Newly Retired

My husband took up bowling. He didn't like the indoor so much but is enjoying the outdoor. It is good to have different hobbies so that you have more to talk about.

HI Zena its takes time. In my experience it took us both a couple of years to find things to do that we found meaningful. We both took up golf for exercise and fresh air and hopefully social but the last part didn't work as all they talk about is golf so that's a bit boring. DH took up indoor bowls but that wasn't quite enough so he trained as a coach and now is a Director doing the marketing and PR so his brain and body are engaged which is great. I found a niche as a Trustee for a charity but I do stress it takes time and you may have to try several things before you find your niche. Good luck and have a happy retirement - keep us up to date with your 'journey'.

I've got a happily occupied week. DH is due to retire next year but has just informed me that he's already set up a new company for himself and a friend and plans to do away at that. Fine by me. Its a formalisation of a hobby really. Otherwise I'd have encouraged him to try some of the U3A groups. Its all out there for you to enjoy but with no pressure. I absolutely love retired life.

Yes there is a lot out there to find something to keep us occupied.
Like your DH Teetime and Jane - my DH ex MD and had companies - so he's always on the lookout for a venture !

"householdy things to potter with" Come on, get out there and enjoy yourself whilst you still can, those householdy things can wait for a rainy day.
Our problem is only having 7 days in a week.

I love being retired! We move to a small coastal town, as did my daughter, sil and granddaughter. They live at one end and we're at the other so close but not too close!

I joined a little crafting group and a walking group and with these and the babysitting duties I find my time is taken up nicely without feeling busy.
DH has less to do, he does the garden when the weather allows and goes for local walks and beach-cleaning ... he could really do with joining one of the multitude of groups available, but actually seems happy enough. He has his beloved football of course!

There will be places you and your husband can go too, even just one outside interest will make a big difference to you both!

H started working as a gardener simply by word of mouth. He has 4 'clients' and works 2 1/2 days a week. He could have more work but I like him to have time for us to go out. He also likes to "play" with wood. He does little projects for people. Has he a hobby he can turn into a small business.

DH has finally decided to stop working from the end of November and I worry about him finding somethings to do as he has been working far too hard more or less full time since he first retired 12 years ago. I keep throwing out suggestions and have started a list which includes: tidy the garage, sort the study, 'redo' all the teak furniture etc etc. I'm hoping that motivates him to get out a bit!

Good plan Kitty. That should do the trick!

How about a big trip kitty I know you might not be able to just yet what with Mum but he could plan it out.

I am sure there are agencies who would welcome his help with DIY tasks for elderly or disabled people. My ex worked with a friend doing small jobs for pensioners at a very basic cost to them. I have heard of an organisation for men called The Shed or something similar where men meet for companionship and make items or do jobs for vulnerable people.

Well he could help you with the household stuff...why is that your job?

Also he could volunteer at a charity shop. They are always wanting people to help.

All men are different, so in retirement are different too.If your DH is a go-getter type then he will take ages to settle into hobbies, and relaxing.All DH's should help with household chores though, why should you still do everything?
Go places together, visit local towns or far flung places.

My husband took early retirement when redundancy was offered. I encouraged him as he was getting so stressed out at work, I didn't think he would survive to actual retirement age!
He made a to-do list and, 12 years on, it's still there and getting longer. He still does his martial arts and writes professional papers using his former area of expertise. We joined a bowls club for something we could do together although it took 5 years before we did actually play in the same team. Our son's wedding was going to be dance orientated so we started dance lessons and are still going 5 years on and socialise with friends we met there. As a youngster he was into astronomy so I bought him a telescope for his birthday and he's firmly back into that. And we are working down our bucket list of places we want to visit.
It may take a little while but you really will both wonder how he ever found time to go to work!

Strongly recommend U3A there is so much on offer and a great way of meeting new people .

*. I keep throwing out suggestions and have started a list which includes: tidy the garage, sort the study, 'redo' all the teak furniture etc etc. I'm hoping that motivates him to get out a bit! *

Honestly? I think making a list of tasks to do is simply going to make your husband view his retirement with growing dread.

My husband was a television lighting director; since his retirement he's been in great demand to light local choirs, am-dram etc. He belongs to a local model engineering club and has his own steam locomotive which he spends quite a lot of time on, which leaves me free to do lots of reading, always my great love. We look after 2 grandchildren once a week, we belong to our local U3A (we do different things though), the National Trust gives us lovely days out. We are lucky enough to have 3 theatres within reasonable reach so we can indulge our love of live performance; we walk, we talk, we garden, we spend lots of time with our friends, we can't remember how we found time to go to work. Retirement is fabulous if you approach it in the right frame of mind - hope you have many years to spend enjoying yourselves!

I took early retirement from LA at 55. I always intended to do CAB work but found that I felt quite poorly with the absorbed stress from my job coming out and making IBS worse. So....the answer for me was buying a puppy and spending time with him and training him. My husband continued working until he was 65 and a new happy chapter began when we bought our very first holiday home in our favourite place.
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What about joining a local "mens shed" or voluntary work to pass on some of his skills and expertise? That would give a change of scene and something to chat about.

My DH was also in a management position and had no hobbies but when he retired he took up a couple of hobbies (golf & music) as well as part time consultancy work. He gradualyreduced hours of pt job over 2 or 3 years and now does no paid work but is very busy with 'hobbies' including being chair of 3 comittees. So I would recommend gradual retirement!

Bbbface I think the poster was deliberately trying to come up with boring jobs for her DH to make him go out and find something more interesting to do. Its a shame there isn't an irony/sarcasm emoticon.

When you say"we" it gives the impression that you both retired at the same time. Probably some do adjust easier than others. Though to go from full time employment to full retirement seems to be a total contrast. I believe it is something that Government, Employers, Educational Establishments and the Community could assist with. By supporting, allowing and encouraging an individual to make this huge change gradually. Adjusting and adapting over time may well be a healthier, and happier way to make such an adjustment.

Best wishes to you both, I feel that it takes time for us to find what is important to us, what makes us happy etc. Trial and error can occur along the way. It is a Journy, enjoy the journey. Find new friends, hobbies, pursuits along the way.

What did your husband do before he retired? I think this will have some bearing on how he adapts to retirement. I am not enthusiastic about retiring at all and I am 68.

Is there a difference for retirees between those who were their job and those who worked. So somebody asks what do you do?
One person replies I am a doctor, the other I work in insurance or I work at John Lewis? Or are those of us who love our jobs apprehensive about retirement??