Moaning negativity

I realise we can all get wrapped up in our own lives. If I am out with or talking to someone on the phone, I worry afterwards that I talked about myself too much. I feel like ringing them to apologise! I don't think I do and hope I don't.

I had no idea we were known as the moaning nation

In Australia and New Zealand, where, of course we never complain, the British are known as Whinging Poms.

And what the French think of us is unprintable.

And I have to admit that when I first joined Gransnet, and having lived in New Zealand 46 years, I was absolutely gobsmacked by the negativity and ethos of complaining here.

Every little thing from commas to colleagues; grammar to gardening; nor-easters to neighbours.

And if there's nothing else to complain about, we attack one another!!

I often wonder, when I read a genuinely distressed post about a serious issue, how anyone can read that dry-eyed and then jump in with a gripe about a misplaced apostrophe.

What?!

First world problems.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude - you will be much happier if you do.

Or perhaps some of us don't want to be content because moans and unpleasantness gets us attention.

There, I've had my little moan - I'll get me coat.

I m not sure it’s always been so as we used to be the country with the stiff upper lip quietly getting on with things whilst outv right arm or left leg was hanging off but I ve noticed it in the last 30 or so years and I have also noticed it increasing in the last 5-10 years
Yes we are the whinging poms to many not a nice name but we seem able to live up to it very easily
I find social media one of the MOST whinging places in the world we seem to thrive on bad news

I often remark to my husband when people are whinging and whining about everything, how on earth they would have coped in previous generations.

I know you won’t all agree, but seriously, we don’t have so bad do we?

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/201907/medium-417276-80462320-acba-45e2-8c81-8e9424d71c8d.jpeg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/201907/medium-635473-9eb80c4c-b89f-4f75-ae6d-25dd3e94bc4c.jpeg

Bradfordlass you have summed up much of what I feel about today and, today on GN. What a grumpy place it has been of late. If I were to look for a turning point, sadly, it was round about the GE before the Referendum and then 2016 itself which seemed to consolidate the binary political differences.
But I don’t think it is just a case of viewing the past through rose tinted glasses to say we -and life - used to be otherwise.
People do get grumpier as they get older, look at children laughing, smiling (OK also crying) but generally full of optimism. So a site mostly of older people will tend to have a similar bias.
Just look at us and the hot air generated often over the most trivial issues. The existence of AIBU says it all
You wondered, what did we do before social media?
I think people moaned over the garden fence moaned at bus stops, , moaned “indoors” or moaned down the pub!

I’m guilty

Well, the whingers and self-obsessed will always be with us, and can’t always be avoided, unfortunately.

But the last thing I’m going to worry about is silly national stereotyping, by others about us or the other way round. I’m surprised anyone does.

Anniebach--you don't moan, you just tell it how it is. IMHO, " moaning" refers to complaining about trivial and unimportant things.

Loved seeing Ena, Minnie and Florrie again Maw great memories, what exactly was 'milk stout' which they always drank.

Mackesons is a milk stout. I’ve never had it, but imagine it as a sweeter version of Guinness? Might give it a try.

It's like the old joke where someone goes on and on about themselves, suddenly stops and says "Well, that's enough about me, lets talk about you. What do you think of my new hairdo/ outfit/ new car etc?"

It's become a regular joke in our family if someone has gone on for too long about their own concerns.

KatyK you don't sound like someone who would talk about herself too much.

I too used to worry about it and text my children to apologise. They would reply saying I knew you would do that (text after conversation ) You worry too much, mum.

Now if I start to think like that I stop and tell myself the other person won't be worrying.

Maw

I’m not saying people in previous generations didn’t moan, I’m sure they did, and probably over trivial things at times.

But I sometimes think about my dad, and what he’d have made of all this whining, and “airing your dirty washing in public “

I know we all have problems, some very much worse than others, But not everyone wants to hear about them

I feel I should stand up for dear old Minnie Caldwell, btw. She was a love, bossed about constantly by the other two. She would know just where the OP was coming from! She had a lodger who thought the world of her, didn’t she? Pootling off now to google vintage Corrie and wallow in nostalgia.

But I sometimes think about my dad, and what he’d have made of all this whining, and “airing your dirty washing in public “
I know we all have problems, some very much worse than others, But not everyone wants to hear about them

Good points, Sara could not agree more!

Negative energy is exhausting and contagious. People like this are unable to stop themselves from thinking and seeing everything in a negative life. And it's all about them and it will impact on them, or how they perceive it. And someone or something is always to blame.

It's quite toxic and I'm sure that many of them would prefer to be otherwise but they tend to get surrounded by others and inadvertently recruit. They are often scared of change and think the world is going to hell in a handcart. We are seeing it now with Brexit but it's nothing new. Back in the 80s I recall many people convinced we'd all be wiped out.

Remember the film When the Wind Blows ... little cartoon?I knew people that were convinced we'd all be wiped out by the year 2000. Same with AIDS. Same with Mad Cow Disease. People jump on the negativity, believe it because 'experts' say it's so. It also gives themselves a sense of importance and belief that they know far more than others. They enjoy getting together with like minded people and they tend to believe themselves superior and say anyone who is 'positive' is naive and gullible, when, in actual fact it's the opposite.

They gang together and 'laugh' at people who don't share their doom and gloom. But remember the old adage, 'he who laughs last, laughs longest'.

Back to your original post, Peonyrose! She probably didn't understand why you weren't agreeing and joining in with berating the world. She sounds a real pain!

Thank you annep I try not to but you don't know how you come across do you? I try to be interested in other people. I know every aspect of some of my friends' lives, including what their cat had for dinner. They know very little about me, as they rarely ask. No all of them, just a few.

In my case the bigger the problem, the less I moan although occasionally it’s good to get things off your chest. It is so hard being positive all the time but no one likes a moaner!

Anyone remember Mona Lott in ITMA? Probably not it was ages ago.:
"It's being so cheerful as keeps me going" – Mona Lott, a depressed laundrywoman played by Joan Harben".

Fennel My DH often says that to me. I wondered where it came from.

I agree dragonfly I don't like to talk about big problems - it is far too upsetting but wee moans - of course!
I moan about the moaners. The local FB forum is always good . They moan about the potholes and then moan about the roadworks attending to them.

There is this woman though, who I sometimes feel sorry for as she cannot stop talking about herself . Even if you try to get a word in edge-ways, she will counter your story with hers.

Is she aware of it, I wonder? Others are because I watch people melting away as she tries to hold court.
She's been married and divorced at least 3 times and her DC live as far away as possible. You see how cruel I am!
I MUST try to be kind.

She is a kind person herself who wouldn't say anything cruel about her friends and here am I being nasty about her.

She just wears people out. She never asks after my family or me but moans about her lack of good fortune in life. Everyone else is so lucky.

Milk Stout has added lactose, derived from milk, in its production. This made it sweeter than usual beer.

I've just looked that up. I always thought it was to do with breastfeeding mothers. and to give them more energy to make milk!

When I was breastfeeding I'd always order it at the pub. I thought it was medicine!!

They used to give us Guinness in our local maternity ward. One or two bottles just before lights out. How times change!

* Maggiemaybe* it's true.

I meet some people and they always say first how are you and I automatically say fine how are you, and then they start and I know what is coming, you would think at my age I would know better lol.