it though . Hope you had a nice day with them today and plenty of laughs.
EllieAnne - the weekends must come round too quickly for you. I hope you,ve been able to get out and have a walk.
Thinking of you.

Candy,Nanny, Allsorts, AGAA4 and any I,ve left out and those just reading have the best weekend you can

Doodle Glad you got out to your art class yesterday. It seems there are a few of us with Tinnitus. Mine started after a car crash (2007?) and is there all the time - hissing and humming. Christmas will be hard for you, but your loving family will help.

Wyllow3 Well done on being motivated and going for a walk yesterday. What sets your tum off? Hope it's settled down now.

AGAA4 What a horrible thing to happen to you. You must have been so upset and shaken up, too. What lovely, caring sons you've got, particularly one to stay with you for a few days. How are you now?

Whiff What a pity you cannot return to your craft group. It's often the way that one or 2 people organise things and set things out whilst the others sit and let them.

ScaredyCat, EllieAnne, Nanny2507, SweetpeaSue8< *Candy6 and others - hope you've been ok today.

It's been a boring day - washing, cleaning etc., but Son1 and children called in briefly, which was nice. They'd all been to Nottingham's famous Goose Fair last night and he emailed me all the photos. He asked our advice about what washing machine to buy. Hope everyone has a cosy evening x

Wyllow a really long post from you. So glad you’re connecting more. You went out too which is good even if you’re not feeling great, you are trying. Well done.
Yes church has been so good for me.
Whiff sorry about your tinnitus. Must be unsettling to hear your heart beating. Mine is just a really high pitch. So loud sometimes. The more stressed I am the louder it gets.
Sorry you’re giving up your craft group but I can understand why. Nice you are having that mother and daughter round hope you keep in touch with them. Will you look round for something else to do?
AGA you are not a fraud and in this group no one’s problems are more important than someone else’s. We don’t work like that. Things affect people different ways and everyone is valued. I do hope you keep popping in it’s nice to hear from you,
Oh I’m so sorry about your accident. Must have shaken you up a lot. Your sons were so good and obviously took good care of you. Of course you will miss your husband who probably cared for you and would have been with you looking after you. Yes I do understand. Thank you for your thoughtful comments about Christmas. I must admit I am a bit worried. I am very sentimental and emotional. Christmas songs and the joy of Christmas which I have always loved now make me feel sad because I can’t have that contented feeling anymore. At least my husband got to see his grandchildren grow up. I’m sorry yours didn’t. Do you mind me asking how long ago he died?
Scaredycat you are a really good friend to everyone. You are so caring and kind. Yes the tinnitus is very high pitched.
Had a lovely afternoon with friends thank you. We went to the hospice which might sound strange as it was where DH died. I find it peaceful there. I am so grateful that DH got out of hospital and was in a beautiful place when he died. He was only there just 3 days but it made a difference to how I felt and how he felt. It is a lovely place to go for coffee with friends and we can sit and look out over the lake.
HVDY yes there are a lot with tinnitus. Mine is worse since DH died. Probably the stress. Can you tune yours out when you are occupied with doing something?
I’ve done some housework too before going out, Glad you had a nice visit from your son and children
Ellie Anne Candy Nadateturbe * Nanny* hope you all have a restful and pleasant weekend.

Sweetpeasue how are you getting on? Did you have a good journey. Hopefully it’s been a lovely day. Where are you staying?

Whiff So sorry you've decided to leave your craft group as you've had such fun and laughter there. I really do understand though how groups can change. Hope your day with the craft group friends you got on with went really well. It's great when you connect so well with someone. No not Osteoporosis (has bone scan about 3/4 yrs ago). Ribs hurting when I have pains around back and chest/shoulders and think it's to do with all the other body pains.
AGAA4 Please don't think you're a fraud- as Doodle says we all have various problems and worries that affect us and are very real to each of us. That fall sounds so horrible and must have really shook you up. So nice of your son to stay for a few dys and you must have so appreciated that. I'm sorry you're on your own and can only imagine how gard that is. Do come in whenever you feel you want to. Hope you're feeling a bit better.
Wyllow I was so delighted to read this morning you'd been out for a walk in Botanical Gardens yourself. It's really so good and I'm so pleased you did that because I know how much it must have taken to do it alone.
Scaredycat We all sort of know each other here and it's a safe place to be. Thankyou but not sure there are nice spiders. They don't do harm , I know, I just can't bear them.
H VDY Hope tomorrow is more exciting! Nice to have a visit from your son and family though.
Doodle So understandable about Christmas and all the focus on family celebrations and loved ones. All lovely of course- but without that special person who has always been part of you.... I'm so sorry and you are well to focus on the real meaning of Christmas. Music and carols bring such emotion --it can be too much sometimes.
Yes we've arrived here at the cottage nr Windermere where we stayed last April. Extremely tired, both of us, but it's been a sunny day for travelling. We're feeling so tired and just hoping we sleep tonight. Had a cuppa outside in the garden before we unpacked our suitcases and was so quiet apart from the birds. Sleep well yourself Doodle.

