Help calm me. House buying and selling stress *Part 9*

Razz how hard you have worked! Let’s hope that the only way is up now.

Thanks midgey, I feel as though I've been circuit training with a brutal trainer! My knuckle is swollen where I was leaning on the floor whilst brushing, I've skinned my toe badly and my bum still aches.

Having a bit of a rest before I start painting the walls, I'm going to use a roller on a stick. I'm not touching the ceiling or the woodwork, I'll get someone in to do that. I never want to see a brush again! PS thanks for the flowers, I'd missed some posts.

I do hope you are all ok, it is lovely to read about your day to day lives, the ups as well as the downs and also to get that perspective from you spice, on the other side of this small world

Oh I have been so stressed for two days, starting with the `scam` then yesterday finding out that the dealership in the next town, I had an appointment tomorrow to fit my new sat nav/radio head. Someone there had clicked the wrong button and made my appointment from where I thought that scam came from, many miles from here. Good job I rang up to check yesterday. It seems that dealerships are not that good wrt after sales service. No-one seems to care

So I have another appointment in 4 weeks. I am determined not to hand any money over until I have checked that everything is working correctly, the sensors and the multi function display that I have come to rely on, that they have interfaced correctly. Once they have money then the hands are washed

Also ds has a hugely important job interview this morning, he has studied so hard and they like him a lot but it is out of his field, he would be bringing a hugely broad IT experience with him as well as the ability to gell with people. Same company as now. Bottom of that pay scale but that would give him a better future, with lovely people as well as aspiration. The dept he is in now has been told that project management will be gone everywhere in five years and he is now top of his pay scale with a tremendously horrible bullying female boss. He is such a lovely helpful and hard working person

So suddenly I went from top of the world feeling to yukky with an expanded buzzing head. Really, doing general house and garden maintenance is such a good de-stressor compared to stuff out of one`s control. I will never complain about maintenance that I can do myself

Razz it makes me think about you, that floor was out of your control hence terribly stressful, now the painting is within your control. I hope you are seeing each pass with that roller as a bit of release of what you have been through

Yogi you de-stressed by being practical in the garden and Franbern, you de-stressed by being tenacious about getting the right people in and by pottering

I hate the way that stress can suddenly jump into our lives and affect our well-being. This is also what is happening now to most ordinary people wrt the cost of living, very much hyped by the media and now getting into their lives so that many cannot sleep for worry

Karma hope our son gets good news re his job. My daughter who lives close by announced at the weekend that she was leaving her school job and going to work in the council offices for education. She never mentioned a word about even applying for different job, or of leaving the school, waited to tell me when it was all settled. Although it will mean an easier life, less stress, and more money, it does mean that she will not be off for ALL school holidays.

Seems to be the time (for me) of things not working properly), so, my scooter has been behaving badly every so often for the last few days. It would seem fine, then suddenly would nearly lose its power and crawl along at about one mph. So, today, I popped it into the mobility shop which is opposite the library - and left it there whilst I did my volunteer stint this afternoon. Mechanic in that shop is one of these supermen with scooters and the like. When I went to collect it, he says it should be okay now, he did various things, says it was a little mysterious, but thinks it may be due to lots of dust having got around the battery. Tomorrow I take delivery of my new power chair. (He did say that perhaps it having company in my garage might make the scooter feel a little better).

It is still warm summer weather down here, pleasant temperatures. At night I am just needing a single sheet and have the windows all open. However, the evenings are drawing in - last night I attended a meal and discussion group with my daughter early evening and she dropped me back home soon after 8 pm, and it was definitely getting dark then.

Razz have you got your tv up and running yet? And all your furni ture is now back in its proper place. Bet you had a great nights sleep in your proper bed last night.

Spice My s.i.l had a crested Cockatoo. He is an entertainer and was teaching this bird to cycle and other things, but the bird didn't seem happy and started pulling out his tail feathers, so my s.i.l had to re home him sadly.

Best of luck to your son Karmalady fingers crossed for him.

Good luck to your D too Fran on her new job. How thoughtful of you to get your scooter a companion

You've worked so hard for so long Razz so do get as many jobs done by others now. Yes do let us know if you slept in your own comfy bed last night and got your TV up and running.

