Black Dog 23

Hi all.
It’s quiet in here today - hope everyone is doing as well as they are able.
HVDY- glad Jaffa is home again. Obviously feels happy to be back with you as he had a cuddle. I expect his mouth was a bit sore but at least he had the gravy. Hope he had a peaceful night and you too!! I expect he was hungry this morning but probably best to keep him in for a few hours. He has many years to come with you - a very happy ending.
Wyllow- I think for you it’s a good idea to sort out your meals like that. It means you get a good mix of food without having to worry about it. How about trying the odd treat? I,m sure there are things you might fancy- you do not deserve punishment for anything - you are worth so much more.
I,m so sorry your day was so very difficult yesterday. I hope today had the sunshine you need and if even for a moment something reminded you of how brave you are. We all care so much.
Love to all BDs and those who read or occasionally post.

Wyllow3 Although you might have the same meals every week, do you treat yourself to the odd cake, chocolate bar or whatever you like? I think it's important to have a bit of something nice to eat or drink. How have you been today?

ScaredyCat Jaffa ate his turkey later last night. He's eaten some food today (not a lot, and only soft, wet stuff). His mouth is still sore but he's groomed himself a bit today. DH and I took LittleGirl out all day, so he had a quiet rest upstairs, with the heating on (he often sits on the patio furniture when she's here). He's got to have a check-up tomorrow. How's your day been?

How has everyone been? x

Scaredycat what wonderful news about your DIL. That must be a big relief. Nice you had coffee with your friend. Hope the re tests turn out ok.
HVDY glad Jaffas back home with you. Poor chap no wonder he’s wobbly on his feet, I am sure cuddles are the order of the day. Hope he picks up tomorrow. When is he allowed out?
Wyllow could you not buy some food that you look forward to eating. Something that you might look forward to in the evening. Why are you punishing yourself you’ve been through enough trauma. Be kind to yourself.
Sweetpeasue I hope the pain hasn’t been too bad today. I’m sure the worry about your DH’s health doesn’t help either.
Hope you’ve had a better day.
I had a lovely time with DS 2 and the dogs this morning. So nice to cuddle up with the fluffy ones.

Wyllow Hope today has been better for you. I've done that-- taken extra med when feel restless , can't sleep ect. As long as not too often don't think it can harm. Hope you get the other nice MH worker next week and the one this week will walk with you.
HVDY What a lot of teeth for Jaffa to have out. No wonder he only felt like gravy.Oh just seen your other post and he had some turkey. Poor thing , I do hope his mouth won't take long to heal. Lovely to have Littlegirl today. You'll want to have a quiet evening tonight.
Scaredycat 31 cms is a very large growth indeed- your poor niece. Are your pansies spreading a little now. Mine seem to have remained the same small size. Think the rain has kept them too moist.
Doodle I'm so glad you had a nice time with your son today. I'm sure you may have already said, can't remember, but what sort of dogs are they. It happens we had fluffball today too. It's lovely when they like a cuddle. I didn't see fluffball v much as I had to go to MH group this afternoon, been a busy day. Yes it's hard for my DIL and my son . I don't really see DIL on her own ( yet) try to play it by ear about her mum. My son tells me bits but I just let her mum tell me the odd things she wants to. I know how hard it is for the person to process such awful diagnosis as I remember what my own mum was like.
Yes I'm really worried about DH as he's chesty and tired and gets breathless. Not till January for Vascular referral. He has Rheumatology appt in November.

Came downstairs in night as restless. Worrying about everything and overtired. Got through MH group (can be v tiring , listening) . DH waited outside for DGS to walk down the Rd after school ( he wanted to start doing that) . I got back a little later and then DH took dog back while I played with GS. Then we drove him back home.
DH looked really shattered and I'm tired now but glad I was able to do it.
DIL's mum unable to have dog as much so we're doing what we can. Having fluffball Thursdays and Fridays so far.
She's lovely - it's just a bit back n forth .
Difficult to gage when pain will be bad.

Wishing all a peaceful night and hoping tomorrow will see some brighter moments. Xx



.

*

ScaredyCat Sorry, I missed it yesterday, but that's great news about your DIL getting the all-clear. What a relief. Hope your friend gets ok alright.

