Hilmix: It has taken me 55 years of marriage to a sulker to realise how controlling he's been. He won't eat any shop bought food except custard tartlets. He too makes sarcastic, cutting remarks about food I cook. Friends, however, compliment me on my cooking, so it can't be that bad. For the first time recently I've started " biting back". I challenge him about his comments and tell him how he makes me feel. Then I say things like," No more apple pies for you until you apologise." At first he seemed amazed, then he almost whispers an apology. I remind myself that the poor old bugger is 81, has few pleasures, like a lot of old people, food being a major one, but I refuse to field these nasty comments any more. I've threatened him with divorce in the past, and I think he knows I mean it. I don't like sinking to such ploys, but for my own very eroded self respect I intend to hold my own. Very sad, when your husband is supposed to be your best friend. My thoughts are with you.