Grandaughter scared of my 2 dogs

We have a small dog that is overprotective of us. When our grandson was born last year, we made a decision to board the dog when our grandson is visiting. So, our dog goes to visit a friend and enjoys rough housing with his two dogs. Our grand son is safe and we can enjoy his visits. It just isn't worth it to me to take a chance. It is only a few times a year. When we go to our grandson's house, we get a dog sitter to come to our house. I go up frequently by myself and leave the dog with my husband. I think a dog gate is a good solution as well for short daytime visits. For a fearful child, even if your dogs are safe companions, it seems like a good compromise.

I have a dog phobia and get sick of people saying ‘it won’t hurt you’ a fear is a fear.
I’ve had hypnosis which has helped but I’ll never be a dog lover.
Some days it works better than others.
Plus the size of the dog makes a difference
Don’t force them on her or she or you’ll find she won’t come to you any more

I can’t believe all the dog haters either especially the person who brutally said get rid of the dogs. The best thing is to shut the dogs behind a baby gate so that the
Title girl can see the dogs but not have them near her. Also some people on here would do well to remember that for some elderly people their dog is their main companion and their reason for living

The child doesn’t have to like the dogs it sounds as if even her younger sibling isn’t that keen as you say he tolerates them unless they jump up at him I would imagine that’s your answer she liked them when they were small weak little puppies but now at 3 years old although small dogs they will be much more energetic and they have probably jumped up at her without you realising
She doesn’t have to like dogs or cats it’s not compulsory they are not for everyone and she doesn’t need therapy

I had a dog for my three children when they were at primary school we had her 8 years she was a very kind docile pretty little mongrel and I thought it was good for them to have pets and they all liked her but now not one of my kids have ever had any affinity to dogs or even cats and none of them have pets of their own
Some people are just not animal people it’s not to do with hate or even always fear It’s just what it is
I ve has dogs and cats over the years but I don’t want them now I have some friends who never shut up about their wonderful animals even putting birthday wishes on FB, I ask you like they can read
One poster says they can’t believe the dog haters on here that’s nonsense no one has said they hate them each to his own

My two grandchildren were terrified of dogs. My son found an extremely placid rescue dog. He explained to the RSPCA the need for a gentle dog. The dog is so laid back he can barely be bothered to wag his tail. The kids knew that he was on trial, he proved a success. They adore him and now accept other dogs that approach when they take the dog for his evening run in the park.

I think the parents have to be proactive. In the meantime, sadly, your beloved dogs need to be kept well away from your grandaughter. There is no other solution. Her irrational fear is very real to her.

So sorry it's a problem, I'm sure your dogs are delightful and you love them very much. It's hard for you.

Thank you all for your messages. A lot of different opinions. I had a dog when my daughter was at home. The only thing I can think of is that one day when my daughter was here she said to my grandaughter the dogs are fine they might nip a bit because they are puppies but it won't hurt. Other than that she he's not had any bad encounter with a dog.

athena I don’t mean to be argumentative but we don’t know the child has an irrational fear she may have been accidentally scratched or jumped at (especially as the poster speaks of the dogs jumping at the younger child)
It may be a perfectly rational fear

Whow what an angry lady! Dogs can b a big part of lots of people's lives and childrens and they help so many with disabilities and same with children. If treated kindly and with love they repay it a hundred times over and how dare u say the child is best kept away from his or her grandmother????

Who is that aimed at selsey

My message was for luckygirl

I have been afraid of dogs since a child. I am still afraid. I don't know why and can't explain it, even now.

Let your gd be your guide in this. It may be a phobia which will gradually disappear as she gets older, but if it doesn't, then you must accept her fears.

It must be very difficult being scared of something which is encountered all the time. You can’t go anywhere without seeing the dogs which are part of one in three families.
That’s like being scared of children or old women or the colour blue.
Teach the child to get over it.

I make a distinction between not liking dogs vs. being afraid of dogs.

If someone has a severe phobia of dogs, to the point where they can't go outside if someone has a dog (even on a lead), desensitization therapy would be important. Truly, I am not sure if the child is at this point yet.

If someone isn't afraid of dogs but simply doesn't care for them, that's down to personal choice. Not everyone is a dog person. That's okay. That doesn't need "fixing".

Rehome the dogs !

The child goes to the house she just doesn’t want the dogs around her sounds perfectly reasonable to me keep them in another room when she’s there

“Re-home the Dogs”
What an unhelpful, unpleasant and unnecessary comment.

Some of the most unpleasant memories from my childhood involve dogs - little nippy critters, slobbering labradors, yappy terriers of all types, flint eyed, snapping jawed sheep dogs, jumpy, springer spaniels (at least they appeared to be smiling), massive hounds putting their paws on my shoulders etc, etc. I was forced to endure these encounters but it didn't turn me into a dog lover. I'm all for respecting the feelings of everyone whatever their age.

