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Brexit dividing my family.

(432 Posts)
iluvsylvanianfamilies51 Fri 06-Dec-19 13:10:03

I voted leave in 2016 and had no idea it would come to this. I really think this country has never felt more divided. Walking on eggshells when discussing things with friends, family, neighbours. Not wanting to offend but not wanting to back down. It is horrible.

What makes me sad is that it feels like families are splintered and there's so much resentment. Grandkids all voted remain and kids voted remain and leave. All have arguments about it all the time and I feel them getting more closed off to each other.I t is unbearably sad. We shouldnt be divided like this.

I'm sure others feel the same but the reason I post is because my granddaughter sent me this video and I think it articulates it really well. You may not like Labour or momentum but I think we will agree that this tension between leave/remain leaves us weaker. And when I voted in 2016 I didn't think it would be so drawn out. I feel embarrassed about that

twitter.com/PeoplesMomentum/status/1202573131606573056

I have been on the fence about who to vote for but I despise Johnson for his comments on single mothers (AND his racism!) and I think Labour are the best chance we have to get a better leave deal and bring our country back together again. In 2015 I never expected political division to make living rooms tense and communities divided. I wish we could have it back and this stalemate to be over.

crystaltipps Mon 09-Dec-19 03:22:25

No one is going to “work together” to diminish or impoverish their lives. I’ll “respect” the result of the GE, but I know that in a few years time there is a chance to change it, and I will “respect” The right of the opposition to challenge the government and hold it to account.

Ginny42 Mon 09-Dec-19 08:25:21

Frankly I doubt the country will ever 'work together' again. Too many factions. No amount of 'working together' can paper over the gaping cracks created by Tory attempts to deal with issues within their party by subjecting us all to this.

freyja Mon 09-Dec-19 08:58:58

I would rather live in cloud cuckoo land then in this country at the present time just tell me where it is. grin

Where there is hope there is a way, I just hope we find peace before its too late smile

newnanny Mon 09-Dec-19 09:47:37

Labour are not offering a leave deal. They are offering remainjng in SM and CU so we can't trade with anyone who does not trade with EU or remain and they are doing double stitch up by offrjng immigrants the vote too. No other EU country does this, so effectivelh allowing immigrants to decide future of UK. I"m backing Boris to get us out of EU on Jan 31st. Then country can heal. If immigrants decide our fate the ciuntry will remain duvided and bitter.

Starblaze Mon 09-Dec-19 09:49:52

So people living here and paying taxes shouldn't get the vote? Ok

jura2 Mon 09-Dec-19 09:54:42

I do not believe that the EU will offer Corbyn, or anyone for that matter- a 'cake and eat it with unicorns' kind of deal. They can't, as it would weaken Europe and encourage others to do the same. But it is good that they should try- and then put it back to the People. Truly democratic. They got my vote- but I so wish I was voting for Starmer, rather than Corbyn.

I've voted for a Second Vote- the rest is all secondary. I certainly wish that Starmer will take over and lead to a Lib Dem and others coalition- to keep Tories out for a VERY VERY long time (forever would be best).

GrannyGravy13 Mon 09-Dec-19 09:59:19

If people living here and paying taxes, apply for British Citizenship and are accepted, have a British Passport then and only then should they be able to vote in parliamentary elections/referenda.

Callistemon Mon 09-Dec-19 10:03:59

The trouble is, jura, it would go out to the membership to vote for a new leader if ever Corbyn acknowledges that he is not the right man and sensible Starmer won't stand a chance.

Starblaze Mon 09-Dec-19 10:07:13

Lol oh well I don't have a passport, I can't vote then?

Anyone who is a part of the political community, pays taxes and is therfore a stakeholder in their local area and the country as a whole should be able to vote.

MaizieD Mon 09-Dec-19 10:09:29

While I very much appreciate the view that, should we have another referendum, EU nationals living here should be able to vote, but I think that Labour has made a mistake in proposing it. If we have another referendum the electorate should be the on the same terms same as for the 2016 ref. To propose anything else muddies the waters far too much.