Morning all, a very sad me today as I lost my beautiful 17 year old cat yesterday, it was kidney disease. She's kept the mice at bay and been a cuddly companion for all these years.

I had the option of admitting her to go onto a drip for a few days, which might have given her an additional week or perhaps longer, but no guarantees, I declined. I had half expected it but the reality is brutal, and felt very upset all day. I didn't do anything yesterday, just found photos of her for the kids, and buried her in the garden. I know it was the kindest thing to do as she was not eating and could have gone off to die somewhere. So glad I didn't put her into kennels while the work was being done. Even though we were camped in the kitchen she still had her routine, and slept on the blow up bed with me. RIP Pandora, my beautiful and last ever cat.

As I was so long I missed the curtain lady, who couldn't wait, she's coming this morning. I will pull myself together and buy the paint tomorrow, still feel like I've been hit by a bus though.

On a happier note I hope your son got the job karmalady, and good luck to your daughter Franbern.

Upwards and onwards!

Razz I am sorry about Pandora. You will feel upset she was part of your family for a long time. And has gotten you through some tough times. You did the kindest thing for her letting her die as hard as it was to make that decision. Same as your dog he is part of your family. Doesn't matter if they aren't human pets are family and give you a reason to keep going no matter what else is going on your life. ?

Sorry to hear about your cat, it is so sad when a much loved pet dies.

I have just joined Gransnet, after being a long time stalker.
Razzamatazz, I have followed your journey from the beginning. You have shown such resilience coping with all the rubbish that life has thrown at you. I hope that you feel really proud of yourself.
Now, just as everything seems to falling into place your much loved Pandora has left you. I am heartbroken for you.
Take some time out, try and rest. I wish that I could come and give you a hug.

Thanks friends, still feeling weepy today and my dog keeps going to her meal mat and sitting there.

Curtain lady has just been, they are about an inch off the floor. I really am past caring!

Razz so sorry to hear about your Cat. I know you were expecting it, but not something we can really prepare ourselves for. Will leave a gap in your life.

One inch off the floor sounds about right for curtains, You do not want them dragging along on the floor.

My new wheelchair has now been delivered, but as it is drizzly out today, cannot take it out for a ride. Do need to get used to taking this on buses, when I feel brave enough. On trains I will fold it down (about the size of a large suitcase), so I can sit in a normal seat for those journeys. When I get used it should give me even more freedom to get around

Sadly, one of the people living in these flats was found by police last night having past away. Her nephew was contacted by them late last night, after they broke down the front door.

Death is very much a part of life

Razz, hugs, it is sad to see a much loved pet slip away. She had a long life with a good parent

I am in tune with that last sentence of yours Franbern, Hard to say it to people but life is finite. Very much part of my philosophy

It was a quiet day today and most was spent just quietly knitting some socks while sitting outside and being aware of sounds around me. Birds mainly, sometimes a train and two helicopters. When the sun came out then the water fountain tinkled and being windy today, there was a lot of leaf rustling. No radio, no talking to anyone but I am one of those who is comfortable in my silence. Today I stayed away from internet and phone too. It is probably equivalent to re-setting myself

Razz
Very sorry to about your beautiful much loved cat pandora.

Oh no Razz I am so very sorry for the loss of your dear cat Pandora, good job you kept her with you and I think you did the best thing re no drip. My little Westie was 15.5yrs, they took her in for 24hrs and then phoned me saying she is so unhappy here. I went to get her and she passed away, in great pain from pancreatitis, the next day. My vet was a 24hr, but just that week changed to closing at 11pm when my little dog needed pain relief during the night. The utter pain when she went was that of a mother losing her child, as she was my baby.

It will take a while to come to terms with your loss Razz May Pandora R.I.P for you both. xx

{{{HUGS}}} for you Razz

Thank you all for your comforting words but I've had a 'perspective' moment tonight.

My daughter is in LA and has just messaged me to ask if knew anything about my friend's husband as she'd seen his son's Instagram - and sadly it is true, his Dad has just died at the age of 56.

We must all enjoy every day mustn't we.

