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Wills and disinherited children

(49 Posts)
Rosie21 Thu 14-Jul-16 13:29:26

My elderly widowed mother wants to change her will. She has been to two solicitors and they have both said she can't leave various amounts of monies/percentages to each child. Three of the children she hasn't had anything to do with, and they haven't wished to communicate with her (its a long story) So she wants to leave the three of them with a token monetary amount and the bulk to the two children who have been supportive and most devoted.
The solicitors say she has to leave all five children equal amounts.
Any bright ideas or explanations as to why she can't.

M0nica Sat 08-Oct-16 00:23:47

A good solicitor will ask for one if they have any doubts on this issue.

My uncle was sectioned for a month with severe depression. He made his will a year later when he was completely recovered, but the solicitor asked about his mental health and then asked for a certificate from a doctor or psychiatrist. It meant had there been any questions asked later, they had the evidence that he was in sound mind when the will was made.

Coolgran65 Fri 07-Oct-16 23:29:26

In case of any doubt about the mindset of the writer of a Will it is possible to get a doctor/ GP certificate report to confirm that the writer is of sound mind. It doesn't cost a lot.

GrandmaMoira Fri 07-Oct-16 20:58:48

I believe other European countries have similar laws to France. I'm so glad we don't have it here. I'm a widow and it was a second marriage for both of us. When we met I had a house and he had nothing and moved into my house. I later inherited from my father. I always worked but my husband wasn't always fit enough to work. Therefore I consider the "estate" to be all mine and my children's. I would think it grossly unfair if I had to sell my home to give money to my step-children, especially as they don't talk to me now anyway.

M0nica Fri 07-Oct-16 18:41:14

Yes, we have done our will in percentages. We have seen several cases where wills were made with lump sums left to individuals and what was a large share of the estate when the will was made, was a very small amount when the testator finally died.

An old house near my parent was reduced to total dereliction because someone left a house to be divided between his children and much younger wife. The amount the wife got was given as a lump sum and by the time her husband died instead of being half the value of the house it was less than 10%. She refused to sell the house (which was a holiday home) and the children were stuck. The wife lived on for nearly another 30 years during which time nothing was done to the house and it gradually became more and more derelict. When she did die the house had to be demolished and the plot sold for land value only.

aggie Fri 07-Oct-16 16:19:52

Our Solicitor said we could name sums /articles to leave to this one or that one , but if there was nothing there , or not enough to fulfill this at the end it would not work , he said to leave things as percentages , or split evenly

M0nica Fri 07-Oct-16 16:04:10

No they cannot, they have to show that they were dependent on the deceased in some way or had done something, like work on a farm for low pay, because they had been told they would inherit it, to have any claim on the estate.

Just being left nothing or very little in a will, is not sufficient legal justification for contesting it. if they do they will not win. There have been several cases recently where such claims have been thrown out.

Viv12345 Fri 07-Oct-16 11:42:33

sorry should read write a letter to state why they have not included
These children and that it is not there wish that they receive any
Thing

Viv12345 Fri 07-Oct-16 11:40:39

The problem is that children that are left nothing or very little
Can contest the will.
and can be awarded an amount of money regardless of what
Is stated in the will
Just been through this myself.
The person who is leaving the money must write a letter so that
It can be presented in court to say why they have included these
Children in the will so it's easy really.

Gemmag Tue 02-Aug-16 15:54:14

The best way of dealing with this kind of situation is to place the residuary estate in a discretionary will trust with a letter of wishes directing the trustees (who should be professional trustees rather than a sibling to avoid rows between children).

Conni7 Tue 02-Aug-16 15:17:46

Is she French? I know that French law says that an estate must be divided equally amongst the children. Don't think it applies in England.

mumofmadboys Mon 01-Aug-16 11:50:53

That is so good Juggernaut that the sisters made it fair. I couldn't countenance leaving my estate unequally because it causes such hurt. Even if children have behaved differently towards you I think to leave money equally is a gracious thing to do.

Juggernaut Mon 01-Aug-16 11:28:55

My grandmother had four children, but for a reason none of us can fathom, she left everything equally between her three daughters and nothing to her son. There'd been no arguments, no problems, she was just a woman who could be very nasty when the mood took her.
My mum was the executor of the will, and between her and her sisters they decided to split the assets four ways, not three, and thereby include their brother. One of the sisters had a little moan about it, but as everyone knows that she's mean and money-grabbing, it was explained in no uncertain terms that she was going to share with her brother!
The brother died two years after their mum, thankfully without ever finding out that his mum had been so horrible to him in her will!

spabbygirl Mon 01-Aug-16 11:09:40

Thanks for your kindness Granjura, I did speak to a solicitor at the time, but its proving it which is so difficult.