Doodle Jaffa kept staggering to the back door wanting to go out yesterday evening and night - we didn't let him, but as he was much brighter this morning, he sat on a garden chair when I hung the washing out. Glad you had a good time with your son today. Did you go for a meal or anything?

SweetpeaSue Is the chestiness in your husband a new thing, or has he got a cold or anything? You're very good to have the dog, and I'm sure it was lovely to see your GS, but it's all tiring, isn't it?

We had LittleGirl at 7.30, and after breakfast we went to Next to collect my order, then had 3 hours at a country park - she walked a bit of the way and had a play on the slide and seesaw. Lunch was at a pub, and she went home at 3.30. 8 hours was long enough. DH out with Son1 this evening.
Hope ALL BDers have a cosy evening x

HVDY Ah I think Jaffa will recover well in your loving care.
What a long time you were out at the country park. I expect Littlegirl will sleep well tonight , as will you. Up at 7-30 would be so very early for me- I think you are an amazing grandparent.
The breathlessness in DH started with the GCA. They found chest nodules but they're saying they were incidental finding and no need to worry about them. The breathlessness could be to do with inflammation caused by GCA which I'm going to take up with Rheumatologist in November. So much we're not being told.

Sorry I'm not great lately.
I'm not monitored at present with MH services. The MH group thing is strange and I can only identify with one who's 89yrs. I'm 68 .
I still think no one will ever understand what happened to me. The NHS failed me and is now failing DH.

A dressing gown day. At this time of night I vow I will get out the next day or order new clothes online, but when I wake it seems well…just so hard on my own…occupied myself with posting. Tum blocked.
Yes - here is an element of feeling don’t deserve treats but also no sweet tooth. Could buy olives or something maybe.

Doodle - yes it is peverse but I dont enjoy eating much - part of my MH stuff when in a bad patch.

A caring post there as ever Scaredycat

I’m glad to hear HVDY that Jaffa is eating and grooming a little. Resilient little fellow! Sounded like a busy but happy time with LittleGirl and pub lunch.

Good to read of cuddles Doodle -touch matters xx

Yes Sweetpeasue will walk with worker after resisting strongly we should Do More different Things.

Yes, re the extra med bit, sometimes its a blessing and I noticed you did it too.
I’m so sad for your DiL and mum x and really really sorry about your worries for DH.
Tough night there too, the hardest time? Despite it being tiring, glad you both saw DGS.

The NHS is struggling and we all feel it - I’m glad to be in the service, but not enough, and clearly it’s not been enough for you and DH. X

Night night to all BD’s, best sleeps possible.

Wyllow I really feel for you and your ongoing hard times alone with no communication other than here and your MH worker. Yes, I know you have your son and sis, but also that you don't want to trouble them with real stuff.
Hope you can get tum un-blocked- can't underestimate that horrible state and must make you very miserable too!
Do treat yourself to olives ,please, if that's your treat- no 'maybes' and good for you.
Oh dear the 'different things'-- that's what yesterday's task was in MH group for this next week. Had to actually write something down. I chickened out and wrote Dental appt which I've put off for quite a while but easier than other things.
Yes NHS -I can see all the cracks in the service now -as well as the poor overworked staff. I reallythink there is so very much triaging going on right down the line and a lot of people waiting 'forever'. I so wish you could get the help you need.
We all really care for you and want so much for you to be well. So glad there is this place where you can come and tell it how it is. Do keep coming in and koko. Hard to think it now, I know, but I'm sure you will get yourself back and be able to get back a life. Very much love and a warm hug coming your way.
Do get the olives.❤️

SweetpeaSue So sorry you and your husband are going through all this. Not long until his rheumatologist appointment, so perhaps write down all the questions you want to ask. The NHS can be marvellous when it is working well, but as we know, it can also be the opposite. You say you can only identify with one lady at the MH group and she's much older. Age doesn't matter if you understand each other. One of the ladies at the day centre I go to has a daughter my age (65) and calls me "Girl" but I get on well with her.