I think you will find Selsey99 that the exclamation mark at the end of that sentence indicated an element of tongue-in-cheek.

But........... yes, I guess I do feel angry on behalf of this poor lass. Her own grandmother is on this site asking everyone what she should do about the fact that her GD is frightened of her dogs. Just about everyone - dog-lovers, dog-haters, responsible dog-owners, and non-dog-owners - have said the obvious: keep the dogs away from the child. But this child has a grandmother who cannot see this - who has not been able to work this out for herself. It is impossible not to feel sorry for the child.

Those of us who do not like dogs usually have very good reasons for that - and we also know that there are sadly dog-owners who are so absorbed in the wonder of their animals that they truly cannot get their minds round the possibility that there are entirely sane people in this world who do not share their passion, and greatly resent the underlying implication that they need to be "cured", as if this was some affliction.

This little girl needs to know that her grandmother puts her and her feelings first above those of her dogs; and she does not need to be bullied and cajoled into sharing her grandmother's passion. She needs to be respectfully accepted as she is; and the dogs need to be out of her way.

There are responsible dog-owners on this thread who actually board their dogs in order to make totally sure that their GC are safe and happy at their home - and I applaud them for this. This approach should be obvious and not require the combined advice of grans on this site.

Give this little girl a break and put her needs first - and do not try and make her feel she has got this wrong and needs sorting out - she will undoubtedly have food reasons for her feelings. Just hearing the news will have exposed her to an awareness of the very real possibility of harm.

I acknowledge and respect that some people love their dogs and they fulfil an important role in their lives; but, like this little girl, I do not want the dogs anywhere near me; nor do I wish to be told that "He is just being friendly" whilst he is jumping up, scratching my legs and dripping slobber all over me - no thank you!

good reasons - not food reasons!!!

Not an unpleasant comment Iam64 it's a valid option.

I actually think that the more you avoid something you fear, the more likely it is to turn into a phobia. I think if she is happy to poke sweets into their cage, it sounds like they are a bit too boisterous for her. I would let her continue to let them have treats in their cage and if they have to come out of their cage for any reason, they should be on a short leash so she realises that they cannot jump up at her. I would take anything else at her pace and not push it.
The only reason I think it is necessary to desensitise her if possible is because it is miserable to have an ingrained phobia about something. I dread this time of year with the spiders coming indoors and I wish that when I was younger, I had been gently desensitised rather than having huge ones thrown at me. Any visit to a park or a walk along the road will bring this little lass into contact with dogs. Being very afraid, screaming and waving her arms about is more likely to get her bitten than learning to quietly avoid an unwanted dog.
My GD was terrified by our large but gentle dog until she stayed the weekend with us. Although he was made to stay in his bed, she learned to pass him without visible fear by the time she left. She still doesn't like him much but at least she's not kicking up a shindig every time he dares to lift his head up.

Water meadow - I agree. This child is going to b on the same planet as dogs and other animals for the rest of her life if she does not get over this fear this is something she will take into adulthood and which will really Complicate life for her. Animals especially dogs can help children to learn to respect and care for our animal life we do not have sole rights to this planet maybe we could learn from them as we r making a complete mess of looking after it! Maybe the child's parents can help their child by taking someone's old dog for walks etc etc slowly slowly this can b overcome with patience and care. It saddens me to see the negative remarks on here we shld bring our children up to respect and care for the animal world, but by the majority of the remarks on here I can't see that happening.

Selsey99 I am really greatful for your kind comments. I take on board the positive comments and leave the rest.

Agnurse had a great idea re/ using desensitization therapy. For those of you balking at the word "therapy", in this case it only means taking incremental steps to help someone understand and perhaps overcome their fear of something. Don't we all want that? For example, I'm afraid of flying. My son is in Mississippi just diagnosed with terminal cancer. Therefore, it behooves me to do something about my fear of flying.

In the OP's case, she has taken steps to separate her GD from the pups, wants to help her GD with her fear, and perhaps give her a positive experience with "man's best friend" down the road. I hardly think that MooMOO is advocating that her GD be forced to be with the dogs. Agnurse's suggestions are practical and thoughtful. Oopsminty's story about helping a child overcome her fear and then being thanked by that grownup child years later is a positive outcome of this suggestion.

Also liked Iam64's comments that she has her dogs remain behind a gate in the home, separating dogs and little ones to keep both canine and human members of the household safe.

MooMoo why are you looking for a reason for your GD’s dislike / fear of your dogs ? We all have different likes and dislikes in every aspect of life . Just because you like them it doesn’t mean that she has to .
We are all different and should respect that surely and make adjustments if necessary.