Spending money on yourself - easy or hard?

Tmeadow, I am so sorry to hear about your dear daughter.

I am still recovering from back problems which started last May. I have got to the stage where I don’t have to take painkillers any more but I do have problems after doing heavy housework chores. So I did some research and found my problem could be helped with shoes with an arch support so I ordered a pair of Vionic slippers and found they made a big difference so I ordered a pair of Vionic boots as well. I have never spent so much on footwear in my life and I do feel guilty about the cost and keep thinking of how else I could have used the money for the family but I think the result will be worth the outlay.

grannyactivist I love liquorice too and so does my younger son. I always loved it as a child and used to spend some of my pocket money on liquorice root which we used to get from a market stall.

I am so pleased you bought the liquorice advent calendar you will just love it. I have had one 2 years running and was hoping for one this year too, but it has sadly not been the case . The liquorice is worth every penny, enjoy and I hope you treat yourself next year.

I was brought up on liquorice preferably salted, so it is an addiction for me, we buy triple salted liquorice on Amazon and I go through a kg bag a month, just love it.

I find it easy to spend on myself but its always things for my baking like new moulds and tins.
I do have one extravagance though. For Easter, My Birthday and Christmas I buy a tin of biscuits from F&M at £17.99 but they are delicious - and I do share.

It sounds to like your a lovely warm kind person, I know you'll be embarrassed by this compliment. Just remember sometimes it's your turn, be kind to yourself and eat your sweets with pleasure

Like most of you, I spent a good deal of my adult life scrimping and saving, so I do find it hard to justify buying things for myself.

However, now that I am seventy, I realise that we might as well enjoy ourselves within reason, so although I still don't fritter money away on things we don't really want or need, I am prepared to buy something if it fulfills a heartfelt wish, or makes daily life easier.

Look at it this way - you didn't have the money before, but for a few minutes of your time you were able to treat yourself to something that you wanted .
So you are no further forward or back but have a lovely pack of liquorice that you will no doubt enjoy over Christmas and New Year (if it lasts that long!)

? This is just a test, wouldn’t let me post my proper message because it said I hadn’t logged in although I was logged in. Tried several times, losing the will to live now ?

Did it this time so I’m going to try with my original message once more ? if not it’s bye bye ?

Good for you grannyactivist, I empathise completely. I've just treated myself to a Beatles Advent Calender reduced from £109 to £69.25 after taking advantage of discount codes. I too don't have expensive hobbies so why not splurge out on ourselves for a change! Enjoy your licorice.

So, here we go again final try!
I have always found it very difficult to spend money on myself and really need to think long and hard before I do. When I eventually do buck up the courage to buy a new item of clothing for example it stays in the wardrobe for at least a year and only then will I bring it out for a special occasion. Is there a name for this condition?!? I think it may stem from as a child having keeping things for Sunday best. I would absolutely love to have a certain beauty treatment but because it costs £350 upfront then another £200 every 12 - 18 months for a top up I cannot bring myself to book an appointment. Even though my family have offered to give me money for Xmas to go towards it. Am I being silly? It gives me great pleasure to spend money on other people. What do others think I should do? See a doctor maybe??

Very easy just ask my OH!

I used to find it hard but not anymore, I plan to spend every dime I have on myself if I'm fortunate enough to. Who am I saving anything for? My selfish adult children or relatives that might spend a couple of days crying after I'm gone...nope I travel, buy expensive perfume and skin care products and treat myself to the best I can afford. I've paid my dues so yes it's all about me, if I'm not good to myself who will be...the treasures you polish and hold on to for dear life will ultimately end up sold or in a thrift store somewhere, enjoy your life, spend your money on yourself because when you pass to "the upper room" trust and believe your family will have a grand old time spending your money!

I didn’t have much as a child. In my early adult years, we struggled a bit financially. Then I progressed in my career and earned a very good salary (nearly 3 times as much as my then husband). I have never had trouble treated myself to what I fancy since then. Remember this life isn’t a rehearsal. If you’d like something and can afford it, buy it!

My mother couldn't bring herself to spend much on herself. I've now found that I cannot bring myself to spend her savings either as I know how hard she scrimped for it and I didn't earn it.

I find it extremely difficult, and have described it as depriving myself like people deprive themselves of food - though not medically serious like anorexia - but maybe a form of control. I’ve frequently returned things that I’ve bought because’ I shouldn’t have ‘.

It is ridiculous really.
I thought I might treat myself to a pretty cheap necklace.
By the time I'd looked for cheaper and cheaper ones similar, I'd lost the notion, and now I don't want one.

I'm always treating myself to stuff I don't need - but I fancy. In my younger days, I'd never dream of it, everything went on the kids, pets house etc. but now I'm old I deserve it.

So many interesting replies, thank you.

My older sister shared the same poverty stricken childhood as me and responded very differently. She earned a lot of money, but she was very glad to be able to buy anything she wanted. She was quite generous to others in the family, but splurged extravagantly, and often, on things she wanted.

grannybuy

I find it extremely difficult, and have described it as depriving myself like people deprive themselves of food - though not medically serious like anorexia - but maybe a form of control. I’ve frequently returned things that I’ve bought because’ I shouldn’t have ‘.

This is so me! It's easy to say, just treat yourself - but when you've got that inner voice telling you you don't deserve it, or you can't justify it, then it's hard to overcome that.

Tmeadow2 .

I used to worry about buying things for myself, but now I treat myself every so often. I live alone, divorced with only my sister as family. She's the one who always says to me when I dither "if you can't treat yourself who else will" and she's so right. I'm glad you spent that money on you, not the house, bills, etc, good on you!

Thank you for the warning folks!

I absolutely love the salty stuff - and yes, I am aware of the potential for side effects that may necessitate rather more frequent trips to the loo.

For those who want to see what I spent my money on - here’s a photo. I got free shipping, plus a free jar, and an additional £10 off, hence £50.

I don’t like wasting money but as I’ve got older I find it easier to spend a little more on myself. If I’m out and see something I really like or there’s something I need and I can afford it I will get it now and not feel guilty. Like others, I prefer quality over quantity, I don't believe in saving things for best, if I have some really nice perfume I use it, a nice dress I wear it. As long as the bills are paid and you can afford it go ahead and treat yourself occasionally.
I do know someone who would absolutely love a liquorice advent calendar, will have a look at those, enjoy ?