Wyllow3 You DO deserve some treats/something good in life. If not food items, some hand creams/shower gel/a good book/a drink or even a new nightie or pyjamas. You can get back to your "old self". Koko.

It's a very foggy morning here. Hope it will brighten up. Seeing eldest GD after the vet appointment. We'll go for lunch and perhaps a look around some shops. Hope ALL BDers manage to have a brighter day x

HVDY Thankyou for caring. I certainly will have the questions on paper for Rheumatologist. I do understand the age thing. I think I've always got on better with older people and this lady is lovely.
Hope that fog burns off and you see some sun today. It's lovely and sunny here at present. Have a great afternoon with your GD! She must love meeting up with you.
Scaredycat I'm so sorry about your friend's news and I hope the outcome won't be as bad as feared. Sometimes follow ups after abnormal results can prove to be OK, but understandably you will be worried.
Wonderful about your DIL's good news though.

Don't think I'll be going to reading group today.

Hope everyone has a decent day.

Hello I am new here and just wanted to say hi to anyone who is feeling life is a struggle today. I am trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other however hard it is. Wishing us all more peaceful times.

Hi all.
HVDY- I hope Jaffa had a successful check up and the vet is pleased with him. How did you get him in the carrier today?
What a nice day you had yesterday- Little Girl certainly gets you out and about. Hope you didn’t have too much discomfort.
It was foggy here too earlier on but now it’s beautiful.
Hope you,ve had a good day with DGD - “Girly” days are fun aren’t they .
Yes Brilliant news about DiL - she has been so brave. They live a long way away but we all keep in touch. I felt so happy she had phoned me to to tell her news.its one of my Stepsons wife.
SweetPeaSue- yes my nieces growth sounds ridiculously big but you said your young relative had a big one too. There must be a reason why they leave them so long. I hope she recovered well.
My pansies haven’t done too well at all- you are right there has been too much rain and they look really sad. Weirdly the blue ones have done the best.
You are much younger than me but we get on well don’t we!! If you click - you click. I expect that lady feels the same in your group. Think I might have to call you Girl too😀😀
Enjoy the sunshine if you can - it’s not been around much lately and always makes you feel brighter. Your DH has much to contend with so hope he too can enjoy the sun
Doodle- yes very happy for our DiL. She has had a very rough time- but is a strong character. Worried about my friend but she is made of strong stuff too🤞🤞
Glad you had a nice time with your Son and his dogs. Cuddling fluffy Grandchildren is very therapeutic. Are they little and fluffy or big old fluffies? My Son FT me this lunchtime and the Church bells in his tiny village were chiming- one of his 3 dogs always sings along to them. I could hear him really clearly.
Hope it was a nice Church day today and you were able to have coffee wit( your friends.
Wyllow- if anyone deserves treats - it’s you!! If you like Olives or whatever takes your fancy please be nice to yourself and go for it next shopping day.They will do you good too and your tum may appreciate some different food. Take a tip from Jaffa- food is good. Like your idea of new clothes online- it’s nice just browsing too .
I remember you buying a nice jumper when you had your shopping day - it doesn’t seem so long ago. Hope you,ve got out with the worker today - it’s so lovely today.
We are all with youx
secc- Hello and welcome. Glad you found your way here - it’s a kind non judgemental place.
Your attitude is brave and determined and we all know how hard it can be sometimes.
Peaceful times is a kind wish - thank you. Call in whenever you can.

Candy,Nadateturbe ,Whiff,Nanny,Allsorts and all readers and posters wishing you a kind day.

Scaredycat You made me laugh about your son's dog that 'sings' to the chiming bells-- and fluffy grandchildren! You have a lovely way with words . As for myself being a girl- I think we all have the little girl inside don't we. Re the pansies- hope they recover , they're usually quite resilient but I guess only ho much rain they can take.
sec Hi and thankyou for your wishes for peace. Peace of mind is such a valuable thing isn't it? Sorry you're going through some hard times too and it takes a lot of effort to keep going sometimes. I hope you will soon find it easier to put one foot in front of the other. Can feel like wading through treacle but when a good day happens it refreshes hope. Do come in again .

