Gransnet forums

My Ruby Wedding

(64 Posts)
facebook button twitter button email this page print this page
Kacee Sun 16-Jul-17 10:48:23

My husband left me 2 an a half years ago for a younger model.
Today would have been my Ruby Wedding anniversary. I still miss him dreadfully an am really sad that today will pass without anyone acknowledging it. It was my wedding day

grannysue05 Sun 16-Jul-17 10:56:32

Oh Kacee ..... what a sad day for you as you are still grieving for your lost love.
If DH left you for someone younger....he wasn't worth it!
I wish you could find happiness again.
Hugs and love. flowers

silverlining48 Sun 16-Jul-17 10:57:12

Sorry that you are sad today. It must be hard and most people you know will probably not be awAre of the date and what it means to you.
Dont stay home alone , ring a friend or family and suggest meeting up or do something nice for yourself and try not to spend too much time thinking about things.

Christinefrance Sun 16-Jul-17 12:04:22

Good advice silverlining, do something nice and extravagant for yourself Kacee, you are worth it. flowers

Teetime Sun 16-Jul-17 12:23:43

Kaycee I'm sorry its a bad day for you. flowers

Hilltopgran Sun 16-Jul-17 12:51:40

I am sorry to read this, it is your wedding day anniversary. Have you family or friend you can phone and talk to. It maybe it is not forgotten but others are not sure what to do so if you say nothing they will take a lead from you.

My sister was widowed just before her Ruby anniversay and was dreading it for weeks, in the end we had a nice meal together. Do try and tell someone, sending a virtual hug.

Swanny Sun 16-Jul-17 13:05:34

I would have celebrated my Golden anniversary at the end of last year. However my one-time DH moved on many years ago and has moved a couple of more times since. I still felt sad for what we had and hoped that he remembered too. Sending (((hugs))) and flowers for you.

Peep Sun 16-Jul-17 13:13:46

Me too, Ruby a fortnight ago, replaced by younger model 11 years ago - still waiting for divorce to be finalised!! Like others have said treat yourself to something nice. flowers

Kacee Sun 16-Jul-17 13:20:36

Oh well, I've been through the 'this time 40 years ago we were in the registry offce' etc etc.
I feel quite strange about it, sort of nothing. Maybe I am finally moving on.
She is 17 years younger than him. He retires in a year or two. I wonder how things will pan out for him then.
Hey how.
Thank you all for your kind thoughts.

nanaK54 Sun 16-Jul-17 13:21:23

kacee flowers

Starlady Sun 16-Jul-17 13:32:46

(((Hugs)))

Since you don't feel anything, though, maybe you are "moving on." Perhaps you were expecting to feel something and are surprised that you don't? Maybe you think you "should" feel something because "It was (your) wedding day." But feelings or the lack of them can't be helped. And it's probably good if you don't care anymore.

I would treat myself to something special, anyway, but that's just me.

Kacee Sun 16-Jul-17 14:07:32

Starley I think you may be right. I think I should feel something an I really don't. Maybe I am used to being on my own now.

Still all seems rather sad. We were together since I was 13.

Kittye Sun 16-Jul-17 14:27:44

Hugs and flowers

morethan2 Sun 16-Jul-17 15:04:49

flowers life can be pretty shitty horrible at times can't it. Somtimes all we can do is grit our teeth and hope the day passes quickly. Watch a DVD, go for a walk or have a cry and eat chocolate. I hope tomorrow is a better day.

mumofmadboys Sun 16-Jul-17 15:20:07

The day will soon be over.Hugs xx

kittylester Sun 16-Jul-17 15:35:16

I'm sorry kacee. Most of us go into marriage with high expectations and that must be sad for you even if you aren't so bothered about the man himself.

Kacee Sun 16-Jul-17 22:43:20

Thank you all for your kind words.
The day is nearly over an on the whole I have been OK.
Let's see what the next year brings smile]

grannyqueenie Sun 16-Jul-17 22:52:40

As Kitty says maybe your sadness is as much about the loss of what might have been the hopes and dreams you started out with 40 years ago as the loss of the man himself. Wishing you happy times in the year to come 💐

Starlady Mon 17-Jul-17 02:37:16

With him since you were 13? Maybe you outgrew each other? Or perhaps, rather, you matured and he didn't, which is why he went for a "younger model?"

I bet there's a lot you haven't done/would like to do that you couldn't because he didn't want to, etc. Now you can. You still have a lot of living ahead of you. You might even find a new love, for all you know. Onward and upward!

Luckylegs9 Mon 17-Jul-17 06:31:53

I feel for you Kacee, you had a lot of good years together, but start to plan what you want out of life, no one else, just you and make it happen, something to look forward to. You can have a very good life, albeit different.

Theoddbird Mon 17-Jul-17 10:11:04

We split up just after 25th anniversary. Would have been Ruby last year. I so regretted getting married on Valentines Day....just can't forget it...hahaha. I have moved on and have a totally new life now. As said take your self out for the day with a friend. Treat yourself to something nice...you deserve it. x

pamdixon Mon 17-Jul-17 10:12:15

life never does turn out how we expect it to does it. Poor you - sun is shining today (well it is where I am) so enjoy the lovely weather and I hope you will look after yourself for a few days - as the others have said, go on - spoil yourself!

mags1234 Mon 17-Jul-17 10:16:01

A wee break maybe? A bus tour for a couple of days is good for folk on their own, or with a friend? A spa day? Anything u fancy, celebrate the good parts then celebrate the fact u r moving on!

maryhoffman37 Mon 17-Jul-17 10:20:40

We are acknowledging it right here. I would be crass to say "happy anniversary" but we can congratulate you on firstly having sustained a presumably good marriage for 37 years and secondly surviving being abandoned. Give yourself a very nice day of coffee/lunch with friends,shop for clothes, do something just for yourself, like reading in the sun, taking a boat trip, going to a film or whatever you enjoy. And maybe even get drunk if that's what you feel like. Acknowledge the happiness and the sadness. Life's rich pattern.

Hm999 Mon 17-Jul-17 10:21:57

Hope you got through yesterday ok. Look towards future, and plan good things based on the love this page has sent you. Good luck x

Add your message here

To post you need a valid nickname and password. Log in if you are a returning member, or join for free.

If you have forgotten your nickname or your password, you can get a reminder.