Wishing all a peaceful night in mind and body. Love to all not personally mentioned.x

One of those days when I have read everyone's day but not up to a long post.

Dressing gown day. Hiding from the world which seems all too much.

Think you did the right thing about the group, Whiff.

AGAA4 what everyone says, no hierarchy of feelings in here!

Sweetpeasue I hope that you sleep well and that it's sunny tomorrow.

I'm glad you felt it was the right thing to go to the hospice Doodle.

Sounds like a useful but dull day, HVDY

Scaredycat a welcome post - as it always is.

Waves and thoughts to all BD's, see you tomorrow.

Whiff I’m sorry about your group but sometimes you have to leave if it’s causing you stress.
I’m in a quandary about my small church group. Recently 2 new couples joined and everything has changed. The men especially like the sound of their own voices and it was all about them. Their wives like to talk too. People who have been coming for ages couldn’t get a word in and one man who really researches the bible and shares some very interesting facts didn’t say a word. Another person told me he’s not coming back because he’s already left a group because one of the men was extremely rude to him.
I never had much to say but I liked my little group and it was another escape.
Sweet pea sue enjoy your break. I’ve only been there once but it is beautiful.
Having more horrible thoughts about the lady I don’t like.
Everywhere I go she seems to be there. She has her husband push her around in a wheelchair and makes sure she sits where everyone can see her. She’s not disabled and can walk with a walker she’s just extremely obese and very greedy.
I’ve been praying for help with my feelings because I know I am wrong.

Hi all.

Had another marathon chat with my Sister this morning .Cant believe my niece still has no date for her Op - it’s been many months now. My Sister looked very well-thank goodness for FaceTime and being able to see her every week.

HVDY- Another member of the Tinnitus gang. So sorry you were involved in a car accident years ago.
At least your boring day brightened up later. I love a surprise visit as I,m sure you do. I,ve heard of the Goose Fair but don’t really know what it is or what it celebrates. I bet the kids enjoyed it.
AGAA4 - what a horrible accident - it must have shocked you so much. Not to mention must also have been very painful. Did your glasses break as well? Ah your Sons take after their Dad- kind and considerate.
Echoing Doodle- you are not a fraud- we are all equal here and look out for each other. It’s nice to have you here.
SweetPeaSue- Glad you arrived safely- it must be lovely to be back.
Windermere is beautiful - do you go for a boat trip if the weather is nice?
Hope you slept well after your journey and that today has been another sunny one. Enjoy every minute.
Doodle- I understand why you feel at peace when you visit the Hospice. Although it’s so sad that he died there it’s a place where you remember him more comfortable and surrounded with peace and love in those 3 days.
It’s weird isn’t it that tinnitus is more noticeable if somebody mentions it or you think about it. I would love just one day that was noise free wouldn’t you.
Hope you enjoyed Church this morning and spent time with your friends.
Wyllow - what a shame yesterday was not so good for you. Maybe your solo walk had taken it out of you - it was still a great step though.
The world is a wonderful place but your experiences over the last years have turned it into somewhere threatening.
Keep trying when you can Wyllow- the kinder times will come.
Sending an encouraging Hug.
EllieAnne- it’s such a pity when disruptive and loud people come into a group and spoil the atmosphere. Maybe they won’t keep coming- it’s a pity for you to lose something you enjoy.
I don’t think that nasty lady is worth getting upset about.
She’s probably grumpy as she’s let herself get so big . It would do her good to get out of that chair a bit more or she really will become disabled.
Hope your family are ok.
Love to all BDs and readers.

HVDY I didn't know you had Tinnitus -it must be so annoying to have it there all the time. I also didn't realise it could start after traumatic event -as Scaredycat. Was that the car accident that took your poor brother? Such awful things in life , I'm so sorry.
Wyllow Sorry for your dressing gown day yesterday. Do hope today is a little better. It must be wearying having to make an effort every day. Hope your tum is OK today. I think feeling so very low or stress can make physical problems worse. Beginning to believe this is much more the case than I ever realised. Be kind to yourself.
EllieAnne Sorry your church group is being spoilt for you and , most likely, the others too. Nothing ever stays the same and I hope that's the case there and someone trys to speak up and can drop some heavy hints when the new men start monopolising the meetings.
I expect that lady in wheelchair has no idea of her affect on others. I hope you manage to enjoy the meetings and not let her spoil it for you. She's maybe pretty miserable inside and I doubt she draws real friends to her. You are such a kind person and it's a shame things are spoiling the things you need outside your home.

