Mr. S. is having surgery next week, a biopsy. He's been having his prostate monitored for, I don't know at least 10 years now.
He had an MRI just before Christmas and they've found a nodule that they're not happy with, hence the biopsy.
I suppose we became complacent, lots of tests but never anything untoward and now this. My head tells me that he'll be OK, if it is anything they've caught it early and he'll be fine. My heart is scared that I might lose him .
We're estranged from our youngest son and only GC. Our DS lives in Oz. His marriage broke up 4 months ago so we haven't said anything about his dad and we wont, unless there's something to say.
We're hugging each other more than we usually do. He keeps buying me yellow roses to cheer me up. Not that I'm letting him know how worried I am. I tell him he'll be fine and I don't let him see me when I cry, when I can hardly breath because I'm so, so afraid.
We've struggled with the loss of our son and GC. We moved 14 months ago and it's been wonderful. Beginning a new chapter in our lives, together. Discovering that there is a life after estrangement, together.
He told me a few weeks ago that he felt as if things were coming to an end. We completed on the sale of our property in Florida yesterday and tonight he told me that neither of us could have managed the sale without the support we give one another. It was a nightmare, the buyers were unbelievably difficult.
I was 16 when we met, 19 when we married; it will be our 38th wedding anniversary this year. He's my whole world, my sun, moon and stars and it's getting harder to wait for the biopsy and the results.
We've had a lovely evening. Out for a meal to celebrate the sale and talking about the things we're going to do, the holidays we plan to have but there's that cloud of uncertainty hanging over us.
We're playing it down with family friends, especially family as we don't want to cause unnecessary alarm and upset. We smile and nod when they say 'don't worry it'll be fine' but I am worried, I'm scared. I haven't told him so and he hasn't told me, but I know he;s scared too.
. So in other words he lived a long time with pc.
.