Didn't manage reading group. 2 hrs long time to sit on a hard chair with stiffness.
DH went to get Fluffball and she cheered us up. She fell asleep on me and it felt so peaceful with her warm breathing body lying there. Unlike a hot water bottle she remained warm.
Hoping all have had a decent day. Love to those who haven't been in for a while and hoping things are OK.

ScaredyCat I hope your friend gets on alright and the outcome won't be as bad as feared. Funny about your son's dogs "singing" .

SweetpeaSue Having a pet to cuddle is lovely. They're very therapeutic.

secc Welcome. We all have some struggles at times, ut we all try to support each other on here. Do come back and post whatever you feel comfortable with sharing.

It wasn't a good day for poor Jaffa - he was well-behaved, but when the vet looked at his mouth, she said the gums weren't healing, were inflamed,very sore, and had pockets of food in. We left him there to be treated. Vet rang later, they'd done blood tests, found he's got FIV (a feline equivalent of AIDS). She said he needs to be an indoor cat. Fetched him at 6, he's on anti-inflammatories, painkillers and a special high-protein, mousse food. He's got to be checked again on Friday and have an antibiotic injection then. Poor little boy. He's mine now, so we'll do whatever he needs to keep him as well as possible.

Hope ALL BDers have a relaxing evening x

Oh no HVDY. Poor Jaffa- though lucky Jaffa to have yourself look after him. He looks so well in the photos you sent with a lovely shiny coat. I am sorry, your heart must have sank to hear the news. He's so very lucky to have found you( or you found him?) Crossed fingers the anti- inflammatories work soon and good that his pain is being addressed.
Pets are therapeutic I agree.
I hope your hip pain has been better today too. X

SweetpeaSue I was close to tears when the vet told me. I've Googled FIV, so I'll be better informed, and I've ordered him some vitamin stuff (obviously for cats), and some different food (I'd only just had 40 pouches of a good cat food on Sunday which he won't now be able to eat). Whoever had Jaffa at one time hadn't looked after him at all, the bastard. He'll be ok with us. My hip hasn't been too bad, thanks. Fireworks going off somewhere nearby this evening (morons).

Sweetpeasue the dogs are a German shepherd and a golden retriever. Both lovely dogs.
Glad you managed to spend time with your grandson too. Fluffball sounds so cuddly.
Sorry you didn’t get to reading group.
You are right about peace of mind. I don’t think I’ll ever have that again or contentment.
Do hope your DH is ok. I can understand your worry and concern. Can the Gp help him get seen any earlier?
HVDY oh poor Jaffa and poor you too. That is a worry. I hope the inflammation clears up soon. Does that mean he can’t go out at all? How will you manage?
Wyllow have you ever thought about having a pet for company. You have a garden so could have a small dog or cat.
It might give you an interest in life.
I often feel ok in the evening then wonder why I, so down in the morning.
Hello secc welcome. There are many here who find life a struggle most days. Thank you for your kind message.
Scaredycat how nice your DIl told you her news herself. I’m sorry about your friend but hope the outcome is ok when tested again.
DGSs dogs are both pretty big and very fluffy. They are quite young though. I think three and five.
I had a lovely time in church today. Got upset having to go to hospital for X-ray and bloods as have been there so many times with DH. He was always so brave and I feel like a wimp.
Art tomorrow.

Doodle FIV cats are meant to stay indoors permanently as their immune system is poor and they're at risk of picking up viruses, also to prevent them passing it on to other cats (via bites). We'll cope, he'll have to adjust. He'll always get illnesses. We'll see how he goes. Glad you had a good day. Understandable you felt upset at hospital - you'd bren so many times with your husband but have now not got your rock to lean on. I hope tomorrow will be better for you.

Followed your days and much love for the troubles - such honesty here makes all the difference. (and thank you for all comments)
A warm welcome to secc. do come and talk when you want. You are right to wish for more peaceful times in our heads, everyone here needs it, we are not alone even if hard to feel that.

