Would this be your reaction?

But if it was a 17 year old girl leaving to live with her ex-teacher would we see it differently? Reminds me of the thread about Jeremy Forrest a few months ago. I would be as devastated as this mother whether it was my son or my daughter. And equally disapproving of the teacher in question.

DH had a brief thing with a female teacher ay 16.

Not something he boasts about. I should bloody think not !!!

The main outrage about the Forrest case was that the girl was under the age of consent. The lad in this case is not under the age of consent so, technically, it's none of his mum's business.

Before people get outraged, please note that I did say "technically".

And, in any case, as petra says, the mum reaction sounds a bit over the top. There are fathers who are the same age. There is also birth control.

One of my daughter's school friends married her vicar when she was 17 - he was in his late twenties. As far as I know, they remained very happily married. I think there are bound to be romances between some teachers and their pupils, and as long as no sexual activity takes place whilst they are still in a teacher/pupil relationship, I see no reason why they should not go on to a happy marriage.
This mother is certainly over-reacting. Perhaps she is jealous.

I think this mother needs to be careful or she might lose her son completely. As parents there comes a time when we have to stand back.

Here's what she should do

The teacher in question had been convicted and placed on the sex offenders register for the relationship because he was her pupil at the time. Although he was 17, and we may have different views about whether that is right or not, the law is quite clear and I think it does raise questions about her judgement and suitability to be a teacher in the first place. That's why I would have been devastated (perhaps not a good word to use) and very angry with the teacher. As well as which she is said to have promised the parents she would back off but they felt she hadn't kept her word. So I can understand their reaction, particularly because I don't think my boys were at all mature at 17, much less so than girls of that age.

That does put a different slant on it, nightowl. I still think it's excessive to say one's life is over in the circumstances. She will be upset and cross and worried, sure.

Yes, it does help to have the full story before being invited to comment
Oh, bags, how I would love to use that way of dealing with the sorrows of life and mostly, I can.

I agree it's excessive thatbags, no-one died, and we all have to accept that our children will do things we may not like as they become adults. I do sympathise with them though - look how easily I used the word 'devastated' in my first post, which is also an over-reaction. It's not always easy to be rational where our offspring are concerned, however old they might be.

Here's the link

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2416179/Teacher-sex-offenders-register-affair-pupil-moves-teenager-marital-home.html

Hasn't helped matters by putting all this in the press has she. Do people who give these interviews to the press receive payment?

Her son is not terminally ill, is not dead, his life is not over, her family's life is not over and her life is not over.

Her son is now eighteen, he could join the army and be off to Afghanistan.

To have your school child involved in a sexual relationship with a teacher must be a shock and cause anger and distress, it does not end lives, by this interview she is driving him further away from home . He could now marry the woman if he chose to.

And neither is he in prison.
trouble with talking to the press is that if you dont say anything sensational they will make something up anyway.

When I was in the sixth form three girls were in relationships with teachers. They were very discreet but we all knew. The girls were seventeen and the men were in their twenties. They all went on to get married. One ended in divorce after twenty odd years (nothing strange these days) and the other two are still going strong.

Whilst these relationships are illegal they're also sometimes genuine.

A teacher is in a position of trust and should not have encouraged the lad.

I feel for the mother, and agree with those who say that teacher's shouldn't have relationships with pupils. I appreciate some go on to have life long relationships, but I feel adults in positions of power and authority should back off and be responsible. Ten years age difference at 17 is a lot. I also agree this mother has done no one any favours by speaking to the press. Her anger won't help build any bridges with her son, who is of the age of consent. I'm not condoning this relationship, or the behaviour of the woman teacher, but I do feel it's different than the case JF - where the girl was 14 when they began a 'close friendship' that developed into an illegal sexual relationship.

I think there are two issues here. The relationship between pupil and teacher and I think these should be totally out of bounds even if the pupil concerned is over the age of consent.

The second issue is the way so many people nowadays after any major dislocation in their lives from this to the loss of a family member go round saying that their lives are ruined and they will never be able to function again etc etc. I am not being callous. 20 years ago my sister was killed in a car accident . It was devastating event for all of us, we are a close family and her loss affected everybody deeply. My parents were both on the cusp of 80 so could have been destroyed by such an event but in fact even in our deepest grief nobody started being melodramatic and claiming their lives were utterly destroyed or anything else like that. We grieved but life went on.

My parents both lived another 10 years and gradually returned to their usual, friends and activities. At every family event there was an absence we spoke about but all this nonsense about lives destroyed every time life does not go as planned trivialises the lives of those who really do suffer from having their lives destroyed like the millions of Syrian refugees and other victims of war.

Totally agree. Too much exaggeration these days because it makes good headlines. I bet the mother didn't tell her story for free either.

I know I'm in the minority here but it's not like he was underage and tbh who is it hurting. If anything it will be the woman because he's got a lot of growing up to do and when he does he may not want her anymore. She's invested emotionally and destroyed her good name in this relationship. I can't believe she'd do that if she wasn't in love.

My dad married my mam when he was 28 and she was 18. OK so he wasn't her teacher but he was a man with far more experience of life than she had. He'd already served in the Navy during WWII and the Korean War. He'd been a merchant seaman on a deep sea tug. In fact he lived a very 'exotic' life for the early 1950s. She still lived at home with her parents and worked for the GPO. They went on to have a very happy marriage.

I feel no sympathy for the teacher whatsoever. She's an adult and made her choice. I feel sympathy for the boy's parents but agree the mother has overreacted and not helped to build bridges with her son. I feel some sympathy for the boy because his life story has been splashed across the media without his permission. Everyone locally will know who he is.

The mother seems more bent on revenge than regaining a relationship with her son , why the need to tell the press , it may well do more to keep her son away. If this relationship comes to a halt lets hope she will not tell her story yet again

She'll be on Jezza next bemoaning that her son wants nothing to do with her.

If she hadn't spoken to the press it would have been a nine day wonder locally. When you think of the really appalling things that happen to people - illness, death, divorce, poverty - it's really not the end of the world. It may be very unpleasant but it is survivable.

Teachers know it is wrong to encourage, instigate, pursue any form of emotional/sexual relationship with a pupil. If they genuinely feel they are falling for a pupil over that age of consent then they need to put it on hold, resign form the job and then see if it is true love.

What people know they should do and what they do when in love are often two different things.