Overstaying lodger!

I'm happy to hear that your 'confrontation' with your husband turned out instead to be a conversation where you were both in agreement. Well done you for tackling the problem and well done to your husband for his response.

When I think about it the "army of virtual Grans" has a very Monty Python flavour. Hundreds or thousands of Grans in shawls and beanies streaming across the blasted heath wielding their walking sticks. Lodgers beware! ?

Phew! So pleased

Oh I've only just caught up with this thread! Great news Anniechip and so pleased it all went so easily. The old saying, anticipation is greater than realization, was certainly true in this case

Happy to hear that everything went so well.

Sorry for my rant, but would be 'home wreckers' (whether real or imagined), bring out the warrior in me. Just don't let her bamboozle you in extending that six week deadline!

Well done! Perhaps it may be an idea a couple of weeks before she’s due to leave, to start bringing in paint samples and curtain and carpet samples and make out you’re looking forward to decorating as soon as she’s gone. Just to encourage her on her way.

Of course, this may not be necessary and she could well leave before the dead line - since she was planning to go anyway (Yeah, right!)

Hi all, latest update on the lodger. (I thought I had written a message earlier but can’t have posted it!)
It’s 10 days since we gave her notice and if she has looked for anywhere she hasn’t told us!! It that had been me I would have been looking the same evening. There is no evidence of her packing up her belongings either. She is away this weekend from tomorrow till Tuesday so she won’t be looking then. I was so excited at the thought of my home being my own again and now I really want to just throw her out!! I can’t wait!! She has to be gone by Easter weekend as the following weekend my DGD is coming for her very first sleepover with us and I want it to be special. I want the room ready for her. When she returns on Tuesday I will be asking if she has found anything!

Oh yes, you must keep the momentum going now
Hopefully she has somewhere in mind. Fingers crossed for you!

I'm no sure if you mean to paint the room before your DGD comes but you could buy the paint and put the pots in her room, together with a step-ladder and cloths to cover the furniture. Then say nicely 'Sorry about all this, but I thought you'd be gone by now'

As NfK suggests, you could get some samples and then paint different colour patches on the walls and pin little bits of curtain fabric up

Go into her room with your overalls on, a step ladder, and throw a dust sheet over her as she's laying in bed.. subtle.

I would ask her straight out whether she has found somewhere else to rent and when she intends to vacate her room because you need it within the next ........... days.

Perhaps she has heard of the sometimes lengthy procedure that landlords might have to follow if they wantg a tenant to vacate the property. She may not be aware that, because you and your husband live in the same house, it is an entirely different situation and she has no legal right to stay once she has been asked to leave. Perhaps this needs to be explained to her.

I believe you can change the locks and pack up and hold her belongings for her to collect within a reasonable period of time (research this thoroughly to confirm that this is correct). Hopefully, it won't come to that and she will have the good grace to leave.

I don’t go for the hints I think when she comes back you need to be totally open with her, remind her of her ‘going ‘ date and explain she will have to sofa surf if she’s not found somewhere by your date as your family are moving in unfortunately with some folks if things slide they will just not be proactive
I hope you have her notice down in writing
I m not confident at the moment, old doubting Thomas me

Ten days isn't long. I would wait another week and then ask how her search is going. It would be better if she moved out without it being unfriendly. Good luck.

My mind just boggles at this whole situation. To me theyhis sounds like a husband with a bit on the side . Is this woman trying to make a life about doing this?
A ménage a trois.

Bet its a huge relief.... good luck and enjoy "your" new space and privacy

Well the "lodger" still there by the sound of it. I don't quite think that is yet a victory.

I would definitely speak to her when she returns - you need to keep the pressure on, otherwise she may think you are weakening and she may be hoping to persuade your husband to let her stay. Make sure your husband is with you and confirms he is waiting to decorate the room in readiness for your own family.

When she returns on Tuesday ask her (tell her) you need five minutes of her time once she has put her things away from the journey and ask where she is at on her search and let her know you are serious about the date you need her gone . Tell her you have visitors coming and you want the room redone before they arrive and the paint smells to have gone so a full week after painting is needed to clear it . Be blunt but calm .
Tell her straight ..don't drop hints !
I'm thinking she already knows who her next victim is going to be and is just waiting for the date you have given until she gathers her things together and drops them on the next ones doorstep.

I'm thinking she already knows who her next victim is going to be and is just waiting for the date you have given until she gathers her things together and drops them on the next ones doorstep.

You’ve got us all panicking now nanabilly

Just ask her, gently but persistently.
You have given her until Easter, so you have to honour that. She probably plans to stay until then, saving rent, as it is unlikely she will find anywhere cheaper or so accommodating.

I know this doesn’t sound nice but I m really concerned at how quickly the husband gave in just doesn’t fit somehow I do hope I m wrong in being a suspicious old sod

The Grans stand ready to rush to your rescue! The emergency expletives squad has been drilling in anticipation of a call to action.

I suppose from her point of view she would be mad to go before she has to because of the low rent she has been paying you. You could empty out anything of hers stored not in her room but you need to make sure she can't accuse you of taking/losing anything from her room. What is your husband saying about her seemingly not looking? I am with Bluebell on this one.

We could come in our paint-stained overalls, tins of Dulux/Crown/Farrow and Ball or whatever in hand, large brushes, getting your DH to paint the ceiling of course (that is beyond the call of duty for Gransnetters of course).