Scared to spend on myself

I also switched to a Santander 123 account this year. It pays varying amounts of interest (monthly)depending on the balance but you get 3% on balances between £3,000 & £20,000 You need to have a minimum of £500 paid into the account every month and pay a least 2 direct debits out of it. There are small cash back payments on some bills too. I thought it sounded too good to be true at first but the account has been around for 2 or 3 years so is tried and tested and its worked very well for me

When I was coming up to retirement I did a spreadsheet with all my expenditure for a year. Noting down balances off bank and credit card statements etc. It did help me get a better idea of my income vs annual expenditure.

I am fortunate in that I benefitted from very frugal parents mum in particular who was always very worried about spending money. My dad was a teacher in the 50s/60s/70s so never particularly well paid but they had enough to get by and leave a bit to us two daughters and four grand children. Particularly after down sizing and moving North.

We do generally manage but sometimes have to dig into savings for household repairs and replacements. We could if needed downsize our house.
I think radicalnan has a good point. Get out and treat yourself when you can.
We have always tended to live quite economically anyway. It was deeply ingrained in both myself and OH by our parents.

My oh is still working but is off atm after a spell of illness (12 weeks). We go off to places such as garden centres and visit nearby towns a couple of times a week ( up to 4 times). He always wants a coffee shop visit and sometimes twice. We realised 2 cappuccino s plus a slice of something ( him again ?? ) soon adds up. Last month it was £150 ! . It's not so much the bills it's the odd £5 - 10 spends that can quickly mount up.

my Dad wont spend anything on himself and i would rather he did than leave anything for the family.You don't have to be wasteful.Treat your self now and then.

I'm with you there Angela1961, we noticed the same thing and are cutting back. Our answer was to have an amount in cash at the beginning of a ninth and when it's gone it's gone. First couple of months caused a degree of grumpiness but it's settled and works a treat now. Our other problem, so far not solved, is that as we live at the coast people want to come and stay. It costs us a fortune! We don't want to stop people coming, love to see them, just not spend so much. Any ideas?

CORNERGRAN....Check around for the average b&b charge in your area and tell them what it is. Then tell them they can have a family discount but from now on you just cant afford for them to stay without some contribution. I suggest you send them a friendly letter. Good Luck !

like others, I find a daily record of spending very reassuring, and santander bank reviewer's jaw hit the floor when I produced it recently. simply, I have 4 columns - essential (eg. house repairs, dentist, car ) ; monthly direct debits to cover everything I can think of ; daily food +petrol + household stuff ; and optional i.e anything I could cut back in emergency. tot up money in /money out each month, so am always aware of general situation - I find this is very comforting.

By George there are some good money managers among us GNers! We could all learn a thing or two from some of these posts I reckon. One of us surely ought to be in line for the next Chancellor.

That's assuming they don't just keep Osborne.

I enjoyed holidays,etc whilst I could. When my savings got below £10000 I found I could get Pension credit which has other benefits such as no Council tax, dental fees, etc. Since I am disabled with os teoarthritis I get lower Attendance allowance which also led to an increase in Pension Credit. I live quite comfortably and am able to pay for help with housework and gardening. I am not ashamed to get these benefits considering I gave five years during the war to the WAAF, have always paid my taxes and never been in debt all my life. My late husband did say I was economical to the point of meanness.

sorry if I sounded a bit smug in previous post - I guess financial control = peace of mind , for me. should confess that 'optional' column is AKA 'fun', and usually has the highest monthly total spend !

I am naturally frugal having been born towards the end of the war. I cannot bring myself to shop in expensive supermarkets like Waitrose or stores like John Lewis but enjoy getting bargains in the sales!
My husband and I did enjoy good holidays however and would not penny pinch om meals out etc. Unfortunately he is now in a Nursing Home and I am having to pay for his care out of his savings. (he does get Attendance Allowance and Nursing Care contribution).This makes me even more careful with my money so i totally understand Nanna M.