I'll be in tomorrow, cant post tonight

xxx

BD's

It's been an early start - up at 6.30, LittleGirl here 7.30. DH has had a letter saying he's got sleep apnoea, with an appointment to see a consultant end of November. Going to a farm park soon. Hope everyone manages to have a decent day x

Hi all
SweetPeaSue - Fluffball sounds better than a “hottie” any day.
I agree that it is so comforting to cuddle a pet - they sometimes seem to know when you need it too.
Maybe our pansies need a cuddle- mine certainly look like they do.
Hope today is a more comfortable one for you and that you can both do something that you enjoy.
HVDY- so sorry to hear the news that Jaffa has FIV to contend with - you must have been so upset to hear that.It sounds as if his previous family were not kind to him at all and maybe even turfed him out if they had been aware of the FIV. As you sayB…..s. Our last cat was an indoor rescue cat and we had him for 10 years. He’d never been out so he stayed in. Although his aim in life was to escape he only got out half a dozen times. Jaffa will adapt as will you. The day he walked through your door saved his life- he was meant for you the kindest cat lady.
Hope DH gets some practical help in November- CPap machines are so good. My BiL was always falling asleep in the day but is now so much better.
Enjoy the Farm Park- LittleGirl will love the animals.
Doodle- What lovely dogs your Son has. The fluffy GSD are beautiful and years ago we had a GR. They must love seeing you and vice versa.
I really do understand how you feel about being in the hospital- everything reminds you of those terrible times ,the sights,the sounds,the smells. You don’t have an ounce of wimpiness . It was you being with DH that gave him the strength to deal with all that life threw at him. You are just missing his kind,calm presence to help you. Not wimpy- human.
Glad you enjoyed Church and hope today’s Art will have you producing a masterpiece.
Doodle- I wish you the peace of mind and contentment you need so much- it will come one day when you least expect it . But it takes time to accept the enormous change. Be kind to yourself kind lady
Wyllow- just glad to see you in. That must have been a difficult day and you were awake til late.
If wishing could make it happen we all,I know, wish for the kinder times to return for you and we can get our old Wyllow back
Hope today is less tormenting for you and that you,ve been able to get out for a while. Kokoxxx

ScaredyCat I've always thought it unkind to keep a cat indoors (had cats for 44 years) but I'm now going to consider cat-proofing the garden with netting stuff - Son2's garden has been done, and their 2 cats can't get out, and no cats can get in. How's your day going?

Went to a farm park - LittleGirl saw sheep, goats, donkeys, etc. She loved that, then she played in the sandpit and on little bikes. Had lunch there, and she played with balloons and a toy kitchen. After that, we went to a playgroup for an hour, which she enjoyed. She's now fast asleep on the settee Hope everyone's ok today x

HVDY What a caring person you are. You're going the extra mile - and then some- to ensure Jaffa has good quality of life. I've thought that most cats have an inborn wild streak and need freedom so you must feel upset that Jaffa needs to be kept in. The secure garden sounds a great idea. Can't understand how some people can be so cruel with animals - why get them for goodness sake.
What a great afternoon for Littlegirl- can just imagine her little face when she comes to see you!😊
Wyllow Aw I hope today has been better for you. Is it Thursday you see MH worker? Just good to see you come in , even if not up to posting much. Hope your tum is sorted now.
Scaredycat Had Fluffball today too , yes better than a hottie haha. Such genuinely kind words to all and we so wish the peace of mind for Doodle.
Although the Pansie are looking miserable the flowers from a pet of annuals ( cottage garden) are still thriving! It's amazing there's Cornflowers ( beautiful deep blue) marigolds, other yellow ones, can't name, Dahlias and Sunflowers.
Doodle Hope today has been OK for you. It's horrible having to go to the same hospital for things. You and your DH spent so many long days there and it must hold horrid memories for you of worry and anxiety. I m glad Scaredycat said peace of mind can come later. So sorry you're going through all this.
Your son's dogs are beautiful creatures. Retrievers have such beautiful soulful eyes - they melt your heart.
sec Hope your day hasn't been too bad today and you're OK.

Went to dog friendly cafe this morning .
This afternoon took Fluffball for a run on the field behind our park. She turns into a tiger when she has the ball and won't drop it at all.
Pain now so pain relief. Tried GP surgery this morning but our GP not on till Tuesday.
Been sunny here today- mild for Autumn. Hope everyone has seen some sun wherever you are.
Love to all.x