Starblaze Mon 09-Dec-19 10:10:49

MaizieD, very fair point, agreed

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 10:52:23

People who live here, but choose not to become citizens of the UK should not have a vote, the idea is ridiculous in my opinion. However, people who have chosen to become citizens most certainly should have a vote. Where else in the world would a country allow citizens of other countries, who have chosen not to become naturalised, to vote in their elections?

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 10:55:07

Agreed Maizie, clearly if there ever is a second referendum, the criteria to vote must remain the same, anything different would leave itself open to criticism of vote rigging by Parliament.

Summerlove Mon 09-Dec-19 11:02:00

If immigrants decide our fate the country will remain duvided and bitter.

Replace immigrants with “old people”/“women”/whatever

This thought process is so beyond what I would have expected in the U.K. even just 5 years ago. Makes me sad.

MaizieD Mon 09-Dec-19 11:10:25

People who live here, but choose not to become citizens of the UK ..

Thank you for agreeing with me earlier, maddyone, but on this point you seem to forget that EU nationals didn't have to become UK citizens to live here as of right. Any more than did UK nationals living in any other EU country have to become citizens of that country in order to live there as of right. Don't blame them for having the rug pulled from under their feet.

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 11:39:30

No, you’re right Maizie, I did know that, and obviously it’s not EU citizens fault that all of this has happened. However, it’s just my opinion obviously, but I do feel that anyone living here full time should naturalise in order to gain full citizens rights. I do know people from Europe who have done this, and it is what I would advise anyone to do who intends to live here permanently.

jura2 Mon 09-Dec-19 11:43:19

Exactly, I chose to take British nationality- because I arrived in UK before the EU - and had to to remain and work, etc. We 'had to get married' too - not because I was pregnant ... but that was the only way we could stay together.

Had I arrived after the EU, I probably would not have done so, as there would have been no need or incentive to do so - as rights, etc, were protected.

BTW in Switzerland, UK citizens who live here either have a short permit, a B permit or after 5 years, a C permit. C permit holders can vote in local elections, but not in Federal/national elections. The Maire of my Commune (Council) is NOT a Swiss citizen. He was born and bred in Belgium, has lived here for over 20 years- and was elected a Maire, but has chosen not to take Swiss nationality. Doing a great job too.

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 11:48:09

Incidentally, I do feel sorry for EU citizens who are bound up in this mess, and it’s clear that we still need many of them to live and work here. But as I said earlier, my advice to anyone caught up in all of this would be to take out British citizenship. Likewise for British citizens living permanently in the EU to take out citizenship of wherever they are living.

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 11:50:30

That’s the situation here too jura, EU citizens (and probably others not from the EU) can vote in local elections but not national elections, as I understand it.

MerylStreep Mon 09-Dec-19 11:57:08

Starblaze
lol oh well I don't have a passport, I can't vote then
I'm assuming you have a birth certificate? I think you'll find that this document trumps a passport when proving your British/ English citizenship.

varian Mon 09-Dec-19 11:57:20

EU citizens living in the UK are allowed to vote in local elections and EU parliament elections, their names are on the electoral register, so of course they should be allowed to vote in UK parliamentary elections and referenda.

No taxation without representation is a fundamental pillar of democracy.

maddyone Mon 09-Dec-19 12:09:02

Well that’s an extremely valid point Varian.

Opal Mon 09-Dec-19 12:40:12

Oh, and we all know what you will have voted for. The most appalling candidate in our history to be PM... It's not as if it's a secret...
Why should I keep it a secret? I am voting Tory, I can't imagine anything worse than Corbyn et al getting into Government, it would be a complete economic disaster.

growstuff Mon 09-Dec-19 12:58:28

Have you ever thought of signing up for an elementary course in economics, Opal?

Opal Mon 09-Dec-19 13:45:32

No, growstuff, have you ever thought of signing up for a "how to talk to people without coming across as a condescending old bat" class?