Just so sorry I can't mention everyone.
Felt awful this morning but tried to carry on and mooch around Windermere shops. Pain was terrible. We drove to Garden Centre in Ambleside to get some bird food and nuts for squirrel. Could hardly get in n out of car so have spent entire afternoon on sofa with max painkillers. Extraordinary. Pray I'm not going to end up like this for future! Sorry everyone , I'm so upset about it friends.
Hopefully new day tomorrow.DH being so good about it.
Doodle Hope your day has been OK and you've had company. Sending a large hug as usual. Xx

Doodle The hospice sounds like a peaceful and relaxing place to sit and remember loved ones, and looking at a lake must be so calming.

EllieAnne Don't let a couple of loud-mouthed people put you off going to the group you like. They might not become regulars, anyway. The lady in the wheelchair is probably fed-up with herself and her life. Try not to take things personally, just keep with the friends you've got there are ignore what anyone else is doing or saying.

SweetpeaSue No, my brother died in 1975. My car crash was 2007 (I think), when I was driving along and some stupid woman reversed out of her drive straight into me, not looking, which pushed my car across the road into oncoming traffic (a bus route, too). I'm sorry you're having all that pain. Has anything in particular started it off? I hope things will settle down and that you can get out tomorrow.

Wyllow3 Tomorrow's a new day, hopefully a better one than yesterday.

ScaredyCat Goose Fair has been going for centuries. It started as a livestock market, but for many years has been a funfair (huge) every October, originally for 3 days but now 10 days. Very expensive, too, apparently - £5-£15 per ride! I'm glad your sister is doing so well. It must be a relief for you to see her looking well. Could your niece get in touch with the consultant to try to get an appointment soon? She shouldn't have to keep waiting like that.

It's been a lazy day here. Son2 had to have his car fixed, which cost £600, so he borrowed DIL's car, parked somewhere near the Goose Fair, police towed the car away (there were warnings displayed) and it cost £140 to get it back! Silly man. Hope ALL BDers have been ok today. x

Sweetpeasue your cottage sounds lovely. I hope you have a good time there.
Sorry today has been a painful one. I’m hoping a good night sleep will improve things and you have a better day tomorrow.
You’ve been a lot better recently. Don’t lose heart.
Wyllow thanks for coming in. Weekends are long. What days does your carer come?
Ellie Anne I’m sorry your little group has been overtaken by new people. Maybe they will settle down and not be so full on. Ashamed someone has already left because of them.
Sometimes it’s hard not to dislike someone especially if they upset you. Hope you manage to avoid the wheelchair lady,
Scaredycat glad your sister is doing well. Quite worrying about your niece though.
Yes I had a nice time at church. We all had lunch together after and it was very pleasant. Lots of good food and nice company.
Went shopping after and bought some bits from M&S and did my food shop.
Hope you’ve had a good day.
HVDY yes I love going to the hospice it is so calm and peaceful there. Wow that fair must be a big one. It sounds very expensive. What a shame about your son and the car. Oh dear.
We live and learn as they say.
A lazy day does you good sometimes.
Take care all and sleep well

That is a really difficult change, Ellie Anne, with your little group. Really hard to know what to do. Try sticking it out for now? But difficult.
I dont think you are "wrong" to have strong feelings about your lady however. I think you've said before you arent alone in those feelings about her. x

You have a lovely relationship with your sister, Scardeycat. Thank goodness for facetime. so glad she looks well, I recall the long weeks when you couldnt be sure she would be at all better.It does seem forever, for your niece. waiting for the op.

My disabled grandaoughter has a date for breaking and resetting her legs, its an 8 week haul for the family. Yes, you and Sweetpeasue describe well how my world feels.

So really sorry it was a pain day *Sweetpeasue. Maybe the journey took it out of you more than you'd hoped. You did right to give into your needs for meds and the sofa. Course you are upset. I can understand your fears "it might always be like this".

HVDY That sounds a lot for a ride! Imagine a family tyring not to spend too much. You've been really busy, you deserve a lazy day. Oh no, re the tow away - infuriating.

