I'm so scared

I'm not surprised you feel afraid, and I'm so sorry. I wish I had words to comfort you, but I'm struggling.
Whatever happens, the worst result, or the best, you will have each other to lean on, and will draw strength from the other. sending you both all my best wishes x

Sending hugs xx

Echoing what MissA said Smileless.

Prostrate problems are common in men of a certain age and prostrate cancer can be treated quite successfully. Please don´t worry. You are lucky to have caught the problem through a routine check. Believe that all will be alright. We have been through a similar scare recently, but it turned out to be OK, just to be monitored regularly. It is lovely that you were able to turn to each other for support. Fingers crossed.

I’m struggling with what to say to you too. I don’t know anything about prostrate problems but Polyester post seems positive, so perhaps you can hold on to that. In your shoes I’d be scared. Hold on tight to each other, keep planning your future and looking forward to holidays and let us know how things go. It’ll be a long hard week Smileless and I’ll be thinking about you and looking out for future posts.

I so understand your anxiety, and your love for your husband as I feel the same.My husbands brother has just been diagnosed with prostate cancer, but has other problems too and has been told his prostate is the least of his worries at the moment as there is lots they can do.I'm just sat here at the moment reading up about it and wondering how I can get my husband to the doctor for a test, it's not going to be easy.The best of luck to you both .

Smileless yours is a wonderful story of a love that's spanned many years and I'm wishing you both through this anxious time and many more happy years together. xx

Hoping all will be well and sending my best wishes to you both. I understand the feelings you are having.

Sending positive and warm thoughts to you and Mr S Smileless. We have loved one's with advanced PC, living well several years after diagnosis. The treatments seem to be more effective with every passing year. One man was diagnosed 6 years ago as having advanced PC, palliative care only. Such a shock at the time but he is remains fit and active and has had a number of different treatments. Early diagnosis is usually a positive. Look after yourselves.

I'm sorry to hear about your problems Smileless it's a big worry I know. Take heart from my husband's case, he has had treatment for bladder and prostate cancer over the last 12 years. It's not been very comfortable for him at times but he continues to be active and enjoy life to the full. Do hope things turn out well for your husband too.

Dear Smileless I do feel for you. Whatever the future held (and paw had incurable longer term issues as well as regular short term crises - he knew the score) I was always one of those “OK let’s deal with this one now and cross the other bridges when we come to them” it was my way of putting one foot in front of the other.
However...and I know we are all different, I also wish I had sometimes admitted my fears for the future instead of doing my crying only in private.
Just to hold hands, admit you are worried and scared, to let him admit it too and then say that whatever comes you will face up to it TOGETHER.
All this being brave and stiff upper lip malarkey is overrated.
By all means be optimistic and remember that more men die WITH prostate cancer than FROM it. All may well be fine and if not the next question to the medics is “Right, what are you going to do about it” but just for now, be honest with each other, then have a hug and face the day with a smile.
If only I had a second chance to do that last bit

Just sending you both very best wishes * Smileless*
I know very well how you are feeling.
I had tests for breast cancer and the week between the biopsy and the results were dreadful. Huge highs when convinced it would be ok and deep lows with the dread it would be bad news.
It was bad news but 18 years on I am here and fine.
Keep talking to each other, supporting each other and reassuring each other. Keep us posted.

Brilliant comments here smileless so I can add nothing but a big hug!

And another big hug and some from me, smileless. Your love for your DH shines through from your post. All best wishes.

The waiting for a biopsy and its results is a horrible time.

Everything else I tried to write sounds trite, so just

Mr C was diagnosed following a biopsy and then a bone scan - luckily it has spread. We were at Addenbrookes yesterday to see a surgeon but he isn't suitable because of his BMI. Oncologist next week. We are keeping positive and supporting each other. Close friends are in the know and being so kind. He has told his sons but doesn't know whether/when to tell his parents. I think op is in USA but I have foundone Prostate Cancer UK very informative and they have a local support group. There is also a FB group. In the UK prostate cancer is headline news today. It needs all the publicity it can get.

Sorry you have this anxiety hanging over your head - waiting is very hard.

I do however have several friends with PC who have had it for years and are living life to the full. They had some radiotherapy for several weeks and now just have check-ups.

If they have been keeping a close eye on your OH over the last few years then they will be in there at an early stage which is good. But I know that does not stop you worrying. We would all be the same.

? All the best for you and Mr S x

Smileless It’s natural to worry about something like this and it does make you re-evaluate and feel grateful for a long and happy relationship.
Try to see the positive side - MrS has been monitored for years and something has been picked up at a very early stage.
You don’t say whether the biopsy will remove the whole nodule or just a sample, but let’s hope that it’s the whole thing and this time next week, it is over and done with.
Thinking of you

My husband was diagnosed with intermediate pc last year. He had surgery in june, and though he still has some post op symptoms these are managed. Subsequent appointments confirm the cancer is clear but if he ever needs further treatment he can still have the radiotherapy option.
I wish you and your husband well, its no use saying dont worry because of course you will worry, but despite what today's news about mens recovery says, it is one of the ‘best’ ones to have if one is unlucky enough to get it. Good luck.

Smilesless This is indeed very scary for you. This may or may not help to reassure you, I hope it does. Out of the blue about 4 years ago, my DH was diagnosed with prostate cancer. It was devastating. There were no symptoms, he was just getting up in the night for go to the loo rather a lot and after seeing a TV campaign, went to his GP. We never thought for a minute it would be cancer (I don't know why). However, it was and we had to deal with it. For some reason they wouldn't remove the prostate and he had 37 days of radiotherapy plus several hormone injections. Scans showed it hadn't spread fortunately. Today he is as fit as a fiddle. He had his annual blood test to check on it in September and everything was fine. I think the good thing for your DH is that they have been monitoring it. I think problems arise when it is left too late. Good luck

Lots of supportive messages here. Just some to add x

Thank you all for your caring and supportive messages, hugs and flowers.

It's just as you describe it annsixty, huge highs and deep lows. It's good to know that you remain well despite your diagnoses 18 years ago.

I'm sorry to hear about your brother in law Seaside and hope that you can get your DH to go and get checked. I knew there was something wrong with Mr. S. because when he went to the loo it had gone from sounding like Niagra falls to a trickle. He was very reluctant but went because he knew I was worried about him.

Thank you Mawbroom I think you're right. We're both trying to be brave and upbeat for one another; perhaps we're being too brave and as you say, if I open up about it he might feel he can tell me how he's really feeling.

I don't know how long we'll have to wait for the results but we're both like you in feeling better when we know what we've got to deal with. It's the not knowing that's so awful.

Thank you Iam and Christinefrance, your posts have helped me feel more positive today.

for you and your DH chelseababy I hope that all will be well for you. Yes, I heard it on the news this morning and I agree that it needs all the publicity it can get.

I'll keep you posted. for you all and once again, my thanks.

I can't add anything that hasn't already been said. I understand and empathise with how you're feeling and add my and a cyber hug along with best wishes to you both for good news next week.