It does really hurt when one child gets more than the other, I've never got over the hurt from my uncle's will, its like he suddenly divorced me for no reason or change of behaviour on my part.

I like the french way. Often when people are old and poorly even though not diagnosed with dementia they can get very confused. My mum is like that, she has just asked me why my grandson is not at school, despite the fact that its august 1st. Its too easy to sway these people's opinions

Floradora9 Sat 30-Jul-16 18:49:57

In Scotland any child can claim a share of thier parents movable estate whether excluded in a will or not. Even if you parents were not married and your father did not contribute to tor upbringing you can claim agaist his estate if he is named on your birth certificate or you can prove paternity.

granjura Sat 30-Jul-16 14:15:29

spabbygirl, I am sure both laws are open to abuse and manipulation, sadly.

But in cases where one sibbling has been so awful to parents- I think they should ahve the choice. In France that option does not exist at all. All sibblings get their share- whatever their circumstances and behaviour towards the parents- and the remaining spouse may have to sell the home to give them their share.

nanajennie Sat 30-Jul-16 13:14:44

My mother used to do the Hokey Cokey with her will . . You are in ... You are out, in, out, in out and shake it in my face . . .eventually she left the bulk to my daughter, token amounts to me and siblings, rest between other grandchildren. I was not hurt as had become immune to her attempts to manipulate and divide long before her death.

Emelle Sat 30-Jul-16 12:23:15

My mother left the greater part of her estate to one of my brothers and much less to me and my other brother, claiming he did more for her. She totally air brushed everything we did including many call outs in the middle of the night. The fact is, he was always her favourite and she would have done this even if we had looked after her 24/7. Having just been at the receiving end of this type of will I can't start to describe how much it hurts, even as an adult, wife, mother and granny, as it confirms, what I always knew - just how little she thought of me. Suffice to say my memories of her are not good. It is not something to do lightly.

spabbygirl Fri 29-Jul-16 21:15:04

Granjura I know the principle of choosing who inherits sounds fine, but you get unscrupulous carers deliberately misleading the wealthy for their own ends. My uncle had control of a family business he promised his family donor he would leave to a Paroe. But shortly before he died he was very ill with osteoporosis & profoundly deaf so we used to make visiting arrangements via the carer (he lived in scotland, we're in south england). Carer always discouraged our visits, stanley was to deaf to speak on the phone so we just went up there. Carer insisted on being in the room & said he was too tired to speak long. We weren't invited to stay as we usually had been since childhood. When he died we discovered he'd sold the business for £440k and given the money & gifts to people in paisley, houston & district. It really hurt just as a divorce would.

GrannyRose Fri 29-Jul-16 20:05:40

Gononsuch, I understand that in England Power of Attorney ceases when the person who has delegated it dies. That's when the Will and Probate take over, and Executors have work to do.

Newquay Fri 29-Jul-16 17:40:11

DH's mother left everything to youngest (of 6) daughter with no explanation. It hurt the other children a lot especially one who has always suffered financially. It confirmed what everyone suspected that this D was favoured.
DH and I are leaving everything to be split equally between our two DDs even though one is so much more wealthy. In conversations we hope to be able to persuade wealthy DD to be generous at the time.

Granny2016 Fri 29-Jul-16 17:24:09

I am next of kin to my brother who is financially very comfortable,my own needs are fairly simple,considered basic by some.
I have asked him to leave nothing to me but equally between my daughters.It will make far more difference to their lives.
They will inherit equally from me too.I couldn,t possibly leave more to one than the other.

I am of the understanding that an English will can be divided however one choses.

GrandmaMoira Fri 29-Jul-16 17:07:31

Your mother can go to a different solicitor if she is not happy with this one's advice.

Mumsy Fri 29-Jul-16 17:02:55

Ive recently changed my will and disinherited two children and grandchildren and left everything to my son, its up to your mother what she wants to leave and to whom. I have however written in a letter for my son to give the courts in case the other kids contest my will.
It can be costly to change a will depending on solicitors, it might be worth looking in to see if it will be cheaper to write a new will and destroy the old one.

granjura Fri 29-Jul-16 16:48:03

Indeed you are lucky in the UK that you can do exactly what you wish with your will. Unlike in many European countries where you cannot disinherit, even a child who has treated you really badly.

DanniRae Fri 29-Jul-16 16:39:13

My aunt has left everything to her daughter and nothing to her son. This because her daughter is there for her and she rarely sees her son. In case he contests it she has left him a letter explaining her reasons. There is quite a lot of money involved and I guess he thinks he is due a nice tidy inheritance when she sadly passes away - she is about 94. Boy, is he in for a shock!