GrannyOrNanny. (I'm "Granny")I would say do not compare yourself to others. You have two true loyal long-standing friends. These are the real friends. While it is lovely to go to groups and meet kind, friendly people, we do not become close friends with them in the way you have your friendship with your friends. I believe there is research in Psychology about friends - I did my degree in the early 1990s - which found on average people had about 2 to 4 friends in our close circle near to us whom we trust and whom we know really well, then other friends are in circles further out. The research, I am sure I remember, found that for good mental health a person needs only a few friends, maybe just two, in the nearest circle.
I am like you. Partly from being disabled and not getting out, but also it is in my nature. So many of my really close friends have died, many not from being old. I now have about two close friends but even one of those has been "using" me a bit and has hurt me rather. I have become very self-sufficient, although I am not entirely sure it is the best way. However, the stronger you are on your own the better you can live your life, I have found.
My mother craved company which made it difficult for her. I am the opposite, fortunately for me. I would rather be at home alone than have to be politely sitting in a group that bores me. I learned this when a group at my Church changed drastically when the Leader changed. From being interesting and up to date it was tailored to her idea of elderly people who had cognitive problems. So we played endless Bingo on picture cards. It was driving me insane. I stopped going of course but then many of my dear friends from the group had passed on anyway.
Stick with your two friends. You are doing fine. If you want company do the things everyone suggests, join a class or go to a a group. I am so bad at this now I feel awful saying it! But I regard those things as "company" and not close friends!
