When sexism and ageism combine...

Crispee ?

Chestnut

I would be a bit miffed if someone said 'mind the old lady'.

I was really upset when someone said that about me to a child. I know I use a stick and had a face covering on but I am only 56!

I really don’t think I can be bothered to upset. There are more important things to be distressed by - life is too short to be fussy about what you’re called as long as it’s not downright rude!

I would be happy to get a wolf whistle at 76. ?

Granartisan

A young acquaintance told me I was 'doing well' to be using a computer at 'my age'.

i think i'd be tempted to reply that he/she was doing well to be able to handle a fork and knife all by themselves. how clever !

Sometimes, a shop assistant or office clerk will want to suggest me doing something online.
They often start off by saying "Do you have internet, at all?"
I actually don't mind that, as many people of my age don't have internet, or do have it but can barely use it.
I just assure them cheerfully that I'll have no bother doing whatever it is.

I can tell if someone is being friendly, or patronising, whether they use Madam, Love or any other form of address, and will react accordingly. The actual word used doesn’t bother me at all. I did notice, when I was briefly using a wheelchair, that many shop assistants ignored me and spoke to my ‘pusher’as though my brain had stopped working, along with my legs.

In my local hospital, unlike some that have been mentioned, the staff always ask if they may use your Christian name. In-patients have a note of how they wish to be addressed written over their beds. It’s a good respectful system.

My husband experiences this when he goes to our local co op. If he's wearing a suit he's called Sir but if he's in jeans and a t.shirt he's called Mate.
I don't really mind what people call me in shops but I do hate Hon or Honey.

FarNorth

Oldwoman70 is it only the odd-job man you call 'young man' while you remember the names of all your other staff?
If so, he might be secretly peeved.

Just come back to this thread so sorry for the late reply.
I don't have "staff" - just the odd job man and the gardener and yes I call him "young man" too (but in his case as he is in his 20s as far as I am concerned it is accurate) The odd job man has become a friend and would not hesitate to let me know if he didn't like me calling him that

If I saw a sign saying take an old bag shopping. I would now it meant to use an old bag. Why would anyone take offence at that. People have become so sensitive to innocent comments. We are breeding a generation who take offence at the slightest thing. Life has become so easy people need to find something to moan about.

They would have something to moan about if they didn't have all the labour saving devices and all the tech.

Unless someone calls me a rude word I really don't care. It's nice just to talk to people.

Its not about being offended.

?‍♀‍

Yes it is. If people weren't offended by what others say then there wouldn't be trouble.

Victim blaming.

But thanks for explaining what I think Aveline. I'll just keep quiet now so as not to cause any trouble.

I do not like to be called "madam" and the last time I was my reply was that I did not run a brothel.

When I'm asked how I'd prefer to be addressed I always say Madam and nobody ever takes me at my word .
As ever, it ain't what you say it's the way that you say it!

Hello, I really dont mind any of these expressions of kindness or even affection for the elderly woman. I dont want to be sir. What I really object to is not being seen at all and people making decisions for me. Like Jean can look after the children, Jean will wash up and tidy up, Jean can do this or that. It make you look like a mean person when you dont want to do these things and why should my children assume that I do. Also would like women to feel they can enjoy each other as women and be good company without the assumption that your are gossiping. The labels that are put on you when you get older is really dehumanising. Older women need to find an identity that fits and makes them feel they have a place in society, respected and even loved as being old brings so many gifts. Being called darling, love, sweetheart are generally traditionally kind and I even like it sometimes.

I'm 62, and don't mind being addressed as "love", "dear" etc. When I'm out with others, I don't like being addressed as "guys", nor do I like "girls"