loneliness, weekends and having a routine

I am happy to say that since my DH died I have at last come to terms with loneliness and learned that being alone need not equate to being lonely.
Yes Sundays can be hard, absolutely the worst day of the week when everybody else seems to be hosting family roast dinners (only they’re not) so I take evasive action and a friend, also widowed and I sometimes meet up for a pub or carvery Sunday lunch.

While I enjoy different activities (to distinguish the different days of the week!) I have also come to enjoy my own company, my dog, a book or film on tv - or even a solitary trip to the cinema on a Sunday afternoon.
There’s nothing to stop me going for a window shopping trip, out for a coffee and a cake or to a gallery if I feel the need of an outing and I am happy to go on my own.
My conclusion has been that you can’t alter the circumstances around you but you can adapt or alter how you react to them

Our local u3a has a meet up group for ‘Members on their own’ for people who live alone, whether single divorced or widowed, who would like to meet up with similarly-minded people for a range of activities.

As someone else suggested, I leave all my housework till the weekend, when I usually don’t speak to anyone, as I prefer to avoid the happy families/loving couples (I am a widow). I have a luxury breakfast on both days, and buy a real newspaper, which takes me hours to read.

Do you have a Facebook account?
Even though I am married and have grown adult child at home at the time. Just before Covid I was feeling the same. All my friends were busy every weekend and I seem to spend a lot of time at home which my hubby was happy to do because he worked hard all week. I found a Facebook group in my local area that was called over 40 in Young at heart social group. I joined this group and after a couple of months I finally took those first scary steps and went to a lunch they had organised . This went well and I slowly met people who I clicked with and we would go out and see live bands who played 70s and 80s covers? Also threw this group. I met a woman who had a very similar outlook on life to me and we immediately clicked and became best friends. I have since been a couple of short cruises with these women while my husband is happy to stay at home because he knows he can trust me and I am definitely not interested in hooking up with any other men.!
If you don’t have Facebook I would strongly suggest opening a Facebook account and just in the search engines for groups look for social groups in your area. Just type in your suburb name and social group or a few other keywords that you might like and see what comes up it’s to put your feet out there, but once you take those first steps your life can only change for the better !

Please excuse the lack of grammar, because I am using the microphone, because it is too hard to type all this on my little keyboard on my iPhone

Hi Navy and Peach, Why not join U3A , there should be one for your area. My local one has activities specifically for weekends.

Do you have a theatre or Arts Centre near you? I volunteer as an usher at my local theatre. I have made many friends of all ages with my fellow volunteers and there is always a performance on a Saturday evening. It is a really rewarding way to spend free time.

Did you think of joining a ‘ dating’ site. Not for partner but for friendship. I know Bumble has the option of finding just friends of both sexes. You could find some weekend company I’m sure. And new people who you might not come across in your current situation can bring new interests and fresh air into your life.

Could you start a book group or some activity you enjoy & put a notice up in a local store ?

My housebound friend who is confined to an armchair all day enjoys visits from a lady who is an active volunteer befriender. Both are happy to talk and listen. I think this is a good idea and might be organised by Age Uk if it appeals.

I volunteer at a charity shop and know how short of volunteers most are. Weekend sessions are usually available and it’s a very sociable thing to do as well as feeling really useful.

Yes I understand completely. Me too. But no it's irrational. Probably a throwback from when you worked and weekends were special I've just tried and treat it like another day and say when I get up, Sometimes days like this end up being really lovely days. It's getting a mindset I think. I allow myself to watch more TV. I go onto the programs I've recorded and haven't watched and make myself a pot of tea., I'll try a bit of gratitude and look around My home, I go for a walk and call into Costa As the one where I live has a lovely atmosphere and somebody always chats, There is a Community café if fancy it, After all, it's just another day hope it gets better , A few fairs are on at the moment for Christmas and you don't need any excuse to sit in and be cosy with this weather

I find there is so much on at weekends but I have regular things I do at weekends and I tend to miss out on them. If I had fewer commitments I'd have days out at weekends, as I can for example get to several big cities including London that I can set off early using my senior rail card and no peak time fares. I'd visit the exhibitions/interesting places etc that I want to see instead of during the week when I can't set off early because of how much extra it would.cost me. I do go to church on a Sunday morning and tend to have either a lazy afternoon doing some crafty stuff, or reading, or having a bit of a clear up, or some gardening and spend the evening watching good stuff on TV. Sometimes I'll go see a friend a bit later.
We're all different what we like, what we have to do etc.
Maybe think of it as a rhythm rather a routine, and you can feel a bit fewer to do things whenever suits you. Important to have things to help you know what day it is so you don't forget to do things you want to do, or go on the wrong day!