Doodle, just Wednesdays, but she is off next week then a fornight's time, so until we have a chunk of time I dont think she'll feel in my life.
Your church sounds an exceptionally nice one and very caring, lunches for company whoever needs it.

Today was washing clothes and shower day. Next week is going to be difficult, its try and get meds week, and an appointment tomorrow with MH people another new face - consultant am dreading it.

Night night BD's.

Thank you for your support. I woke up this morning and didn’t want to face the day. Nothing special happening but feel overwhelmed. It’s a cleaning and shopping day and should change the bed but can’t be bothered. Phoned dd yesterday. Didn’t speak much and she cut it short because she had to take washing out of machine. So I feel lower on her priorities than the washing!
Oh well I d better get started. I tend to rush through the house work so I can get out.I hope you all have a good day and that something nice happens to surprise you.

Doodle Glad you had a good day yesterday, with church, then lunch and shopping. Hope today has been another goo day.

Wyllow3 Your granddaughter has a big operation ahead, and the family will be busy caring for her (even more than they already need to). Hope all goes well with that. Will it make it easier for your GD to get around at all?

EllieAnne Perhaps your daughter had to see to the washing as she's back at work today? Is she usually chatty?

Went to the day centre - it was salmon, new potatoes, cabbage and broccoli (all over-cooked, I suppose they have to cater for a lot of people who have got dentures!). Overall, a nice day. Hope ALL BDers have been ok today x

Hi all.
Sorry to hear pain spoilt your day yesterday. Try not to worry about the future none of us know what that holds.
Don’t be sorry to let us know you,re upset- pretty normal as you are feeling scared.
Hope you have a better day today. Have a cuppa and watch the squirrels and birds enjoy their treats. Try to relax in that peaceful place. Your DH sounds such a caring person.
HVDY- my niece is not very good at being persistant or making a fuss and my Sis is like that too. I would keep pestering until someone listened .
What a b…r about your Sons car. That turned into an expensive day for him. The Goose fair must bring lots of people to Nottingham. It’s a bit pricey for families though isn’t it.
Hope Little Girl is making progress now nd not so uncomfortable.
Doodle- It’s lovely that your Church is such a happy place for you. So companiable to have lunch afterwards- that’s how a church should be.
You had lots to do - M & S has some nice things in at the moment and their food is so good .We get a few treats there every week as we have one of those big stores very close.
Hope today has been kind to you.
Wyllow- Ah your little GD has a lot to contend with. 8 weeks is a long time in a young persons life. Yes much upheaval and organisational problems for the family also worrying about her too.How old is she? A nice nurse once said to me when I was worried about my youngest son that children who have difficult health conditions are given special gifts of character and resilience .
I,m sorry you are apprehensive about your MH Appt today. You may find that the new Consultant is somebody you,ll feel comfortable and confident with. I do hope so.
Sending love and encouragement.
EllieAnne- try not to imagine the worse. Your DD might just have been really pushed for time and busy- she probably didn’t even think about it. You are so hard on yourself - you are very important to your family. Dust can always wait if you have something better to do!!

This afternoon we have been to a small Garden centre that is a Charity for helping people with special needs to develop horticultural skills ,craftwork and life skills. It is a joyful place and helps people feel less isolated . We had tea and cake and I took photos for my Group subjects this month.

Nadateturbe,Candy,Whiff, Nanny,AGAA, and anyone I have missed out plus readers wishing you a restful evening and night.

Wyllow your your poor little granddaughter. How old is she? Must be hard for her mum and dad to cope with the thought of her being frightened or in pain. Hope it doesn’t cause her too much distress. Shame you aren’t having much continuity with your carer at the moment. Hope it settles down soon and you get to feel supported and helped.
Sorry you’re so anxious about tomorrow. I do hope it goes well and you get the help you need.
Ellie Anne I’ve had a miserable day too. I feel for you because it’s hard to be upbeat and positive when you feel down. Hope your day turned out better than you thought.
HVDY shame about your meal. It’s usually been so good in the past. No not a good day today unfortunately. I got really upset this morning as I went to have my flu jab. DH was with me last time and the place was full of couples having their jabs together, it really got to me and I came out and sat in the car and sobbed. Then I went to collect my prescription and remembered when I used to collect DH’s too and that set me off again. I’ve just had a large 🍷 and hoping tomorrow is a better day.
Scardycat what a lovely place the garden centre sounds. It must bring such pleasure to the people who get to learn there.
Tea and cake too. That’s nice.
Sweetpeasue hope you’ve been feeling better today and managed to enjoy yourself,