Daughters cold house at Christmas

Anyone who uses the term " back off" is too young to be on Gransnet.

It is worrying when someone you care for can be so stubborn; my MIL's house was always freezing cold and I was forced to shorten a visit there one winter as young DD and I were chilled to the bone but MIL never seemed to feel it.
She did eventually have central heating installed and used it but she would have been well into her 80s by then.

I'm glad you've got Christmas lunch sorted, BoB but, quite honestly, I don't know what the answer is to allay your DD's anxieties, unless using the cat as a lever would help. Cats do seek warmth, they like sitting in those fluffy 'nests' which you can attach to radiators. Perhaps you could buy one of those for the cat's Christmas present?

Apologies if this has already been said Barmy, but does your daughter understand that she has plenty of money?

As she is poor with numbers, have you explained to her that e.g. her monthly income is more than her outgoings, or whatever she would understand?

I'm glad Xmas is sorted anyway.

That's a good idea C.

www.amazon.co.uk/Quality-Pet-Products-Washable-Radiator/dp/B000EDWHZ4/ref=sr_1_5?keywords=cat+radiator+bed&tag=gransnetforum-21&qid=1571917413&sr=8-5

Other retailers available at competitive prices
Our family cats have one each.

Good news all, I had to pay a visit today and only just got back. She was welcoming and told me she had the heating on and she did. It was only low with two radiators on but it felt warmer. So all my nagging has done the trick. We had a lovely day. The reason for my visit was that a young man had called at the house and offered to do the garden (it did need a bit of doing) and she had agreed for him to come back today and it was going to cost £70. As she didn't have the money she wanted me to transfer it into her account, also she wasn't happy that she she didn't really know him.

Anyway to cut a long story short he asked for more money. He got short shift from me and started on the garden. He was finished in just over an hour and he hadn't done all the work, in fact only half of the agreed work was completed so I paid him half the money and told him to go and not come back. The work he had done was not good but still..

Farnorth about money. I show online every month her POA bank account and what has come in and gone out. Also talk with her about next months spending and show her the savings account. She a very good weekly allowance for food and spending. I even pay her local taxi fares monthly so she doesn't have to worry.

So thanks all those that gave me positive advice.

Congratulations on your breakthrough! You’ll probably find she’ll have it on full blast and tropical in a couple of weeks when she finds that being warmer is pleasant! .

May I be the first to wish you a very Happy Christmas

Well done - he was trying it on!
That was still expensive but let's hope he got the message.

Warm is good.
Hope the cat is happy too.

Barmyoldbat, does your daughter care for her cat okay? Food, Water? Vet? If so her learning ability including her empathy development would be good enough?

I wonder why she won't take advice. Maybe NFKDumpling's idea might work. E.g. praise her for making her own decision about heating in the home.
I really do think you will have to abandon all idea of pretty clothing, and dress yourself as for living out of doors. Socks, furry boots, several vests , best warm trouser liners, woolly hat, big scarf.

I had to spend a few hours in a friend's cold house last January and my padded jacket saved me. I also used her woolen sofa throws . She was absent by the way.

Is there mould on your daughter's walls or cupboards?

So glad this situation seems to have resolved itself.
It is so hard when we want the best for our children but also have to respect their independence and own decisions.

I find it hard to keep my counsel and especially as I no longer have Paw to remind me that I do not always know best
(Friends, however well meaning, will usually say what they think you want to hear)
And well done for seeing off the predatory “gardener”
Does she keep cash in the house? She obviously needs some but it sounds as if you keep a careful eye on her without compromising her self confidence.
So pleased for you