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Legal, pensions and money

My son's wife says she wants a divorce

(36 Posts)
specki4eyes Mon 21-May-12 20:24:01

I suspect there are some 'legal eagle' Grannies out there who might give me some clue as to where my son stands. Brief resume: He and his wife have been married 9 years, have two children 7 and 4. She earns the most money and works full time; he is a self employed painter/decorator which enables him to be the primary carer for the children, but this therefore restricts his earning power. Their lifestyle depends very much on her earnings. She has now fallen out of love with him and wants him to move out of the matrimonial home but to continue taking most of the responsibility for the children. He is devastated and can't bear the thought of losing his children. His children adore him.
She is going out clubbing and partying with girlfriends most weekends, he babysits. She says he does not support her - this is not the case. Quite the reverse - he does most things from cooking and tidying to gardening and childcare. Her parents are regularly called upon to childmind during school holidays.
Where does he stand legally?

specki4eyes Wed 01-May-13 15:09:54

Jeanie all those approaches have been tried and failed because she is absolutely the controller of all this..she has even tried to change history by saying that he HASN'T taken care of the children - all lies. He has character references from the school and the nursery to prove that. But never in a million years would she move out - it is HER home, they are HER children, the money accrued thanks in part to him enabling her to earn it is all HERS. He is unable to get legal aid because he came to the marriage with a house, which she has COMMANDEERED as half hers - it is now sold but she won't let him realise the equity. He has slept on a sofa bed in the playroom for nearly a year - only using the rest of the facilities in the house like washer, cooker, bathroom when she is out. It is utterly monstrous but what can he do - he just refused to leave his children. But he can't go to court again because last time it cost nearly £2,000 including barrister and solicitor fees. And that not counting the £9,000 already paid to get to that stage! The law is an ass now regarding divorce..legal aid calculations should be based on your net income only and most solicitors believe this too. Blame stupid successive governments. If she was ordered to pay maintenance to him, she would deliberately make herself unemployed.

WilliamMartin Wed 19-Jun-13 07:42:49

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Mariawellington Mon 09-Dec-13 15:54:38

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annodomini Mon 09-Dec-13 16:09:37

Reported as spam.

newist Mon 09-Dec-13 16:09:40

You are reported Maria

taharaplin3 Mon 16-Feb-15 03:36:31

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kittylester Mon 16-Feb-15 07:26:57

And again!

Grannyknot Mon 16-Feb-15 09:34:14

It's often the dormant threads - that's usually a clue. BFN, spammers!

richardjohnson Mon 04-May-15 14:04:01

Consult an attorney before she has the opportunity to file for a divorce. You need an attorney who will file a petition for custody and an access order. Doing this will mean you filing for divorce but, it will always mean you protecting your legal rights as a father.

NotTooOld Tue 05-May-15 12:06:57

Just a tip from pragmatic old me - when your son gets his first meeting with a solicitor (and I agree, that should be sooner rather than later) get him to sit down the night before and write a list of things he wants to know. No solicitor will mind him referring to his list. Your son should also jot down the answers as the meeting progresses. In an emotional state it is all too easy to miss the important stuff or get it wrong.