I too had to retire early on health grounds and now only have a third of my previous salary to live on. I will not get my state pension for another 6 yrs, so it has been a culture shock, as I had a good salary and quite a comfortable life.
However, I am actually enjoying finding ways to economise. Now that I am retired, I need little petrol, I don't have to go to expensive work functions and I don't have to buy work clothes, so saving money already. I enjoy looking for bargains in supermarket and pound shops and tailor meals to use what is on offer. We still eat very well. My husband used to do the shopping when I was working, as he was retired. I am ashamed that we used to waste so much food, as I didn't keep an eye on dates in fridge. Also I save points with reward cards, shop on ebay, and do online surveys which earn me points for well known high street stores. I recently won an £80 blouse on ebay and it cost me nothing with reward points converted to ebay vouchers. I have grown lots of salad and veggies from 29p packets of seeds. It also keeps me busy, as I was very low at being forced into retirement at 60, due to my health issues. My husband and I still treat ourselves, but are not wasteful. We have worked hard all our lives, after years of having very little money to bring up our children, we want some fun before my health deteriorates further. I love the challenge and buzz when I get a bargain. Retirement and reduced income have not been as bad as I anticipated.

Yes Cornergran we have the same problem as we live in Cumbria and only about a 20 drive from Buttermere and the cells so always have people (willing ? ! ) to visit so that adds up the monthly budget. Also living fairly remote it's a fair old heave- ho if we need/go places. I've been on a 10 week / 2 hour a session crochet course which is over a 60 mile round trip. Also if we want a decent sized supermarket that is the same.

Oops mean fells not cells !

Until now, I hadn't realised how lucky I am to be living. near so many supermarkets and discount stores. It does make economising so much easier than for some fellow gransnets.
I am new to this forum, as just after I retired, my darling granddaughter was born after eleven and a half years of trying and I discovered the site. I don't post much, but thoroughly enjoy reading all the posts.

For those of you that have separate Santander 123 a/c, don't forget you can have a joint a/c as well. So you have 3 a/c going.

A 3 bedroom house gas and elecricity £34 a month? Surely not! (*Charleygirl*)

4 bed here. £83 a month. And we don't go mad with the heating.

where are we going wrong with our fuel bills?
Time to change

Sararose
we have Waitrose cards and find if we shop very carefully it is fairly reasonable; I always end up buying more in Tesco or Sainsburys because of all their offers which we don't really need.
JL is good for electrical goods and there is usually an extended warranty. However, I rarely buy clothes there.

Our dual fuel bill is £85 a month. 3 bedrooms and a converted basement to heat, so I didn't think that was bad. It's a lot lower since we moved from BG. £34 a month is extremely low, surely? Perhaps I need some energy saving advice!

What you really know need to know to decide whether you can afford to indulge yourself now and again is not what your income is but what your disposable income consists of. In order to be on top of this keep accounts (W.H. Smith sell an accounts' book or you could run a laptop spreadsheet). Write in all of your income and all of your outgoings. If you add all the up and coming weekly, monthly and annual debits ahead of time - divide the annual sums by weeks and months if need be - what you have left is your residue and you can spend it.

You will need an emergency fund to fall back on so don't spend all your savings.

I would also ensure you are on the best utilities and phone tariffs by shopping around and shifting your provider if need be. This has now been made very easy to do and the new provider will do all of the work for you. This might free up some cash to splurge! Sign up to some supermarket comparison sites and shop around for bargains. You could bulk buy your preferred non perishable brands when they are on offer which will save a lot over time.

If you have savings of up to £20,000 the Santander 123 current account pays a market beating 3per cent on them and you get cash back for running your direct debits though it too.

Charity shops sell books, CDs and DVDs very cheaply and you can use your local library for free.

Also, if you are running an account book, open a page in the back for treats and holidays and save up for them. For example, put an amount a month away for a trip away and then take it guilt free.

You can live frugally but have fun too.

Lilyflower,
I found your post really helpful! I've always tried to track my (limited) finances, but never really got them organised properly so will try this spreadsheet thingy! Thanks!?

How much to keep in an emergency fund though????

Since I retired, I keep one small notebook, in it I allow £100.00 two weeks food and small daily expenses. I keep another one, in which I put £160.00 per month for larger expenses. Gas, electricity, tv and any larger outlays. After a few months, I usually find I have a surplus. Which goes back into my bank account. If there's a surplus in the smaller book, I just carry it forward. This way, I know where my money is going, and it works for me.

I think we all worry about the future no matter what our circumstances are, it is only natural. I worry about how I can afford it if I need care later on. I think you have to try to balance things out if I have to spend more than usual I try to economise after and I think at least I can still look after myself at the moment.