Just back from taking the care package around to my newly widowed friend, she' s very calm and being very practical. It's really unsettled me thinking back on what she has to face, at least she hasn't got to go through probate as they had joint accounts. I told her I'll see for a cup of tea in a month or so, give her time to regroup. I intend inviting her places on Sunday, the longest day of the week when you are alone.

Strange how having experienced a death I've become obsessed with pensions/wills/IHT and care home fees, my mindset has become bizarre.

I was worried recently to see a fellow widow being taken to court by her late husband's ex, under the 1975 Inheritance and Dependants Act. Apparently the claim has to be made within six months of probate/letters of intent being issued.

I need to lighten up!

It isn`t an obsession re care, wills etc, more it is a reality check, the one that goes deep into the psyche and takes over the mind. Eg how will we manage when older and unable to do much, many oldies end up sitting by a one bar fire in a cold room with a rug on their knees, just waiting for the inevitable.

Most here want to be up and doing, out and about and enjoying life. We want to have the loose ends neat and tidy for our children and as much as possible, to enable good care if needed, either at home or in a home. It is very important to forward plan right now and only then will our minds be at rest, when we have done the best we can. Too many don`t get `obsessed` but procrastinate and then end up wherever the powers that be want to put us. Being `obsessive` now gives us that all important choice, as much as is possible within our own circumstances

Superb talk today, about fraud having overtaken burglery. 42% of reported crimes are fraud and 65% is expected in two years. Most is via the telephone and speaking to someone who sounds nice and starts to build a relationship. Scary but very informative. Never use debit card, they immediately have access to your bank account. Online sites that look real, when all the fraudsters have done is change eg an a that looks a bit different and very hard to spot. CC is best also PP. I am never paying via debit card again, not anywhere. I did like to, to better able to keep track of my money, trusted places but they can be spoofed

Sorry karmalady, apologies, I can tell I've annoyed you. I wasn't thinking clearly and used the wrong word. I should have said focussed. As you rightly point out, it is the reality of our situation. After my scare about my husband's ex, I double checked my paperwork, it is all in order for the kids

Thanks for the tip about not using the debit card. My daughter hasn't got a CC yet, her friend has agreed to use hers in the US and she is going to repay her.

oh no razz, never annoyed me at all. I have been having similar thoughts about being focused on my future. It is a good thing for us to have things in order, as much as possible.

I had a lovely day yesterday, met some new people too.

we have 4 full time fraud officers in avon and somerset police, devon and dorset have none. That was reassuring for us here. Something else that hit home re fraud was about cc and the transaction is between me and cc company, from thence the cc co is responsible. That was so helpful to know

I have two credit cards, one for 2k and the new one via john lewis for 5k, which is much more than I need but useful I suppose, for a big purchase. Today I will make sure that the relevant telephone numbers are copied from the back of the CCs and written into my housebook. He said that if you get that doubt after a phone call, then to ring that number and block the card

He also said to very much trust your gut instinct, which is what I did re that potential scam last week when I blocked that number

This the important police-linked action fraud site with lots of information
www.actionfraud.police.uk/

son in banking IT said that they have a faud update meeting every month

Killing a little time right now, pondering this and that while waiting to go on a cycle ride on my e bike as it is a beautiful day and I want to do the lanes and orchards near by, a longer ride

Razz sorry to hear your friends H has passed away, she is most likely in shock and just going through the motions.
It's normal when you have had 2 bereavements together, to think about 'things'. I remember when my dad died unexpectedly, I watched programmes on TV about funerals & death, which normally I would have avoided.

I believe I told you about getting pet meds online a lot cheaper than at the vets, I've just realised, I think I told you the name wrong, I believe I said it was Medivet, but it's Animed.

Enjoy your ride Karmalady If I don't recognize a number I don't answer the phone & block, job done, if I do answer and get the usual garbage from the fraudsters, within a few words I know it's a scam, so again delete call and block.

There really are some people out there who cannot use the internet, one said she was terrified. How on earth will they cope when there are no banks anywhere and when all are currency is crypto. We still have a bank so they have somewhere with a person, to get cash

My ride was utterly glorious, love this sort of day. Tomorrow I plan to go on a car ride to a lovely little historic town, just for a potter around. I feel as though I still want to keep weekends a bit special and the weekend can just disappear