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When to resume sex after hip replacement

(218 Posts)
ftm420 Wed 30-Oct-24 11:16:12

Sorry if this is too explicit but if you dont ask...

I'm now 3 weeks post total hip replacement and am starting to think about sex! Trouble is, my DH is (ahem) very overweight and I'm quite skinny, so the thought of missionary scares the life out of me! I also can't widen my hips much (physio has given me a 'clam shell' exercise as part of standard physio and my knees just will not part).

I can't kneel down and get back up and I can't comfortably lie on my side to just 'do him'.

Should we just wait a bit longer, given that he is feeling a bit frustrated. He has 2 hands after all! Or is there a position we could try?

TIAblush

Luckygirl3 Fri 01-Nov-24 12:09:42

www.amazon.sg/Back-Love-Sex-After-Replacement/dp/1492115568

This is the book my DD bought me after I had my hip replaced.

Usedtobeblonde Fri 01-Nov-24 12:31:31

Ooh I should love to see the illustrations, light hearted or not.

icanhandthemback Fri 01-Nov-24 12:38:42

Usedtobeblonde

How do you know they are just fantasies rather than personal experiences.😉🤭

Ugh, I don't even want to think about it. 🤢

CariadAgain Fri 01-Nov-24 13:04:53

Delia22

kircubbin2000

I find it hard to believe that many over 60s are still interested in sex.

Why not? We,'re not dead yet!!😂

.....and some of us have done enough research to have a general idea what we're expecting our "life" to be like after we're dead...

....and that has certainly included asking if there's still such a thing as sex. Answer = yes if you want to.....

Mental note = on the "to do" list - at some point after reunions with people, exploring my immediate area, doing the Life Review, etc, etc.

MayBee70 Fri 01-Nov-24 15:30:51

I do hope it’s the OP actually wanting to have sex asap and not that she’s having pressure put on her by her husband ( memories of having a very grumpy unpleasant husband…now ex husband…after having a difficult childbirth sad).

CariadAgain Fri 01-Nov-24 15:52:46

True dat - obviously.

I obviously wondered at still fancying a man who she says is very overweight - and then thought "Just because men I've known have always HAD to be slim - otherwise I wouldn't be interested" then I decided I must assume that there are women who fancy overweight men (as goodness knows - so many people, of both sexes, are very overweight these days).

Maybe it's just me that only two of the boyfriends I had were at all overweight and they didnt take long to analyse their chances of staying a boyfriend of mine before they lost that weight LOL.

But - obviously - I do hope indeed that wanting sex is coming from the OP herself and not from her husband. That would be a whole different ballgame if he's pressurising her obviously....

ReadyMeals Fri 01-Nov-24 18:56:40

Spooning with him behind you if you want PIV? No leg opening required. Otherwise hands in both directions are probably the safest until you're fully fit again.

icanhandthemback Fri 01-Nov-24 19:09:05

CariadAgain, slim people maybe nice to look at but they are not always nicer people. My husband isn't svelte (and never has been) but I fell in love with his personality which meant I actually found him attractive. Slim men often change and become larger. If you love them enough, they remain fanciable.

MamaB247 Fri 01-Nov-24 19:13:39

Wait otherwise you could end up having to go through it all again and he would have to go longer. Let him use his hands

ftm420 Sat 02-Nov-24 11:31:41

I have to say that I'm so enjoying these posts! You do make me laugh (seriously!) about life!blush

In answer to the post about whether or not DH is pressuring me - no he isn't. He does have a higher drive and always has. I do my best to 'help' but if I really don't want to, I don't!smile

MissAdventure Sat 02-Nov-24 11:34:34

I'm glad you're not offended, ftm420. smile

Sasta Tue 05-Nov-24 12:16:34

For heaven’s sake! If you are that offended by somebody asking a perfectly reasonable question, just ignore it! OP is assuming somebody on here may have had a hip replacement and had the same experience. I’m quite disappointed with some of these replies. Good luck OP, sorry I can’t help 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sasta Tue 05-Nov-24 12:19:57

Luckygirl3

www.amazon.sg/Back-Love-Sex-After-Replacement/dp/1492115568

This is the book my DD bought me after I had my hip replaced.

1st prize for most thoughtful reply!

Kamiso Tue 05-Nov-24 12:46:39

AGAA4

The advice is to wait till the anaesthetic has worn off.

Best suggestion so far!

ftm420 Tue 05-Nov-24 19:12:26

"The advice is to wait till the anaesthetic has worn off.".

Hilarious! For me, after the anaesthetic wore off (it took 8 hours instead of the 4 it usually does) the pain was so intense I was almost scraping along the ceiling!

Sex was absolutely not on the agenda grin

netflixfan Wed 06-Nov-24 21:34:37

I’ll eat it and enjoy it !!

MissAdventure Wed 06-Nov-24 23:00:26

Eat it? blush